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on 1 June 2012
Only read the first couple of chapters and I was in tears. It discribes my life, it was as if Noel had been watching me and the children for the past 6 years and wrote this book about us and the advice for me.
I'm a parent twice over, what I mean is I had 2 children in the early 90's, and I started over again, with another 2 in the latter 00's. The behavioural difference's between both sets of children have been extreme.
Having made a rather good job if it the first time round, I never imagined that I would feel such a failure the 2nd time.
I have never stopped searching for advice from, Doctors, School, Health Advisor, family and friends, even Social Service. Conflicting advice sent me doo-lally.
I became so desparate 12 months ago, that I almost walked out of the lives of my children. I didn,t, I just avoided the morning and evenings by leting them sleep over at their daddies every night, I still struggled through the remainder of each and every day when I wasn't at work or they in school.

After reading only the first few chapters, and using the very first technique on both my children, with startlingly possitive results in a matter of days, I'm in no doubt that this book would enhance any child / adult relationship.

You don't need extra time or money to utilise the advice. Just the willingness to want to improve your relationship with your child/ren. The book does the rest.

I couldn't remember the last time one of my children (girl age 5 and boy 7) hadn't thrown some form of tantrum, each day, either in the morning while getting ready for school, at mealtimes and/or at bed time, etc. They seems to have more, 'press me and I'll kick off buttons', than a shop full of clothes.
This book has given me the insight, and confidence that I have lost over the years. I'm far from out of the wood's and I know that I/we have a long way to go. but I at least believe that I've stumbled onto the right path.

A kind soul bought this book for me. I bought myself a copy after reading 3 chapters and I gave it back to her, so that she could give someone else the benefit of it. And the next time anyone comments on their ill behaved child/ren, I'm going to plug it for all its worth, because it is worth its weight in gold.
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on 27 October 2012
I picked this book up out of desperation! After reading about descriptive praise I used it on my daughter and within 2 days I had a different child!
Thank you for clearing the fog and making me realise that my actions were the main problem.
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on 11 August 2013
.....but I was wrong. This technique totally works, our 4 y.o. has changed in a week com a complete terrorist to a loveable chum. Unbelievable! You just need confidence and patience. You've nothing to lose, right?
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on 12 May 2012
I've never reviewed a book on Amazon before but I wanted to write about Calmer, Easier, Happier Parenting because the techniques it describes really have transformed my approach to parenting.

As the mother of two young boys, I was becoming increasingly despairing about all the nagging and shouting that was happening in our house. I wasn't the mum I'd hoped to be and I often felt embarrassed about the way my children behaved. I'd read various books but nothing seemed to work and I was at a loss as to what to do. A friend told me about the Calmer Easier Happier Parenting courses run by the author of this book Noel Janis-Norton and I did one about a year ago. The techniques that she teaches which are all covered in detail in the book aren't rocket science but if you follow them they really do work.

The basis of the Calmer Easier Happier approach is positive descriptive praise to motivate your child to do the right thing in conjunction with reflective listening which helps you manage your child's strong feelings (invaluable if, like me, you've got a really emotional, volatile child). The 3 other strategies - never ask twice; preparing for success and rewards and consequences - are all used to maximise cooperation and good behavior. The first part of the book goes through each of these strategies in detail and then the next part of the book shows you how to use them in typical flashpoint situations like meal times,getting ready to go to school, bed times, homework and so on. What's great is the level of detail you get about how to use the strategies in a particular situation. By having rules to follow as a parent it takes the guess-work out of trying to work out what is the right thing to do which, for me, makes the whole thing much less emotionally charged.

I can't say that things are always totally calm, easy and happy in our house but things are certainly much much better and it's great to have this book to remind me about about all the alternatives to shouting and nagging.
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on 18 March 2013
Excellent, intelligent and actually also simple book, combining cognitive therapy and child (and parent) psychology, improved home life instantly. Talk about money well spent.
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on 11 February 2015
Take it from one who knows, this is not the book to take with you for a hospital stay. The author says over and over again what she is GOING TO teach you... then finally begins and repeats her point over and over. For all I know the advice may be brilliant and effective, but blow me she's repetitive!
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on 26 May 2012
I listened to this book on audio first and I really recommend this, Noel, herself reads the book and it is easier than reading and needing to process, take in and remember what you have read! Listen whilst cooking, washing up, ironing, before bed etc. However, it was so good I ordered the paperback to refer back to. I felt calmer and happier just reading the book and started using descriptive praise as frequently as possible. Amazed that this works so immediately. Will probably still be a long, hard process to improve my seven year old son's behaviour and cooperation but it will certainly be possible now I have this book! I have read and own so many parenting books and been given advice or suggestions but nothing has ever worked or felt quite right. I really believe it will this time. Thank you so much Noel Janis-Norton!

Every parent should buy this book, I believe the techniques will transform family life (and quickly!)
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on 21 December 2015
Practical, tactical advice for application in the field... or shopping centre... or bedroom. I keep referring back to this book when we move into a new, tricky phase - the advice can be applied to most situations and genuinely works. I'm a creative parent and there isn't much I haven't tried in terms of discipline, praise, reward charts etc etc - nevertheless, I found plenty of new and realistic ideas in this book that have helped get routine under control, homework done and even helped calm the situation immediately during times of stress, fights and tantrums. Highly recommended.
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on 28 August 2012
I've already reviewed an older book by Noel Janis Norton [Can't Smack, Won't Smack] But I thought I'd also write some thoughts on this, her newest book, as her work really deserves praise.

Noel Janis Norton and her parenting school ('Calmer easier happier parenting') are well known in the UK & much appreciated by those parents who feel they need some non-patronising, practical help with their children. It's really worth attending some of the free talks at Janis Norton's centre, where you'll get the chance to hear and discuss the main ideas outlined in this book. But if you don't live nearby or don't have the time / inclination to go to a parenting workshop, this book is the next best thing.

Janis Norton's main philosophy in parenting can be summarized as: on the one hand, parents being in charge and on the other hand, stressing the importance of creating a safe, predictable, respectful environment for children. I have appreciated the nuanced, practical, thoughtful approach to parenting that Janis Norton recommends: it's far from any strong ideology, eg attachment parenting, or pure behaviourism. Rather, it's based on the idea that children need predictable routines, rules and structures, as well as, at the same time, a lot of listening to and good quality time spent together. She emphasises the idea that parents need to be in charge and to know what they expect of their children rather than just shout & change their minds all the time of what they want the children to do. There are plenty of good, practical suggestions along these lines, based on consistency and parental authority; I won't go into too much detail here.

Just to add, from my personal experience, that the technique I've appreciated the most with my young boy is the 'never ask twice' idea. Instead of shouting directions from another room, one time after another (constantly being ignored), Janis Norton suggests only giving a child a direction once, but doing it clearly & firmly, keeping eye contact (so that he / she is not preoccupied with something else), asking them to repeat what you've asked and then expecting them to do it. I have been simply amazed by the fact that when we go to the playground I now tell my son once: 'we will leave in 5 minutes, you have therefore 5 more minutes to play'. When the 5 minutes are over I let him know we're going & he just follows me! When in the past this whole process would take ages & endless, repeated requests. Unbelievable but true that there's been such a big change (and in other areas of our lives too; this is just one example).

Highly recommended, full of practical, down to earth, valuable ideas for parents.
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on 10 August 2012
Some years ago we went to see Noel for help in managing our two fairly normal children aged around 7 and 9. Here are the before and after pictures.

Before: I used to take mine to school 3 days a week and there were days that I came back after dropping them off and needed to lie down for 10 minutes to recover, before I could start work. E.g. `Yes, I do want you to take your coat...I know it's sunny now but take it anyway just in case...It's not stupid... Yes, it does look unlikely that it will rain, but it might'.

After: I was amazed to find myself one morning reading a book by myself in the living room, almost serenely, while they were in the kitchen preparing their packed lunches and getting ready for school. I suddenly realised what I was doing and it struck me how much things had changed. I felt confident that all the things I wanted were taking place - getting dressed and washed, gathering their PE kit, making a packed lunch, unloading the dishwasher etc.

My wife summed it up by saying she just stopped shouting.
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