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4.4 out of 5 stars
Seven Choices: Finding Daylight After Loss Shatters Your World
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29 of 29 people found the following review helpful
on 24 May 1999
I am so happy I found this book. It was passed around to everyone in my grief support group.we only had 2 copies and at the time we tried to buy more we were told it was out of print.Everyone will be happy to hear they can buy there own copy now.I read every book I could get my hands on when my husband died.This book gave me the strength,hope & spirit to go on with my life
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
TOP 500 REVIEWERon 3 July 2012
The author had the terrible experience of her relatively young husband dropping dead while jogging. They had only been married for four years. In her quest to find a way to deal with the loss she used her researcher's skills to find other bereaved people and collate the information into this helpful book. She takes you through what she has identified as seven stages on the road to acceptance of what has happened and a pathway for finding a new life without the loved one. Her loss was when she was young and she was able to find solace through her career and a new relationship, the book is is just as helpful to those who are much older and who have lost a loved one after many years of marriage or who have lost a child. Although these are different kinds of bereavement, the progression from shock and disbelief to acceptance and some form of recovery appear to follow a similar path. You'll weep at the recognition of what you're feeling but the reminder that others have felt the same and found some kind of stability over time gives hope that the pain will eventually lessen and there will be days when you don't cry and repeated thoughts of your loss intrude. I do recommend this book. I had been a bit wary (and unreasonably prejudiced) about book by an American author, but found her advice sensible and comforting.
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34 of 35 people found the following review helpful
If you have been recently bereaved, read this book. If you know someone who has lost someone close, buy them a copy of this book and get them to read it. It will help them enormously. The author has written a deeply-felt, very thoughtful and supportive work here. It guides you through the seven stages of bereavement, and helps you recognise that everything you are feeling is normal. The author discusses her own experience of widowhood at an early age and includes short quotes from bereaved and divorced people she has interviewed. As a result, the whole approach is extremely sympathetic and gently encouraging. It is like the author takes you hand and personally guides you from the point of impact right through to reintegration into a normal, rebuilt life.
I cannot recommend it highly enough and would give it six or even seven stars, if I could.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful
on 19 January 1998
Seven Choices was recommended to me six years ago when our son died. We recently lost a second son and I remembered Seven Choices and have again started to read it for healing and growth.
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
on 25 May 1999
I am in retreat ministry and use Seven Choices as a foundational resource when presenting grief workshops and/or facilitating bereavement support groups. This author "tells it like it is" in a very down-to-earth fashion. She shares her personal experience of loss in ways that invite the reader to also open up and share life's greatest wound and greatest challenge...LOSS.
When Elizabeth Harper Neeld presents Seven Choices in a weekend retreat the participants feel compassionately affirmed and look forward with hope for the experience of the "turning-point".
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
Not everything in this book rings true for me - but I would recommend it to anyone who has been hit by loss, especially where there are feelings of ambivalence or, as in my case, a very sudden and unexpected death, which left many hopes unrealised and plans unfinished. A good read, and very grounding just when you're being swept up in a tornado of grief.
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
on 14 October 1998
This book helped many of us who were part of a young widows/widowers support group. We used each chapter as a discussion guide! Best wishes to anyone in need.
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful
on 19 March 1999
After losing my husband at the age of 33 I found myself with nobody in the same situation to share my feelings with. This book helped me focus the feelings I had, which were often so overwhelming and confusing. I found myself reading her quotes of other people's feelings and experiences and saying "yes - that's it - I feel that too". The book was such help to me that I buy a bunch of them from time to time and share them with friends who lose someone close to them.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
on 24 October 2013
Even though this book was written more than 20 years ago, each of the seven steps mentioned in this book were exactly what I was going through right now. There were so many emotions and processes i was experiencing and that I couldn't put words to, and yet the author described them perfectly. My husband also passed away in the same way that the author's husband passed away and was much younger too so I felt that this was the perfect book for me at this time. I had many many 'aha' moments, saying to myself this is exactly what I am going through now. Through this book, the author gave me hope that I would come out of this process alive and well, and she has included many stories from other people that have experienced losses that I didn't feel so quite alone. This is an excellent guide for anyone who is going through the process of mourning/ grieving a spouse.
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17 of 20 people found the following review helpful
on 6 December 1997
An outstanding reference book that identifies the unexplainable myriad of emotions that one experiences when losing someone, not only to death, but to divorce and other losses as well. Very articulate, Elizabeth Harper Neeld has "been there, done that" every inch of the way. It reads almost like a novel, though it's not, and is hard to put down. I used to administer a medical examiner's office and this was the only book on grief that I'd recommend to the family members/friends with whom we had to work.
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