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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hello, Hello, Hello ....
If someone put a gun to my head and asked me to name my favourite book evereverever, I'd scream, "The Third Policeman by Flann O'Brien", and then I'd disarm the cowardly weasel with some nifty kung-fu moves. This is a Great book. It is probably one of the most intelligent, warped and pant-wettingly hilarious novels ever written. I cannot describe the plot without...
Published on 17 Feb 2010 by frapatroo

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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars About bicycles and murder most foul
I found a lot of The Third Policeman esoteric,high falutin nonsense,subject to footnotes and theories of one De Selby,a philosopher and scientist,of whom the nameless narrator is an acolyte.Murder is an intimate theme, surrealistic conversation and conceptions of reality that lead the characters,John Divney,narrator,Joe,Old Mathers,the three policemen,Martin Finnucane,a...
Published 6 months ago by technoguy


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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hello, Hello, Hello ...., 17 Feb 2010
If someone put a gun to my head and asked me to name my favourite book evereverever, I'd scream, "The Third Policeman by Flann O'Brien", and then I'd disarm the cowardly weasel with some nifty kung-fu moves. This is a Great book. It is probably one of the most intelligent, warped and pant-wettingly hilarious novels ever written. I cannot describe the plot without giving away its sublime surprises ... but it does contain some odd notions about bicycles, the king of the one-legged-men, and some mind-imploding cod-science. Flann O'Brien ... Gord bliss him for sharing his genius and giving us this wonderful thing.
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28 of 29 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars One of the best, 19 May 2007
I've recently re-read this book after many years and on finishing it my thoughts now are exactly the same as they were the first time.

"Flann O'Brien is a twisted genius."

The language, the turn of phrase and the surreal aspects to the story (including the often hilarious footnotes) are unparalleled. This is a brilliant book and your life is much less complete without reading it.
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81 of 87 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Don't get Lost..., 16 Mar 2006
This review is from: The Third Policeman (Paladin Books) (Paperback)
If you're coming to this book after the hype about it appearing on Lost, then the first thing you need to know is that it's one of the strangest books you're ever likely to read - and if it's not, I'll have some of what you're having. The Third Policeman is a remarkable book by any standards, even if (like me, hem hem) you fail to grasp the ending until you read the publisher's footnote afterwards. In fact the second half generally is not as hot as the first, and O'Brien seems to tread water most of the time after positively squirming with creative energy for the first hundred-odd pages. The book was written in 1940 but not published until 1967, after his death. It is narrated by a man who has literally no name, who has murdered someone for money and sets about recovering the stash. In doing so he encounters mad policemen obsessed with bicycles (including the eponymous third one), the atomic physics, and scale and size.
One of the finest long passages in the book, which had me drumming my heels in pure visceral pleasure, is when the policeman MacCruiskeen shows the narrator a little wooden chest he has made, "perfect in its proportions and without fault in its workmanship." It turns out that he has made thirty more, each smaller than the last and contained inside its predecessor, of which series even the thirteenth one was so small it "took me three years to make and it took me another year to believe that I had made it." What I particularly delighted in was the off-kilter and yet just-so dialogue between the policeman and our man:
"There now," said MacCruiskeen.
"It is nearly too nice," I said at last, "to talk about it."
"I spent two years manufacturing it when I was a lad," said MacCruiskeen, "and it still takes me to the fair."
"It is unmentionable," I said.
"Very nearly," said MacCruiskeen.
Also the book has a running background featuring the works of mythical Irish philosopher de Selby (shades of Vonnegut here), who believed among other things that night was merely an accumulation of dark particles in the air caused by pollution, and that sleep was a series of fits brought on by exposure to the particles. Much of the stuff about his notions of the world and indeed his several commentators and biographers is richly inventive and comic.
"His theory as I understand it is as follows.
"If a man stands before a mirror and sees in it his reflection, what he sees is not a true reproduction of himself but a picture of himself when he was a younger man. De Selby's explanation of this phenomenon is quite simple. Light, as he points out truly enough, has an ascertained and finite rate of travel. Hence before the reflection of any object in a mirror can be said to be accomplished, it is necessary that rays of light should first strike the object and subsequently impinge on the glass, to be thrown back again to the object - to the eyes of the man, for instance. There is therefore an appreciable and calculable interval of time between the throwing by a man of a glance at his own face in a mirror and the registration of the reflected image in his eye.
"So far, one may say, so good. Whether this idea is right or wrong, the amount of time involved is so negligible that few reasonable people would argue the point. But de Selby ever loath to leave well enough alone, insists on reflecting the first reflection in a further mirror and professing to detect minute changes in this second image. Ultimately he constructed the familiar arrangement of parallel mirrors, each reflecting diminishing images of an interposed object indefinitely. The interposed object in this case was de Selby's own face and this he claims to have studied backwards through an infinity of reflections by means of "a powerful glass." What he states to have seen through his glass is astonishing. He claims to have noticed a growing youthfulness in the reflections of his face according as they receded, the most distant of them - too tiny to be visible to the naked eye - being the face of a beardless boy of twelve, and, to use his own words, "a countenance of singular beauty and nobility." He did not succeed in pursuing the matter back to the cradle "owing to the curvature of the earth and the limitations of the telescope.""
So in some ways The Third Policeman is just a framework for O'Brien to hang lots of silly ideas on, and as novels go it's not distinguished by a strong urge to discover what happens next. But the writing is intricate and beautifully judged throughout, making it the rarity of a comic novel which requires full brow-furrowed attention to read. At times it feels like the best book you have ever read and at times it can be a bit of a drag. Which, as I said earlier, makes it remarkable by any standards. Whether it will help you solve the mysteries of a certain TV serial, I don't know ... as far as that goes, I'm Lost.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Review of audiobook, 14 Aug 2007
Naxos should be praised for releasing The Third Policeman as an audiobook and getting one of Ireland's finest actors, Jim Norton, to read it.
Fans of the book will find the reading opens up the story, and if you love the book this CD is essential. The atmosphere of the strange countryside the narrator travels in, the comic conversations, the obsession with bicycles - all these and more come alive.
Norton's reading is, at first shade brisk, but the listener quickly adapts to it. He adopts a confidential tone that matches O'Brien's prose style, which itself counterpoints the absurdist story.
All the voices are beautifully delineated, except the voice of Joe, which is a little too much like the narrator's. I feel embarrassed to level any criticism at this recording, but I might as well be honest about it.
That aside, it's a triumph.
Towards the end of his life O'Brien enjoyed a stage adaptation of The Dalkey Archive - and I'm sure he would have loved Norton's reading of The Third Policeman just as much.
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39 of 42 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Bicycles, omnium, pints of porter and further imponderables, 2 Dec 2003
By 
Eddie Lacooz (London, United Kingdom) - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Third Policeman (Paladin Books) (Paperback)
I recommend that anyone with a sense of humour reads this book. I first read this at school aged 15 and loved it. I have just re read it and realised that I hadn't even picked up the half of its brilliance.
Flann O'Brien (real name Brian O'Nolan, who also wrote under the pseudonym Myles na Gopaleen) is a genius. His imagination, his turn of phrase, his sense of humour, each of these would be the envy of many an acclaimed author. To have them all displayed so expertly in one novel... as you can tell I loved it. I have spent the past few days consistently hurting with laughter. Proper belly-laughter. After finishing the book I have gone back to re-read sections.
The story begins normally enough on an Irish farm. At the beginning the lyrical prose is entertaining enough, but following a rather dark crime by the narrator the book takes off, with the narrator trying to retain his sanity as event after surreal event unravels before him.
Anyone who can create the eminent philosopher De Selby, whose thoughts pepper the book deserves any praise that comes their way. De Selby's theories include, "A row of houses is a row of necessary evils" (houses have lead to the softening of the human race); "night is in fact accumulations of black air", a sort of volcanic dust which obscures day & consequently sleep is in fact a series of fits and heart attacks; "journeys are an hallucination"; and who, in my favourite moment, following up his theory that when you look at a reflection of yourself in the mirror you see a younger version of yourself, sets up two mirrors opposite each other, producing an infinite series of reflections. De Selby then looks through a telescope and claims to have seen himself as a young boy.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars If you're worth your salt, you'll read this, 16 April 2010
By 
P. Gough (Shropshire, UK) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
Whenever I try to explain what this book is about to anyone, I cannot do the task justice. It is in part a thriller, a murder mystery, a dark comedy and a philosophical journey. It is self conscious and absurdist, but speaks greater sense than any book that immediately springs to my mind.

There is no point in explaining the story, as it is a faint one, providing a vehicle for settings and wonderful moments, that seemingly stretch into infinity. Remember when you were a child and things seemed to have a less definitive form, and the world was more ready to confess it's dream-like nature? This book captures that. It is a book about form and formlessness and the nature of all things, as experienced through the agony of being a living thing.

The most significant feature this book has to offer is the way it is written. Flann O'Brien is compared to James Joyce not without good cause, amidst the swathes of irony, suggestion and paradox there is a distinctly Irish tone to a book that was way ahead of its time, and probably benefited from its initial refusal at the publishers desk.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A SURREAL AND COMIC CLASSIC, 24 Oct 1999
By A Customer
This review is from: The Third Policeman (Paladin Books) (Paperback)
Like an excellent film - this story does reward a re-visit from time to time, as it is so dense. The beautifully observed descriptions of the mental workings of the helpless "Little Man", and the imaginative constructs regarding "Eternity" , etc., more than make up for the comical, quasi-scientific DE SELBY footnotes - which do go on a bit!
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars You'll never look at bicyicles in the same way..., 6 Aug 2006
By 
Dark Jimbo (Hampshire, England) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: The Third Policeman (Paladin Books) (Paperback)
Reading this masterpiece it becomes immediately obvious where comedy writers such as Terry Pratchett and Robert Rankin, and all their lesser copycats, learnt their craft. It's all here - wild flights of fancy, bewildering and tangenital footnotes that quickly become longer than the chapters themselves, meandering conversations that leave everyone (including the reader) confused, some truly inspired pieces of barmy reverse-logic - and it's all great fun.

It begins with a murder by two desperate men somewhere in Ireland, but rapidly goes to all manner of strange places. The book is mainly a satire on the archetypal village police force taken to ludicrous extremes, and O' Brien uses his two monstrous policemen not only to great comic effect, but to expound all manner of strange theories. Some of the ideas are just plain barmy, yet all make an odd sort of sense within the book's own internal sense of logic. O' Brien also manages to shoot the book through with a creeping, brooding menace that you don't even realise is there until the nerve-biting climax begins, an impressive feat given the often outre subject matter.

And the bicycles. Was there ever a book or set of characters so obsessed with them? Bikes that are almost human, humans that are almost bike, and the main character's surprisingly touching and sweet love-affair with a female bicycle near the end was astonishingly well-written, considering the barmy subject. And what's weirdest is how it all makes so much sense. For instance - you know how you'll sometimes see a bike in a hallway or kitchen on a stormy, rainy evening? Person A will assume person B put it there, person B assumes person A put it there, and no-one thinks to comment. The truth is that the bike, naturally enough, just decided to come in from the cold and the wet...

I don't really think I'm doing a very good job explaining the book, but even that is almost a testament to what Flann O' Brien created - a novel that really has to be read to be appreciated. Buy it on a leap of faith - I did, and soon realised just why it's considered such an important book. You won't find anything else like it.
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Just read this book, 29 Oct 2002
This review is from: The Third Policeman (Paladin Books) (Paperback)
I read this book about 25 years ago, and this year it's on my Christmas list. Forget everything you've read in other reviews. The plot is fun, the allegory unmistakable but thought provoking, the de Selby foot notes are hilarious (as long as you don't think they're real) and the inventions of Miles na Gopalleen (nee Flann O'Brien) are pieces of Milligan and Rankin (Robert, that is) mixed together with his own absurdist quality thrown in for good measure.
O'Brien is an unsung genius of comic literature, and "The Third Policeman" is his masterpiece.
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining to the end, 21 July 2009
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This review is from: The Third Policeman (Paperback)
A lot of reviews say this is a strange book. There was nothing strange about my copy... It had a back and front cover with pages between them. On the pages were words, black ink on a white background. Each page had a number one higher than the last page.

If you've red this and you are thinking what a stupid review then it's probably best you don't bother reading the book...
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The Third Policeman (Paladin Books)
The Third Policeman (Paladin Books) by Flann O'Brien (Paperback - 16 Aug 1993)
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