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macho no-brainer entertainment in ten easy moves/movies

Kelvin Dickinson
 
Armageddon [DVD] [1998]
Armageddon [DVD] [1998]
"if testosterone's your thing, then drink it up by the magnum with this deafening macho blockbuster. Male bonding has never been so scary"
Under Siege 2: Dark Territory [DVD] [1995]
Under Siege 2: Dark Territory [DVD] [1995]
"as dumb as they come from the big man with the tiny voice. Things get violent on board a train, then stay violent as he kicks every badass's ass into the middle of next week. Priceless entertainment"
Cliffhanger [DVD] [1993]
Cliffhanger [DVD] [1993]
"Stallone lets go when he shouldn't, loses a friend/regains a friend, then whips up an avalanche of retribution for the villian with the bad British accent"
Predator - Definitive Edition [DVD]
Predator - Definitive Edition [DVD]
"the non-extant 'Director's Cut' includes many fine examples of subtle characterisation from Schwarzenegger. Unusually, this has been eschewed here in favour of all-out action"
The Towering Inferno  [1975] [DVD] [1974]
The Towering Inferno [1975] [DVD] [1974]
"big spectacle and soap-opera from Irwin Allen. Steve McQueen & Paul Newman battle it out for top billing and you can almost feel the heat from their tortured brows, not to mention that model skyscaper"
Sammy Says Ouch [CASSETTE]
Sammy Says Ouch [CASSETTE]
"a nervous breakdown has never been this exciting"
Escape From New York [DVD]
Escape From New York [DVD]
"Snake lives to escape another day but this is his best get-out"
Judgement Night [DVD]
Judgement Night [DVD]
"unrelenting, scary, urban thriller...the atmosphere is electric, there's plenty of bloodshed and the bad guys are very bad indeed. Highly recommended"
The Incredibles (2-disc Collector's Edition) [DVD] [2004]
The Incredibles (2-disc Collector's Edition) [DVD] [2004]
"massively satisfying Disney film for men (as well as children, girls and women, dammit!)"
Team America: World Police [DVD]
Team America: World Police [DVD]
"outrageous piss-take of/homage to Gerry Anderson's classic 'Thunderbirds' series. Alarmingly watchable - and not difficult to imagine Gerry violently choking on his cigar the first time he saw it"