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45 Reviews
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71 of 77 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars truly inspirational and invaluable
Although I was not sexually abused as a child, I come from a household of extreme pysical and emotional abuse. My counsellor recommended this book to me because she thought that it would be useful to me in helping me understand about the complications and effects of secrecy, shame, trust, grief, sadness and also the ability to pick up the pieces and move on.She was right...
Published on 18 Sep 2003 by Nicky

versus
2.0 out of 5 stars Disappointing.
Many readers have found this book helpful. Others, like me, may be put off by the lack of solid evidence to substantiate the very sweeping claims about the consequences of experiencing childhood sexual abuse.

The authors seem to reason thus: if victims of childhood sexual abuse describe certain emotional problems, all women who have similar emotional problems...
Published 19 days ago by User201202


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6 of 9 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Reassuring, comforting & life changing., 14 Mar 2010
My Therapist lent me this book, which I found extremely helpful & comforting to read.
I've used this book as a part of my healing. Each chapter is the next
step to coping & moving on. I would highly recommend this book to all
survivors & I wish you all well in your journey.
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8 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Lifeline!, 28 Aug 2007
This book offers a wonderful insight into the healing process and has been an invaluable reference at different stages in my life. At times, when you'd rather shut everyone out, this book has helped support and guide me through the difficult and complex journey from victim to survivor.
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11 of 17 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Helping you to heal, 24 Aug 1999
By A Customer
Suddenly I was able to make sense of the feelings of despair, pain and sadness that had been spiralling me into deep depression. Finally I had the reason behind the self-hate, low self-esteem and need for control. The reason for "feeling" nothing and it wasn't my fault. I'm not fully healed yet, but with the help of this book, my councillor my sister (who was also abused) and some good friends, I'm starting to get there. If you've been sexually abused and you haven't healed yet, read this book.It won't be easy, but it will be worth it!
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5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars, 29 Oct 2014
Excellent content and quality
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5 of 9 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars a helpful, insightful, life affirming book, 28 Oct 2010
This book is written in an easy to understand format, and deals with a painful and horrifying subject kindly, supportively and very unambiguously. For the survivor, it covers all stages, and makes everything acceptable, thus removing the secrecy, shame and 'I thought it was just me....' feelings that survivors have.

I have found it invaluable on my journey, and would wholeheartedly recommend it for survivors as an essential way to be kind to yourselves, to partners as to how to help and to therapists as to how to help, due to its thorough and complete insight and practical and emotional guidance.
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3 of 6 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Good but could have been better, 17 Aug 2011
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This book is good at explaining a lot of feelings however can make you feel very depressed. Didn't read the whole thing as every time I did I felt overwhelming sadness. The personal stories are very hard going.
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0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Good, 3 April 2013
By 
B. Kay "UKCloudgazer" (Wirral, UK) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
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Bought for someone else who is finding it very good - best to use the work book that goes with it as well.
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0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars purchased as used, 24 Mar 2013
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like all similar types of books you have to be in the right frame of mind to pick the book up. but so far, for me, it has been worth it.
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4 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars excellent, 10 Nov 2009
By 
This book was very interesting... just a shame that my ex husband did not ever read it. I think it would have helped him a lot. I don't think I would have understood or got through some tricky times without having read this book to understand the pain experienced by someone that I loved
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0 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars The Courage To Heal, 22 July 2014
By 
Mr. A. Baron "a_baron" (England) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This is a review of the first edition, 1988. "The Courage To Heal..." is unquestionably one of the most pernicious, most dangerous books, ever written. If ever there was a case for banning a book it is this one rather than the usual political tracts. Here are two of my favourite quotes from it. Favourite? Yeah, right:

Page 81: "If you don't remember your abuse, you are not alone. Many women don't have memories, and some never get memories. This doesn't mean they weren't abused."

And

Page 82: "If you don't have any memory of it, it can be hard to believe the abuse really happened".

Yep, that's because it didn't happen. The reality is that today, for whatever reason, there are more psychologically disturbed people around than ever. With men this often results in violence, the traditional psychopath who attacks strangers at random, sometimes fatally. We've seen more than a few of those over the years, including serial murders and mass shootings.

Disturbed women generally direct their violence and self-destruction inwards.

Why these things are so, remains to be seen. Maybe it is that people who would have died young in an earlier era live long lives nowadays the same way paraplegics do. Maybe technology and the pace of change is driving us all mad. Maybe it's lead in the environment poisoning us. Whatever the reason, there are disturbed people whose fantasies and delusions are easily fed, including by therapists who try to convince them – often successfully – that the root cause of all their problems is the sexual and/or physical abuse they suffered in childhood. That is bad enough, but implanting false memories in mentally disturbed young women of strangers, neighbours, even their own fathers sexually abusing them is a whole new ball game. This book goes one step better than these therapists by enabling women to implant these memories themselves.

Psychologists have demonstrated this; if you don't have access to the academic literature, you will find videos of Elizabeth Loftus and others on YouTube explaining how this has been done with young children and how controlled experiments demonstrate how fluid human perception really is.

Such implanted false memories can be so convincing to the victim, to mental health professionals, to law enforcement and to juries that there have been many cases of (overwhelmingly) men being dragged through the courts and convicted of heinous but non-existent crimes. It should come as no surprise to informed persons that this book has become a favourite of "wimmin's studies" nor that both authors are lesbians.

If you are unable to read critically, don't read this book. If you are suffering from mental health issues, remember that most mental illnesses (so-called) are like most physical ones, self-limiting. Better to ride out the storm than seek "therapy" from the likes of Ellen Bass and Laura Davis which will only make the problem worse, could ruin your life, and may even kill you.
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