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TooFullToWrite "I've started so I'll finish"

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New Reality: Truth
New Reality: Truth
Price: 2.56

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An exciting new series and that's the truth, 28 Jun 2014
I received a free copy of the book in return for an honest review.

Michael has come out with an amazingly thought provoking series. There is so much raw power and entertainment in this episode alone that I am hooked for future episodes. This will be right up the street of anyone who enjoys high brow Sci-Fi concepts, particularly around gaming. Bloody brilliant.

Teeth (Crash Book 0)
Teeth (Crash Book 0)
Price: 0.00

5.0 out of 5 stars A Review of Teeth, a short story set in The Crash universe, 12 Jan 2014
This is a slice of terror that takes you into the grim, distributing, dystopian world of Crash (Book One).

Michael has written a side story that plays with the concept of The Tooth Fairy, reimagining him in a modern day battle scarred, bleak society as a demented madman to be feared rather than be revered.

This story also contains the first chapter of Crash (Book One).

There is a formidable amount of foreboding that this short story spans and the desperation of the characters is hinted at. However, nothing will prepare them fully for what comes next - it is the calm before the storm and after this the world will never be the same again.

I've read Crash and it is fun to see other characters pop up in this world and how they interact with it, piecing together how they are linked to the original story. More please Michael!

Darker Side of Night
Darker Side of Night
by HastyWords
Edition: Paperback
Price: 5.57

5.0 out of 5 stars A Review of Darker Side of Night by Hastywords, 3 Jan 2014
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This review is from: Darker Side of Night (Paperback)
This is an electric debut by the prolific poet Hastywords.

It is an impressive collection of prose around the themes of monsters/demons that we face in our lives and how we deal with these emotional issues.

There are a variety of flows amongst these pieces, all of them stunningly arranged and orchestrated to perfection. All of them are a pleasure to read and contain a lot of heart and courage, which is fundamentally what draws people into her world and keeps them fascinated, enthralled and hungry to read more.

It is a very consistent collection and I for one am looking forward to reading her next anthology - this is essential for any fan of quality poetry.

by David Barry
Edition: Paperback
Price: 9.79

5.0 out of 5 stars A review of Muscle by David Barry, 26 Dec 2013
This review is from: Muscle (Paperback)
Muscle happens to be a very apt title for this book.

I found this novel to be a taut, lean, very entertaining read that does not have an ounce of fat on its bones and is indeed all pure muscle!

The title refers to a gentleman called Freddie Weston and how he supplies doormen to a number of prestigious (and not so savoury) clubs in London. Freddie provides the "muscle" to these establishments and some of these bouncers have dodgy connections themselves, exposing Freddie to their nefarious activities through the course of the story. Freddie himself is troubled by both the untimely death of his Father and a fierce dedication to his family that threatens all of their lives when he starts to call upon and allow himself to be manipulated by the seedy gangsters that inhabit his world. It then falls on him to figure out how to deal with these problems, without crossing the line and becoming as bad as the criminals themselves.

David Barry writes with warmth and humour which transcends genre, he has an engaging style that made the characters very real for me and I developed empathy for them. From Freddie's gin soaked Mother, to the plight of his troublesome teenage daughter Jackie and his unemployed old war buddy Bill, all of them were well realised and contributed finely to the nuances of the plot.

I admire the attention to detail regarding the references to London towns and locations in Kent, which gives this tale an authentic touch and local colour/flavour.

Regarding the length, I initially thought it looked short coming in at just under two hundred pages but trust me, this packs a wallop and is stuffed to the gills with great twists, clever dialogue and deft handling of the subject matter - highly recommended.


In the Name of Science
In the Name of Science
Price: 0.77

5.0 out of 5 stars This guy really knows how to write and now I'm scared to eat steak, 8 Oct 2013
This is another terrific story from the pen of Michael Robertson.

It is very engaging and I thoroughly enjoyed the characterisation - the initial main protagonist was very creepy but well defined and totally believable. There was a delicious undercurrent of dark humour laced within this story to complement the driving narrative of the horror theme. I never thought the description of someone eating a meal could be both so unpleasant and harrowing!
(And it takes a lot to put me off my food, let me tell you)

The reveal half way through the story between the characters was well thought out too. Wonderful descriptions and knowing winks to the horror genre too - we know that something bad is going to happen and this is shown in such a way that when it does come, it is unexpected, as Michael skillfully holds back on the severity of the outcome until it is too late for the characters to do anything about it.

I raced through this story on the coach back home - it is short but taut too, it flowed really well and left me wanting more. Michael has taken a familiar theme but made it completely original and to his credit, this is yet another jewel in his literary crown. He is an amazing writer that is worth following, his style just keeps getting better and better, as evidenced by his current novella Crash, which I also enjoyed (and was so compelling I had to read it in an afternoon - he is really nailing the Thriller aspect in his work).

Very highly recommended - I hope that he develops it into a longer story in the future.

Crash (Book One)
Crash (Book One)
Price: 0.00

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Review of Crash by Michael Robertson, 28 Jun 2013
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This review is from: Crash (Book One) (Kindle Edition)
I read this book in one sitting. It was truly relentless.

Once you start, you really won't be able to stop. I genuinely felt anxious for the characters and I had to keep going because their plight seemed so real and plausible that I simply had to know how each new chapter was going to unfold as soon as possible.

Yes, there is graphic violence in this book but it is superbly described and executed to flawless perfection. I felt like I was literally in a horror movie and forced to sit alongside the protagonists, as they contemplate how despicable the antagonists are and how bleak their situation is, yet they still keep fighting and never giving up hope, despite the chaos of the world unfolding around them.

The dynamic between the Father and son really made me feel empathy for Chris and I also love how his son is called Michael too.

To witness how the world changes Chris and how he interacts with his son, you kind of watch it in bemused terror as each new development unfolds. This story was told with panache - each revelation of back story provides temporary relief before the next layer of tension kicks in resulting in a wonderfully paced read.

There are comedic elements in this story, which lighten its harrowing tone, bigoted sentiments of Chris's boss and Chris's wife also seemed perfectly realised and seemed both hauntingly familiar yet starkly original.

Michael reminds me of Charlie Higson, as he writes fresh metaphors and deftly handles both the explosive impact of the violence, whilst punctuating it all with humorous moments of brevity.

Michael deserves a ton of attention for this debut and I simply cannot wait for the next one, I am sure that you will feel the same - highly recommended.

Price: 0.77

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Review of Perspective by Will Louison, 17 Feb 2013
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This review is from: Perspective (Kindle Edition)
Perspective - a novel that changes its perspective throughout the book, as you delve further into it.

This novel is about a group of people who find themselves stranded with memory loss and as they try to understand why they are in this predicament, they have to deal with other unknown forces at work in the background.

I felt a deep emotional connection to the protagonists in this book and I genuinely was intrigued to find out more about their pasts and how they were going to cope with the future.

Will has a great way of introducing the characters and their names in a cute, creative and engaging manner that really endeared me to them. When violence ultimately ensues later in the story, it is all the more sad and tragic because of how well Will deals with what is happening to his cast.

I was impressed by the graphic, dynamic nature of what was going on, Will has a keen sense of action and a good grasp of intricately developing the horror of the situation. It grips you firmly and takes you on the ride that the characters are experiencing.

It has been mentioned that the book needs a bit of polishing up, to me there were a few instances of past/present tense that could be ironed out but I did not feel that this merited the deduction of a star, hence the five star review.

Will has an original story here that develops very well and naturally unfolds nicely - if you are a Sci-Fi fan then this is well worth your time if you want to experience a fresh, exciting young author with his take on the genre.

I can see great potential in Will - I cannot wait to read more of his works, I can really see him going from strength to strength.

An auspicious debut - highly recommended.

The Shaft Of The Devil (A Laugh-Out-Loud Erotic Parody)
The Shaft Of The Devil (A Laugh-Out-Loud Erotic Parody)
Price: 1.99

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Guest Review - The Shaft of the Devil - the return of Mr @50Cakes, lock up your daughters, particularly if they are bakers!, 10 Dec 2012
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Mr @50cakes - utter those words in a crowded room and you will wish you held on to your Krispy Kreme Donut a little more tightly, along with bringing a restraining order to the party.

I promised him that if he was good, he could have a copy of Evangelista's follow up to the incredibly salaciously erotic and stupendously funny "The Shaft of the Ruffian" to snuggle down with to review, in between the sheets and baking sessions, which for him usually take place simultaneously.

The time has now come for him to deliver on this promise - he has finished every morsel and is very satisfied with himself indeed.

Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado - live, from a bakery that if it was any more erotic, it could be used concurrently as a sauna and industrial steam press, we go to the old devilish rascal himself once more, take it away Mr @50Cakes:-

"Hello, good evening to you all, it's good to be back in the saddle once again, thank you TooFullToWrite for allowing me to triumphantly return like the King of Puddings and as for your usual fee, the Chouquette is in the mail, ahahahahahaha! ("TooFullToWrite:- Again?! You said I'd get cash this time. Mr @50Cakes:- Oh alright, look come back later, people are watching. I'll also throw in a free Belgian Bun. Pedant).

Now.....where to begin with The Shaft of the Devil.

It is a sequel times two in every sense and shape of the word - twice the fun, adventure, comedy, horror, eroticism - it exists in its own genre in the realms of erotidy (patent pending).

Like a pack of twin Belgian eclairs, it comes thrusting at you with everything it has got and leaves you lusting for more, more, more!

There was so much girl on girl saucy action that I thought I would melt into a puddle of icing, which incidentally occurred in a terrific dream that I had where I was being smeared all over a lovely soft voluptuous cakey Madammmmmmohhhhyummers (TooFullToWrite:- Snap out of it 50! My mother is coming round for tea and you promised to bake her something. Let's hustle!)

The lead protagonist Stephanie Harley-Blackthorne has decided to get herself involved in graphic exhibitionism (hilarious), BDSM(anism)(ropey), orgies (Romanesque) and public transportationism (dirtily decadent yet somehow modernly quaint!)

You have to admire her willingness to indulge in other cultures and customs in such an enthusiastically lascivious manner - kind of reminds me of my continental conquests from the van down the road. I was so enthralled with Stephanie's lust for her Japanese cohort that I had to break away from my usual fare and indulge in sushi and red bean cake for a good twenty minutes - incredible!

This book is dangerously erotic and should come with a public health warning; thank heavens for the frequent humorous interludes that help to delay the inevitable climax from coming too soon, just like when I use a baby spoon instead of dessert spoon - breaking it down into little bites leading to the nail biting, body rocking, popping the lock off and slam dunking the funky chunky loving into a grand sexy finale :)

In conclusion, a fabulous read - give yourself a good shafting, you'll love it!

Should get ten stars, all made of marzipan and chocolate!"

Ok thank you Mr @50Cakes, now can someone please give him his mild buttercream sedative again - I don't want him frightening my mother like last time, it took her forever to get that custard stain out of her cardigan.

Thank you Evangelista for another thoroughly original, funny and steamy novella - heartily recommended for fans great comedy writing, Fifty Shades and 50 Sheds of Grey alike.

The Shaft of the Ruffian (A Laugh-Out-Loud 50 Shades Parody)
The Shaft of the Ruffian (A Laugh-Out-Loud 50 Shades Parody)
Price: 1.99

1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Shaft of the Ruffian - Guest Review (Mr @50cakes is in the pantry), 25 Nov 2012
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I bought this for my very good friend on Twitter (Mr @50Cakes).

Mr Cakes is no stranger to the world of 50 Shades of Grey (yes, he knows he is going to hell and he'll be seeing you there too but for different reasons) and I thought he would enjoy this immensely, which he did indeed (he's a bit excitable, he had to be sedated with a big Belgian Eclair and a drip chock full of buttercream icing sugar right afterwards).

This is what he had to say about one of the greatest and funniest pieces of erotic comedy literature he has read in quite some time or possibly ever - so without further ado, take it away 50, you old rascal you!

"Thank you TooFullToWrite for that magnificent introduction, you could give Movie Trailer Guy a run for his pennies!

I must say that this excellent novella stimulated me no end! My G-Spot quivered for quite some time before, during and afterward (that's Gob Spot, I haven't guffawed and spluttered so much since I discovered the joys of Pound Cake - I certainly gave that one a good seeing to!)

The joy of this book is the vividly painted characters and the over the top nature of the sexuality that exudes from the premise.

The villains were dangerous but supremely sexy, the heroine was like a hot molten volcano of chocolate fudge cake and the climaxes came faster and more often than an episode of Last of the Summer Wine (if Last of The Summer Wine was actually the TV series 24).

Shaft of the Ruffian has class, style, charisma, deliciously sweet earth moving metaphors, the best use of the word 'moistness' in the historical canon of erotic fiction and sheer balls to the wall sexiness (if the protagonist had balls but of course she doesn't, she has luscious orbs of delight, wonderful baps that cry out to the reader......oh no, it's happening again - 'Marjorie! Get the pop up eclair book quick, I feel an episode coming on!')

A few hours later....

"Where was I? Mmmmmmm caramelly. Right, pull myself together. This novella enters a 50 Shades of Grey world and infuses it with such humorous colour, texture and flavour that you won't feel well and truly shafted afterwards, just immensely satisfied and wanting more, like I always do.

(And there's a sequel! Squeeee! - I'm gearing up for that too, normally my equipment can cope giving her a really good shafting but I'll need all of my strength for this one, come here you luscious little Belgian you...)"

Thank you Mr @50Cakes for that wonderfully succinct summary. To be honest if you can get him talking about anything than cakes for more than five seconds, you've made an impression, so well done Evangelista, we look forward to sampling your other wares real soon!

David (TooFullToWrite)

Not Well
Not Well
by Jamie Curtis Baker
Edition: Paperback
Price: 3.70

5.0 out of 5 stars Not Well? Not Half!, 23 Sep 2012
This review is from: Not Well (Paperback)
Jamie Curtis Baker has written something pretty amazing.

I started out reading this book and being enthralled at the driving narrative, superb prose (there's always superb prose in work like this :) in-joke) and the way that you felt incredibly sorry for the protagonist, his dead end job and dreary existence.

About two thirds of the way through, the novella took a very dark turn and I raced through the final pages to get to the gripping end, having purposefully taking my measured time up until this point.

I currently work in an office myself and was particularly amused to find myself crying out "My left shoe also squeaks like that too! What are the chances of that?!"

I can totally relate to some of the experiences felt, as they are very well described and universal in their nature.

This book has a cynical slant which had me chuckling frequently about the attitude of the character to his co-workers and people are right in saying that there are times when you can totally relate to the character if you have worked or are working in an office.

Very well done Jamie, fantastic work and I look forward to reading more of your future material.

Not Well

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