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40 of 40 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Refreshingly user friendly
Not really ground breaking, but a refreshingly readable and user friendly book, clearly written for parents. The book is written in an unpretentious manner and acknowledges that not all discipline methods work the same with all children. Many proven techniques are explained with the emphasis on developing a childs personal skills, shutting down negative behaviour, and...
Published on 16 Dec 2001 by Derrick

versus
2.0 out of 5 stars Too American !
I don't like this book, too American! Written by American authors/clinicians and so all the examples of bad behaviour/how to deal with it are geared towards an American way of life.
Published 6 months ago by Sue T


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40 of 40 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Refreshingly user friendly, 16 Dec 2001
By 
Derrick (Ontario Canada) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Try and Make ME!: Simple Strategies That Turn off the Tantrums and Create Co-Operation (Hardcover)
Not really ground breaking, but a refreshingly readable and user friendly book, clearly written for parents. The book is written in an unpretentious manner and acknowledges that not all discipline methods work the same with all children. Many proven techniques are explained with the emphasis on developing a childs personal skills, shutting down negative behaviour, and maintainng parental authority.
Clever (and often humorously unrelated to parenting) analogies made the authors points clear to understand in a lighthearted way.
The book explains why praising and charts/rewards systems are so ineffective with defiant children. Also provided are many helpful scripts and phrases that are useful in shutting down arguing and badgering.
I liked how it was stressed to use empathy and sadness when using consequences (as opposed to anger) making them much more effective. One problem I had though, was that most of the consequences described seemed to involve forcing the child to do something. With non-compliance it is sometimes easier to take something away than to try and force an un-cooperative child to accomplish something.
The book also reminds parents that even the best discipline methods are completely ineffective without first building a strong relationship with your child.
Some other good books with similar philosophies are: "The Manipulative Child: How to Regain Control and Raise Resilient, Resourceful, and Independent Kids", Setting Limits" by Robert J MacKenzie, and "Parenting the Strong-Willed Child".
"Try and Make Me" is an excellent and very encouraging book, well worth reading.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A very useful resource, 6 Jun 2006
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I work with parents and teachers of children with varying degrees of challenging behaviour and recommend this book to all of them. It is written in a no-nonsense, easy to understand way and contains so much common-sense advice. It is useful because it not only points out why some parental approaches don't work, but suggests alternatives that do. It is not condescending or judgemental. I have had to buy several copies of this book over the past few years, since first discovering it, as I have lent it out and have never had it returned! Of all the resources and books I have access to, this is one of the best!
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A simple yet effective guide to resolve common parent traps., 21 Jan 2001
By A Customer
This review is from: Try and Make ME!: Simple Strategies That Turn off the Tantrums and Create Co-Operation (Hardcover)
This book should appeal to parents and to parent educators. It offers simple step-by-step solutions to common problems encountered by parents of very difficult children who are described as defiant, without imposing blame. It focusses on ways of changing children's behaviour that are positive and practical without professional jargon. Easy to read, easy to use, a must for professionals working with parents and a useful resource for parents themselves.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Kids don't come with instructions., 1 Aug 2007
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I absolutely love this book. It's fascinating( and relieving) to know that children's behavior is the same in America as it is here in the UK.
Although I wouldn't class my eldest child as overly defiant, there have been times when I have not had a clue on how to deal with my child's behaviour.This book has shown me that your instincts are not always right.
I loved the analogy of horses and camels and how children can be similar.You will have to read the book to understand that last statement.I could relate to many things mentioned in the book and could also see how many other parents are getting things wrong.Highly recommended.
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2.0 out of 5 stars Too American !, 9 Mar 2014
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I don't like this book, too American! Written by American authors/clinicians and so all the examples of bad behaviour/how to deal with it are geared towards an American way of life.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Very helpful, 23 Sep 2012
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At the end of my tether with my 4 year old I bought this book and found parts of it immensely useful. Something has worked as she has been an absolute angel since I read this. Highly recommend!
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4.0 out of 5 stars Excellent practical advice, 15 Sep 2012
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Very helpful. As the parent of a very challenging adopted child, I've found this really useful. I particularly like the balance between how to manage terrible behaviour as it happens and building the parent-child relationship - and the practical suggestions for doing so.
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5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for any parent or teacher, 28 Aug 2014
Amazing book - a must read and eye opener for any parent or teacher of defiant children !! Worth every penny, a real lifeline
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