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86 of 86 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great ' first ' to turn to when the unimaginable happens.
This was the first book to catch my eye in the bookstore when I found myself alone after over 20 yrs. of marriage and was utterly devestated.
It became my 'bible', beside my bed. I highlighted all the bits about how to create happiness in your life, reread them constantly.
Alot of the ideas about being responsible for creating your own happiness were new to me...
Published on 13 May 2002

versus
7 of 10 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars A good book to learn how to move on after a breakup
A nice book with advices about how to move on after a breakup, and the way you'll heal. What to do to meet new people and start a new loving life.
Published on 20 Nov. 2002


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86 of 86 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great ' first ' to turn to when the unimaginable happens., 13 May 2002
By A Customer
This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future: How to Learn from the Past for a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Paperback)
This was the first book to catch my eye in the bookstore when I found myself alone after over 20 yrs. of marriage and was utterly devestated.
It became my 'bible', beside my bed. I highlighted all the bits about how to create happiness in your life, reread them constantly.
Alot of the ideas about being responsible for creating your own happiness were new to me and I didn't immediately understand, it took some time. The chapters on 'what went wrong' were too painful initially, but the right time came and then they made sense too. The chapters on beginning a new relationship are as yet untested!
Since that time, over 2 yrs. ago, I've gone on to read books going into much greater depth on these issues, but this first one that I turned to, and still turn to, has a special place.
It was the turning point for me to look at my life in a completely different way, at what is important for me and what my values are(not my x partner's-not always that easy to work out after a long relationship).
I highly recommend this book, it covers a wide area, from before the break-up, to step-families in the new relationship; so I think that many people would want to expand their reading after this book. But it certainly inspired me to believe that there is a future. If your partner has left, or you have left them, you can make a good life; this book can certainly set you on the path.
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39 of 39 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Exellent guide for the newly separated/divorced, 9 Oct. 2001
By A Customer
This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future: How to Learn from the Past for a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Paperback)
Bought this book because I wanted a bit of a guide on how to deal with my two children after my husband and I divorced. He has moved about 200 miles away and I wanted some hints on how to "do it right" in relation to them being brought up in a newly single parent family. The book covers many aspects of moving on - The end of a relationship/Coming to terms with loss/What went wrong/The children/New social life/the introduction of a new partner ..... It explains how children of different ages view divorce and separation, and for those of you who do not have children I would still recommend it as it goes through many "relationship types" and how to avoid making the same mistakes again.
It is in my handbag and if I come across a problem I refer to it and it gives me confidence, comfort and courage to soldier on!
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Pretty good guide to getting through seperation, 18 Dec. 1999
By A Customer
There are sections on whether you really want to seperate, the grief process, becoming independent successfully and starting a new relationship. The section on 'What went wrong' really struck a chord. Best of all, the book is full of examples of real people who have gone through the pain and come out the other end. The section on self confidence was not too original but overall, this is a good read if you're still going through the mill.
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22 of 23 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great support, 15 Feb. 2002
By A Customer
This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future: How to Learn from the Past for a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Paperback)
I bought this book because I wanted to know that all my feelings were 'normal'. Sarah Litvinoff tells us that all those 'pinball emotions' are just that: normal!
This book gave me a lot of strength during a particularly devastating time - I thoroughly recommend it.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The best book on relationship breakdown recovery!, 4 Jan. 2010
By 
Maximilian Longhin (United Kingdom - or in the sky somewhere) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future: How to Learn from the Past for a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Paperback)
Do yourself a favour and read it. It will enlighten you on so many aspects and will enrich your life. I have been recommending this book since it helped me get over a really difficult relationship in 1994. So many of my friends & colleagues have benefitted from this book. Best of all, Sarah Litvinoff writes in an easy to understand way: there's no unnecessary jargon nor is the text oversimplified. Well-balanced and not at all preachy, evangelical or patronising. Whether it's a straight, gay or bi relationship you're coming out of, you will gain so much from this book.
Good luck and I hope it helps you on your journey.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Very Insightful and Resassuring, 31 Mar. 2011
By 
Jase (Staines, UK) - See all my reviews
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I downloaded this as a kindle book, and found it quite reassuring given the stage in life that I'm currently at. I'm having counselling at the moment and it's helped to put some of the issues that I've been discussing into much needed context. There are many real world examples used (obviously with names changes) to illustrate almost every point made. It may be a relatively quick read, but I can see myself going through it again soon too.

The only minor comment regarding the Kindle version, is that some of the formatting around the task sections is a little awry but that doesn't detract from its' usefulness!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars should have bought this earlier!!!!, 2 Dec. 2009
By 
The Auld Bat (Dundee, Scotland) - See all my reviews
This book is an excellent buy, wish I'd knowing about it earlier, before I'd split up. But hey ho onwards & upwards thanks to pointers & sugestion within this book. I reccommend everyone who's starting again to read this.
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12 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Support & understanding for pain/rejection at being dumped, 29 Jun. 2000
By A Customer
I kept asking myself how could I go on without my love and this showed me the stages relationships move through and how not to repeat the same mistakes. Only when I read this book did I start to come to terms with being dumped - my loneliness, betrayal, lack of confidence and lack of trust. It gave me something to build on. An excellent buy.
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5.0 out of 5 stars it does help, 9 Oct. 2012
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This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future: How to Learn from the Past for a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Paperback)
I've split with my fience and feel confused angry cos she left worried about her and shock. I got this book cos now I can use this single time to sort issues out I'm tired of having relationships break down after a year and its happened three times in a row now. Its helping to see the bigger picture and how breaking up affects both parties. It reads well is easy to follow iv only just started it but noticed tasks in it which I like Ie remember this time could you have...whatever. I like thus cos you can learn from your past exp. This makes the past or present experience a valuable learning tool as opposed to something to feel ashamed or sad about. Least I can use the pain to help me. I would reccommend this book.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great, supportive, 3 July 2014
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This review is from: The Relate Guide To Starting Again: Learning From the Past to Give You a Better Future: How to Learn from the Past for a Better Future (Relate Relationships) (Paperback)
Great, supportive, thorough. Go for it - first with the book to give you confidence and useful insights, and then in real life! :)
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