Amazon.co.uk: Customer Reviews: She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman

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39 of 42 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars An excellent place to start (though a bit prescriptive & misses out one erogenous zone!)
When I asked my new boyfriend to go down on me, he said he'd tried it once but didn't like it because he "wasn't very good at it". He begrudgingly agreed to give it a go next time, which wasn't exactly a great turn on!

So I went to Hoxton's women only sex shop Sh! & asked what they recommended to help my boyfrienf find his inner passion for cunnilingus, so...
Published 9 months ago by Jayne in London

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25 of 159 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars ok stuff really
tried it out on a girl i picked up in the uni bar the other night she seemed impressed
Published on 19 Nov 2005 by graeme22uk

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39 of 42 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars An excellent place to start (though a bit prescriptive & misses out one erogenous zone!), 9 Feb 2009
By Jayne in London (London, England) - See all my reviews
  
When I asked my new boyfriend to go down on me, he said he'd tried it once but didn't like it because he "wasn't very good at it". He begrudgingly agreed to give it a go next time, which wasn't exactly a great turn on!

So I went to Hoxton's women only sex shop Sh! & asked what they recommended to help my boyfrienf find his inner passion for cunnilingus, so we could enjoy it together. The shop assistant recommended this book, together with some flavoured lubricant (she said could this help him to overcome any initial reticence to get stuck in - the flavour wears off of course, leaving the man basking in the woman's natural scent & taste, by which time hopefully he'll enjoy it).

I read the book first, to see what information my boyfriend would be primed with and ... well, it's not perfect.

For a start, the diagrams are a little hard to understand: they would be infinitely better in colour, & should also show the woman's genitalia both before & during arousal, & should compare them with male genialia, so that readers really get it into our heads that male & female genitalia are very similar, just positioned differently, & that women have erections too!

I think it is this anatomical knowledge that will help guys understand why they need to do certain things: women need exactly the same stimulation as men, maybe more, but our bits are arranged differently, which is why penetration alone will not work for many of us.

Anyhow, after squinting at the diagrams, I figure they are a pretty good start at least in giving guys a rough idea of where to aim for, & why (but can you name the missing erogenous zone ...?).

However, I also felt the text was a bit dense in places: it might put some guys off that it's so detailed. I think the book should reassure men that they just need to get an overall impression of what goes where: there's no test at the end! Take a deep breath, read it through & emerge the other side full of knowledge!

Also, although I think the title is great - & really helpful!! - it is inaccurate: the book is solely and completely about the technique of cunnilingus. It touches briefly on all the other stuff the man needs to do, but really all it does is to lay out a military campaign for how to use your tongue on a woman.

Also, it is very prescriptive: first do this, then do this, then do this. I can tell you, not all women will like this specific order. Not all of us need our ankles tied together either (yes really!). Also, in order to remember everything, I think the man would have to record it onto tape then play it on headphones while he was down there ...

That said, overall the book is great & one I would recommend; but not as the sole book you buy, for the reasons above. I think the main benefit of the book is that a MAN is explaining, in guy language, what he needs to do rather than the woman trying to explain (some men see it as undermining to be "told what to do" in bed, so an independent third party reference source can be useful). It allows a man to go away & study up on an area he may feel he lacks skills in, rather than waiting to the heat of the moment then getting worried he won't "do it right".

If all a man takes away from this is that (i) penetration alone doesn't work & why, & that (ii) women need just as much stimulation as men then this is a giant leap towards orgasms for all!
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82 of 93 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars One of my favourite books, 11 Jun 2007
I like to reread this book because it was eye-opening and very valuable for me. I didn't know that the female intimate zone consists of so many different parts and is extremely sensitive due to a huge number of nerve endings. I am happy that so knowledgeable expert describes step-by-step which part after which part to stimulate in order to lead your lady to orgasm. I feel a lot more comfortable when it comes to orally pleasing my wife after I read this book. She doesn't have to be that involved now because I simply follow the clear and very detailed instructions and she literary melts in front of my eyes. I agree that she comes first and yet guys do pamper yourself as well with the secrets from "scientfically guaranteed male multiple orgasms and ultimate sex". My experience shows that when both partners have mind blowing time in bed spontaneity, libido and passion increase with each love making. I believe that every caring for his sexual education, performance and lady man should read she comes first. It is one of the few that contains exclusive and very valuable information that will make a great difference for your girl and your confidence.
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20 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A great book for most guys. , 24 Oct 2007
This book can really help a guy understand things he didn't before. It's a good one to start with. I found loads of good info. I also liked Sex Machine: A Man's Guide to What Really Pleases a Woman in Bed and would recommend it as well.
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59 of 69 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars My boyfriend is now an expert!, 6 Nov 2006
This book has been a great help to my boyfriend who, after reading it, is now an expert. I have never had oral sex like it! I highly recommend any man reading it who wants to give his girlfriend REAL pleasure in the sack.
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14 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars She Comes First, 24 Aug 2008
Oh my god! I never knew books like this could help a woman have such fantasic oral sex!!! What have I been missing all this time? The best oral sex I've ever had that's for sure! The man I've recently met has read this book and boy does it work! We also spent a very nice time together reading this and I learnt a thing or two about some of the orogenous zones I never knew I had! Great book!
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20 of 24 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars The book every guy should own., 30 Mar 2008
By J. R. Cook "jamiec46" (Chelmford, United Kingdom) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This book is a real gem and lives up to it's title, Ian Kerner is a hero.
Written in a friendly, non-clinical manner, this takes away all the mystery that surrounds this vital piece of love making. What higher recommendation can I say other than it won me my future Wife!

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6 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Required Reading for ALL Men, 14 Aug 2008
They should erect statues in his honor.

It's not one of those cheesy books where the author claims to have all the secrets, but leaves you wanting... he really does. Hats off!
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25 of 159 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars ok stuff really, 19 Nov 2005
tried it out on a girl i picked up in the uni bar the other night she seemed impressed
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5.0 out of 5 stars Wow!, 16 Nov 2009
By Wormy (Kent, UK) - See all my reviews
This is the first review I have written, on any subject, ever, so obviously the book stirred desire in me enough to share my thoughts with any others on the path to greater sexual pleasure.
My partner brought the book last year, completly of his own accord. I had never complained about his cunnilingal skills, but he obviously felt he could improve, and my oh my he did! I thought I had climaxed through oral stimulation before but after he practised the moves learnt from this book he gave me the most mind blowing and earth shattering O's I have ever had. The confidence this has now given him knowing he has the power to turn me into quivering, heavenly mush is such a turn on for both of us and has improved our sexual relationship tenfold. I have not read the book but it is a must for any unselfish men who understand that women need a little more attention in that department and would like to see the look of complete sexual satisfaction on their partners face - also for any women who feel their partner needs a little help in this department, this is a must buy. No better Christmas present!!
There is one warning tho, to the girls - your partner learning these skills may turn you into an obsessed nymphomaniac, as you will never get enough!!!
She comes first..... And He comes a very happy second :)
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0 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars a good read, 18 Feb 2009
A good read, lots of helpful hints and tips that should build to the eventual conclusion
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She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman
She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman by Ian Kerner (Paperback - 21 April 2005)
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