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30 of 30 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars My Lovely Dad
Oh!How I wish I'd read this book 9 months ago. My lovely Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in May 2003, it became metastatic and sadly he died December 2003.
I was of course devastated and had great trouble coming to terms with his death. This book has done more to help me in the two days it took to read than several bereavement councilling sessions and 2 bottles of...
Published on 28 Feb 2004 by Mrs D Kalirai

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0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Final Gifts
I got the books for a present. The cover on one book was fitted back to front and upside down.
Published 15 months ago by laurence Martin


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30 of 30 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars My Lovely Dad, 28 Feb 2004
By 
Mrs D Kalirai (Cannock, Staffs United Kingdom) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
Oh!How I wish I'd read this book 9 months ago. My lovely Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in May 2003, it became metastatic and sadly he died December 2003.
I was of course devastated and had great trouble coming to terms with his death. This book has done more to help me in the two days it took to read than several bereavement councilling sessions and 2 bottles of anti depressants. I am now more at peace with his passing.
There is so much information in this book. What we thought was his mind being confused, was so much more. No wonder he got frustrated with us. My Dad,smiled, waved and spoke to people we could not see. In his final hours gained an unknown strength and tried to get out of bed. His final gift to me was for me not to see his last laboured breath, he died within two minutes of me leaving the room to get some air.
Thank you both authours for this wonderful, informative and compassionate book. It is a must read for anyone who has someone they love diagnosed with a terminal illness.
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23 of 23 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The name says it all., 23 Jan 2002
By A Customer
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
Six years ago my mother and I read this book after she had been diagnosed with breast cancer and a niece of hers had terminal ovarian cancer. Both my mother and I found so much peace in the book. Five years after her initial diagnosis my mother's breast cancer recurred suddenly and aggressively in her brain and spinal fluid. The choice of the family was to bring her to her home, surrounded by her five children, their spouses and her grandchildren. She lived for a week, cared for by her family and her hospice nurses. That week will be remembered by all of us as one of the best weeks of our lives. It was a time of celebration of her life of 76 years - friends, neighbors, and family were ever present with love and support. My mother's final gift to us was our strong sense of famiy; our final gift to her was to allow her to die in dignity and peace surrounded by her loved ones. It was this book that led us to having a fantastic experience that enriched all of our lives in a way we could never have imagined. We are very grateful to Hospice and to this book.
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22 of 22 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars For those who might not know what to do or say..., 31 Oct 2000
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
Over the past few years, when faced with the information that someone I'd known was dying, I did - nothing.
Retreating, I was terrified of my own mortality and of what I might do if I were around someone who was dying. Would I say the wrong thing or nothing at all? Would I cry, or do something to inadvertently hurt them? What is dying like?
This book is great as a comforting instruction manual on what happens, what to do, and what not to do.
It begins with information about what happens to the body when it is in the process of dying, then moves into experiences the authors have had in dealing with people who are dying, or whose loved ones are dying. They have helpful information throughout the book for those, like me, who were unsure about what to say or do.
They include individual stories about messages people send when they are approaching death and how not to miss them; seeing people who have already died and what that may mean; symbolic dreams and how to let the dreamer find the meaning; choosing a time to die (not by suicide); waiting for a person to arrive or an event to happen.
Family and friends often ignore this precious information. It seems illogical, far out, too much like stories about abduction by aliens. We brush them off as hallucinations, caused by denial or possibly drug-induced.
When I first heard volunteers, nurses and others who work in hospice tell stories of people who have similar Nearing Death Experiences (not to be confused with "Near Death Experiences"), I was dubious. However, in my readings and hospice volunteer work, I find that these stories are universal, timeless and not as new age-y as I'd thought. We've been ignoring these wonderfully soothing stories of how people die, because for years we've (United States, primarily) moved birthing and dying out of the family and into hospitals. We are beginning to move them back.
If you've lost a loved one, are dealing with someone who is dying (yourself or someone else), if you avoid visiting friends who are dying or if you're struggling with your own awareness that someday you will die, please read this book. It will put your mind at ease.
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14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An uplifting book full of hope for those left behind, 20 July 1999
By A Customer
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
When my family brought hospice in to care for my mother, Maggie Callanan was our hospice nurse. Through her, we were able to help our mother die with dignity and grace. She helped us every step of the way. 10 years later, as my Dad was also dying, we again called hospice and, thru sheer coincidence, Maggie was again assigned to us. This is when we learned of Final Gifts. This book allowed my entire family to truly appreciate the dreams and thoughts my Dad was having and helped us to understand what he was experiencing and assisted us in providing for him as he departed this life. I am convinced that it was no coincidence that this wonderful nurse, this angel on earth, entered our lives a second time. Reading this book has given me renewed hope that there is something beyond this life and it truly is a better place.
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Final Gifts, 1 April 2005
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
I think this book is excellent for anyone caring for a terminally-ill person. Whether it's a partner, parent, friend, sibling, relative. It really explains in a simple manner what the signs are, what to look out for and how to really understand the needs of the dying. I found it extremely comforting to read this, although I have to say I read it with tears in my eyes as some of the stories hit very close to home and were really moving. It also gave comfort as it really does give you a sense of the spiritual side of dying and the signs and the fact that the dying person can sometimes be "in control" of what is happening around them. It was a great comfort and I would highly recommend it.
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars must read for anyone caring for terminallly ill, 12 May 1998
By A Customer
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
FINAL GIFTS was recommended to me when my father was dying of pancreatic cancer. As an only child who had just buried her mother (and wife of father for 53 years) several months earlier, this book brought an inner peace to me when the doctor indicated Dad had at the most six months. As it turned out, thank God, I had him for two years. But there were several times when we thought we would lose him. It was a great help to have read FINAL GIFTS and know the signs of the final times and also that until Dad had done all he wanted and felt he needed to do, he was not going anywhere. On his final day, my son, who was extremely close to his Pap, would not tell him it was okay to go and be at peace. My Dad lingered and suffered the entire day. The doctors and nurses could not understand what kept him going. At 5:45PM my son finally whispered his goodbyes to Dad and he left go and went with dignity and peace at 6:00PM, with his minister praying at his side and his entire family surrounding his bed. Knowing that Mom was on the other side for him also made letting go somewhat easier. FINAL GIFTS is a good source of information and should be read by any and all persons caring for loved ones with terminal illness.
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars In memory of my beautiful mum., 11 Sep 2006
By 
D. Ratcliffe "Diane" (England) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
I read this book whilst sitting at my mums bedside as she slept through her last week of illness with a high grade brain tumour.
This book brought me untold comfort to know that not only do these wonderful nurses exist but to actually watch them at work. I saw my mums dimise and passing in an amazingly different way as I read each page. It gave me an understanding and sense of peace that I didnt know before. My mum died the day after I finshed reading the last page and I think I know when her wonderful spirit left. It was an hour before her earthly body gave up it's fight for life.
Read this book and take comfort from it that death is not the end but the beginning of another adventure. In memory of my beautiful mummy.
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I wish I had read this book sooner., 22 Jun 1998
By A Customer
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
I wish I had read this remarkable book prior to my mother's death. Perhaps I would have been able to better understand what she was trying to communicate to me. It should be required reading for anyone involved with the terminally ill.
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars You must own this book!, 24 Sep 1998
By A Customer
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
Five years ago one of my dearest friends was dying of cancer. His friends could see the end approaching but he wanted to fight to the very end. When his health care provider offered hospice services, he refused because he was not willing to agree to "no heroic measures." His statement was, "I want them to try everything to keep me alive." My husband and I had been caring for him and we took a weekend break to visit family. In one of our favorite used book stores I literally fell over this book. I bought it and started reading it to my husband on our way home. I was so impressed with the information and the comfort it provided to the patient and the family that I suggested we read it to our friend. We started reading on Sunday. On Monday he agreed to the hospice care and he died on Thursday. His last statement to his former wife was, "Please leave me alone, woman. I'm trying to die here." I know that the stories in this book and the truth about what it is like to die helped him let go. Since that experience I have bought numerous copies of this book because I keep giving it away. We will all face death and this book is the best handbook there is.
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great help, 30 Sep 2003
By A Customer
This review is from: Final Gifts (Paperback)
My brother recently fought a brain tumour and spent the final 3 months of his life in a hospice. We are not the sort of people who are "sentimental" or very expressive, but this book was a tremendous help. It helped us to start to understand some of the things that he was going through and trying to get us to understand. Clearly if you are reading it whilst facing a death then it will be a mixture of sadness and other emotions, but I cannot recommed this book highly enough.
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Final Gifts
Final Gifts by Kelley (Paperback - 5 Oct 1998)
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