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The Other "A customer" (London)

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Steampunk Erotica
Steampunk Erotica
Price: £3.56

1.0 out of 5 stars Only part way through chapter two..., 26 Jun. 2013
This review is from: Steampunk Erotica (Kindle Edition)
And am bloody close to getting a refund. Only promising thing is its long enough to maybe get better. Total failure as steampunk (everything seems to run on 'electrostatic' which is basically just electricity after all, computers have software an monitors an keyboards, so....that's just normal then, no matter how much brass you plate it with) as erotica....Well, aside from silly exposition in its opening scene which flies from stripshow to names and dates backstory infodump then back in a paragraph, it also has magic corsets than seem to be confused with a bra, a room full of teenage girls who can be magically brought to orgasm (all with moisture an moans aplomb) merely by watching our heroine almost masturbate. She even appears to 'breathe through her labia' shortly before her silk underwear defies laws of physics and gets weaker when wet, tearing itself off. useless as underwear then. Speaking of physics, apparently venting steam down also produces downward thrust, and painting a bullet shaped zeppelin (German for airship natch it's the villains) black is the done thing, heat or aerodynamics be damned. Will force myself on as there's possibly a story under here. This author perhaps needed a very good editor more familiar with the basics of these things in the real world as well as history and the genres being attempted. Oh, and I agree with the other review...definitely not a female writer it seems so far.
Edit: Will be getting a refund. Was hoping it would be 'so bias worth reading to laugh at' but it's awful. Bike powered showers, electronics advanced enough to be totally impossible, 12 shot revolvers (they don't hold that many in the real world because it's basically impossible to be a revolver/handgun and be that big) really really bad characters and plot, and ...Well its two chapters without a shag so suddenly two characters 'abruptly want each other like they always had' which is about as bad as I could stand before giving it up. Bad erotica (I am not sure the author has actually had sex. ) Bad story, bad dialogue, badly written. You cannot brass plate badly written at and call it I steampunk. I could probably write better even on this backhanded kindle fire HD keyboard that is making writing this review almost as much of a chore as reading the book has been. But potential buyers beware, and author...you clearly have...a great passion. Go get the skill to match it, and a bit of knowledge please, then rewrite this. I might make it to the end of that version.


A Twisted Bard's Tale: (Erotic Lesbian Short)
A Twisted Bard's Tale: (Erotic Lesbian Short)
Price: £0.00

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Nope, 28 May 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Shakespeare himself would have liked a bawdy tale, but there is no tail here. Just one sex scene, mildly entertaining with almost no story to back it up, nor any real link to the original. Basically, Romeo's mum shags Juliet' s mum. That's it. The end. No story, bad grasp of Shakespearean english, and anachronistic corsetry. And some samples from Mr or Ms Kitt' s other sheet tremblers.


Star Trek: The Next Generation - Hive
Star Trek: The Next Generation - Hive
Price: £3.01

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Tripe, 24 May 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Variable artwork, some of decent quality, other bits clumsy, sexualized technofetishistic scenes that aren't integral to the story....and the story itself is terrible, plainly derivative from voyager episodes, totally ignores the characters history and motivations.....it seems almost designed by brags to contradict deliberately things done over in the novels, but has to ignore film and tv canon just as much to do so. Picard and Vash? Really? After all this time? Seven returning to the Borg? A character named Kira Archer just to get some names in? I am considering getting a refund on this even at 2 pounds, it's genuinely offensively bad, even misogynistic


The Istanbul Puzzle
The Istanbul Puzzle
Price: £2.99

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Quite good..., 10 May 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Very episodic, with cliffhanger chapter endings. Loses its rhythm towards end, and a few things are unclear or unresolved, and not in a way that makes you think 'that's for a later story then'. Things are a little cliche heavy, but enjoyable, and a lot of research has gone in, as the small tourist guide at end shows.


Fascinating Facts About Classic Movies
Fascinating Facts About Classic Movies
Price: £2.32

0 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Interesting, 17 Mar. 2013
While it's entirely possible to cull similar facts from IMDB, particularly on the Kindle Fire I read this on, this made me realise (or more accurately, remember) the advantage of books like this. On the internet, or even in DVD commentaries, you have to go and look for the information, or choose to hear it. In this the information reminds you of the film. You can go from Thelma and Louise to Titanic in less than a second. You begin thinking about the stars, the Oscars, the process and history of film, even from disparate movies as those in this book. (Movies not films, this book is very Hollywood centric) Also, reading is faster than hearing or seeing, and this book made me pine for those old days of half-publicity 'Making Of' magazines, and film novelisations, where you absorb the facts without dozing off watching a DVD extra. Reading this book made me replay bits of the film in my head, and almost rekindled my love for cinema, and American cinema beyond genre films, that has been dead for over a decade now. As it stands, it made me remember when Hollywood was good, cgi a new thing and a tool not a reason, when actors were Stars, and lit a room, and when the American Dream was sprinkled over a film rather than cynical or betrayed by the real world. Surprising, for what is literally a bunch of IMDB style trivia, arranged alphabetically, some already well known. The credit for this must come down to the writers selections, largely academy award winners.


The Happy Ending
The Happy Ending

1.0 out of 5 stars Naff, 5 Mar. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: The Happy Ending (Kindle Edition)
Just a lil shock story/ chapter. Largely exists as marketing for longer novel, hence free. The author can clearly write, and perhaps banks on stereotypes and expectations from the cover, but mostly ends up spreading other, distasteful stereotypes with this extract. Perhaps a complete short story would have done a better job.


Dune (The Dune Sequence Book 1)
Dune (The Dune Sequence Book 1)
Price: £4.49

4.0 out of 5 stars Perhaps not the legend as reputed, 23 Feb. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
But enoyable. Odd to read it now when familiarity with islamic terms is more commonplace, and the alien culture rendered less alien.


Sex with the Warrior Princess: A Roleplay Erotica Story
Sex with the Warrior Princess: A Roleplay Erotica Story
Price: £0.99

1.0 out of 5 stars Meh, 18 Feb. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Badly laid out, thoughtless in story, not that story was its point, but even the sex was badly written. Admittedly I only downloaded it for a giggle, and its synopsis gave me a laugh.Seriously though, this is functional at best. I think the description of the food may have aroused more senses thn the sex scenes. Shame. Could have been fun.


2DArtist(Kindle Tablet Edition)
2DArtist(Kindle Tablet Edition)
Price: £0.00

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars potential fraud, 25 Jan. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
the ' free trial' offer appears to result in an instant billing for a 25 quid annual subscription, which then fails, meaning no issue to read, no free trial, and potentially a large chunk of cash gone unwillingly from my bank account . I will be cjecking my balance in the morning, and contacting amazon if need be . A shame, as the magazine itself looks interesting .


ScreenDim Full
ScreenDim Full
Price: £0.63

3 of 5 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars no longer works, 18 Jan. 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: ScreenDim Full (App)
Brightness control no longer works on kindle fire hd. Worked fine for about a week, now a waste of money and am back to lighting up room reading at night.


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