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4.7 out of 5 stars30
4.7 out of 5 stars
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on 9 October 2013
I would strongly recommend this book, and not just for stepmums, but for the husbands or partners in a step-family too. The core themes, of the importance of communication, patience, understanding are relevant to both sexes. And the core problems, such as not being sure what your role is, feeling resentful, the ex causing issues, are also something that both adults in the relationship could think about.

The book was easy to read, in that it was free from gobbledygook type jargon. It was inspiring however, and thought provoking. It was organised and structured in its approach, but most importantly it came up with ways of dealing with the problems of being a step-mum that are positive and aimed at reducing animosity long term. It does not advocate being a doormat, but the approach does remind us that to be truly happy we do need to give and take, and let time tell, and be patient and kind -not constantly trying to assert our rights and territory. Often in the book - and this is a good thing - the author does not preach to the reader what the correct answer to a problem is (such as who disciplines the children?), but reminds us that whatever it may be will come from the step parent and biological parent communicating honestly about the problem together, agreeing a solution and applying it consistently.

I read the book cover to cover, but have already delved into it from time to time to read back over some passages that I found particularly helpful, and advised my partner to read it too.
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on 14 June 2010
Easy to read. Read it cover to cover in 2 days. Helpful to know that there are others out there in the same boat! Thanks.
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on 7 March 2011
Can't believe just how good this book is. It has totally transformed my relationship with my step son. Its easy to read and packed full of straight forward advice for all types of step mums (i.e. with kids, without kids, full time or part time). Definitely recommend it as both a self help guide and gift.
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on 8 August 2013
This was recommended to me by a step family relationships professional and I did find one chapter matched my circumstances closely. I think most of the rest of the book was for people in different circumstances. The advice was sound. Did I follow it? Well no given the age of the stepchild (late teens) and my lack of desire to try it. Have things improved? Cautiously I will say yes but mainly due to my change of attitude rather than anything else. I simply disengaged.
I did have a flick at other chapters and they seemed not applicable to my situation but would have been useful had my husbands children been younger.
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on 4 October 2013
Got this book as although I'm not new to the game, I was struggling with a few issues that weren't going away. Lisa provides realistic, practical advice to help you and your partner work through the problems you face. Also good that she quotes other stepmums, so you are reassured that it's not just you who feels what you feel, and your mental/emotional struggles are not unique. A recommended read for new-to-the-role stepmums, as well as the veteran ones!
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on 7 March 2016
I've not quite finished this book yet due to a mad lifestyle these past few weeks! What I have read so far though has been easy to follow and not patronising. It's also nice to have an English point of view as most information on the web is American!
I'm 24 with no children of my own and what started off as a good relationship with my Stepkids and their bio-mum, has recently become difficult due to the bio-mum turning into a Jekyl and Hyde character and my Step Daughter reaching the dreaded hormonal stage! After a few episodes, I completely lost my confidence and having no-one my age in the same situation, I needed help! This book has provided real comfort knowing I'm not alone and everything I'm feeling is normal! It's given me another take on things rather than fretting and reading in to everything too much and has taught me to deal with things more effectively. Whilst I feel a lot of the book doesn't relate to me a great deal, I have still been able to take advice and comfort from the authors words.
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on 19 May 2010
This is a really excellent book full of insights and sound advice. The book draws on the real life experiences of other stepmums and step by step looks at the different relationships that a stepmum has to manage (partner, step children, own children, ex, step children's real mother..!). By understanding the dynamics of each it shows how you can adapt to change your life from simply coping to something altogether more positive. Highly recommended.
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on 10 May 2010
This book is written for anyone who has found themselves in the realm of being a step-parent, and suddenly realises that falling in love and having to accept your new family are not the major hurdles, indeed the real hurdle is everything else that goes with the title "step Parent".

This is obviously written by someone who has found themselves emerged in this , inherited family status and has worked to win and has then spoken to other Step mums and actually listened, pondered, learnt and then written.

If you have recently been rudely and abruptly woken from the world of true love and slung into the real and sometimes harsh world of step parenting, then this book will guide, advise and support you through this real and new environment. And even if you have been doing it for years it will help to know that there are hundreds, thousands, more of us out there and that Dr. Doodson took the time to understand and write this book.

I am gushing but I am VERY grateful to the author

Thank you Dr Doodson, it is the real world but I am not alone!
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on 4 December 2014
Easy read, informative, realistic, & above all you can really relate to everything Dr Doodson is saying, it has really helped me & my other half
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on 25 November 2015
Im an 'unoffical' stepmum (not married) of 24 to my boyfriends 7 year old daughter.. a very scary transition was eased by this book.. knowing my up and down thought patterns were normal was a relief and whenever i need a pick me up or reassurance first thing i do is turn to this book. its been a life changer for me.. must have for new stepmums, experienced or girlfriends xxx
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