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Mr. R. Porter "KINDLE" (UK)

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Aliens Colonial Marines - Limited Edition (Xbox 360)
Aliens Colonial Marines - Limited Edition (Xbox 360)
Price: £4.85

1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I say we nuke the entire game from orbit!, 23 Jan 2014
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars 
After news hit the streets, Randy Pitchford sulked online; threatening fans who had been ripped off with being blocked. Then came the press interview where updates were announced. In this interview, we get to experience the personality of this man. If I had caused this much solicitude & agony amongst fans, I would have apologized, revealed the exceptional circumstances for this calamity, & made a plea to reassure fans that something like this will never happen again. But instead, he insists on maintaining his delusion for this game's supposed success. He sits there in a tasteless colourful shirt; sebaceous, smirking & bragging about his own jokes that were considered flippant the first time round. We begin to get a picture of what it must be like to work for this man. Similar to the environment surrounding another deluded manager with the second name Lucas, the staff must have been mislead to their fate. This man sabotaged Aliens CM in order to make Bored of Lands his pet project & appease his shareholders no doubt. I've worked with people with similar makings. They are intimidated by those whose talent & skill far exceeds their own; surrounding themselves with sewage so that their own waste doesn't seem so bad. They smile when they lie. They think their jokes rock! They don't take & learn from criticism at all, but take it as a personal attack - further wedging them inside themselves! They are so self concerned that they seldom deviate from telling everyone around them they are "doing a great job", in order to have a good repore with people.. usually people with the same infliction. Any critique is considered 'negativity' & all burning ambition is immediately abated; all desire to progress development & perfect one's skills dilapidated; resulting in a team of lackadaisical reprobates with no baring on the main goal, & no standards to live up to. The stunning progress the previous team accomplished obviously fell on deaf ears, & I can just imagine this guy saying to himself.. "I can do much better than this. I'll start again tomorrow."
The disaster that can evolve over night when merging 2 dev teams however, is the ramification of the question of inherent discipline. One team has learnt from mistakes, the other is denying mistakes exist. Each have a claim to superiority, & on this occasion, the reins were handed in the wrong direction. And during the interregnum, a great game was lost.

The argument of this game's quality is futile. It's a painful experience playing something you know was a better game at one stage in its protracted & somewhat addled history. So any enjoyment is capitulated & you'd rather just put this disastrous chapter out of your memory as soon as possible.

Twinings Assam 50's (Pack of 4, Total 200 Tea Bags)
Twinings Assam 50's (Pack of 4, Total 200 Tea Bags)
Price: £9.00

5.0 out of 5 stars Sh'azzam!, 6 Oct 2013
Twinings have hit GOLD with this one! Seriously! This is a special Tea.

Ok, it's a well known fact that British people tend to stick to the usual commercial brand they grew up on either because they have tried their friends god awful Peppermint Tea, or they are afraid to try a new Tea encase they get home & discover they have the infamous "Smokey" one! (Lapsang)

There are so many teas now. And apart from Earl Grey & English Breakfast, no one knows what they taste like. And unless they taste exactly like the current big brand.. it's always a "Yuk"! But this Tea is different.

Let me explain. It happens slowly. You buy a box of 50, & you try it. It tastes nothing like the Citrus Flowers of Earl Grey! Nothing like the Curry Syrup of Chai! Nor the slightly bitter easy going but high caffeine content of English Breakfast. It just tastes good. But wait! You get to the end of the box, you aren't particularly impressed with it, & go back to the 500 pack of round tea bags with the 2 old men on the front! That's when it suddenly hits you! It just doesn't cut it any more! There's no bite, no warmth to the flavour, no depth to the after taste, all the subtly & sophistication has gone! You notice the thick sludge around the edges of the cup, & how fast it turns everything brown! You become depressed, loose your job, the wife leaves, & your children disown you. Your car doesn't start, so you decide to walk to the shops instead. Upon arriving you notice the change has slipped out of the hole in your pocket, & you end up begging the man across the counter to let you have this box of rather over priced pretentious tea... He looks at you with unwavered solicitude & pops the receipt in the bag.

By the time your foot is in the door; the kettle is already boiling. You crack open the box, which splits in all the wrong places except the seams which were designed to do so, & brew 2 tea bags in a pot for precisely as long as it takes you to wash your big mug out & put sugar in it!
The moment you sit down in your arm chair & begin to sip the tea, your wife & children waltz back in & hand you a spark plug, a paycheck & utter something about fools in the month of April! And all is well again!


Gears of War: Judgement (Xbox 360)
Gears of War: Judgement (Xbox 360)
Offered by NextDayEntertainment
Price: £10.95

7 of 9 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars ...And they all live happily ever after!, 6 Oct 2013
= Fun:2.0 out of 5 stars 
1 game without Fenix, & we miss him already! This tells you that something is very wrong with this title!

When? Who?
First off, this was meant to be a prequel. So this sets off continuity mistakes, such as the line in GOW1 "These guys are almost as big as you Cole" to which he replies "Yeah.. Almost!" which is a clear acknowledgement of a new enemy - Boomers. But everything is in this game, & more. It doesn't make any sense. That's the first problem with Prequels. The other issue that strikes me as being odd is how dumbed down Cole & Baird are, even though they are younger, more rebellious, full of profanities & have a general hatred against authority. You know! How we all are when we are young! But these characters are dull, dead, forgettable & bare no resemblance to the characters we fell in love with 1-3.

No emotion.
The Story is where it hurts you. We all developed a connection to these characters. This is war, we share their pain, we witness their struggle, and we take pity on the vestige of the life they have left; to fight. Even Marcus, the stoic stolid rock of a man we first met was reduced to a dejected mess by the end of the 3rd game. The contrasts of that alone is enough to bring a tear out! But here? This game? We're barely going through the motions. Instead of staying alive, sneaking around, going on an all out vengeance vendetta, & having an emotional response to the game's story, you are "Ticking Boxes" for awards, stars, & points! This forces you to restart as soon as anything bad happens, & you totally loose all will to live in real life!

Plays like a Slug!
Active reloads are sluggish, grenades are compulsory, restarting can loose you all your guns.. All 2 of them! Pistols are pointless now, as are most of the old weapons that have been deliberately down graded to make way for the new super weapons they were obviously so proud of! Every mission usually throws everything at you. There's no narrative, so it's like playing multi-player on your own, where smaller enemies kill you easier than large stronger ones! (Go figure!) You get killed during executions, but not during sentry reload! (Go figure!) You don't get killed via team frag, but you do from your own frag! The whole thing is a mess.
The extra Declassified Challenges are a disaster too. You either throw your guns away, or rush through the level on timer, or some other pointless additive, or just accept that at the end of the level, you are going to get an annoying 1 or 2 out of 3 star reward. It doesn't matter to the story, I know! But it makes it feel that way!

Diamond in the rough.
There's 1 reason to get this, & that is for "Aftermath". This extra linear story goes back to the wining formula & yields more character subtlety in 1 hour's play, than the entire game does with multi-player & Judgement put together. This small venture is in fact so ingenious that I think the main Dev team had nothing to do with it.
Playing it Co-op split screen brings back the good old times when friends used to actually meet up & play a game together in the same room. Sociable, fun, & casual. Not everyone has the time to devote to online obsessions!

All the Gears of War games were larger than life. They were set pieces to look at with their massive scale & endless backdrops. Truly breathtaking in certain instances. Judgement feels like the opposite. You enter rooms 1 by 1, fight everything in waves, cut-scene of opening a door, blah blah blah from Loomis.. Something about Icecream.. On to the next room!! There's just 2 instances where the game tried to look big: The city under siege "We all had friends there", & the Lightmass after decay "We should have been out there fighting". The rest feels very claustrophobic.

Oh look at the little bugs!
Detail is something I cannot get enough of. Those tiny details is what tells me the dev team loved this like their baby. You could cut furniture up in the first game. Shooting the little Red Pods down in the second game was fun too! The third one had detail so refined that I often go back to find more subtlety! There's even a song about how Chairman Prescott ditch them playing at a certain point in the game! Yeh! I notice these things! But once again, Judgement? You can't smash boxes, you can't shoot & break lanterns, & funny how the candles are made of GLASS! Yes, they really rushed this out.

If you're going to play it, first disconnect all expectations you have from the GOW games. Because this is a bad imitation for those who just want mindless violence, which any game can offer to be honest. There will never be another Gears of War game. A game so different you actually forget it's just a game at times.

Games developers need to takes this as a lesson. Take games more seriously. Gamers aren't stupid! Give them a product you expect to sell.. They will reject it. Give them an experience so moving it stays with them for ever.. They will fall in love with it.
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Nov 27, 2013 4:16 PM GMT

Komputerbay 1GB (2x 512MB) PC133 SDRAM 133MHz DIMM - Limited Compatibility
Komputerbay 1GB (2x 512MB) PC133 SDRAM 133MHz DIMM - Limited Compatibility
Offered by KOMPBAY
Price: £10.00

5.0 out of 5 stars HIGH QUALITY, 2 Jan 2013
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
I've been having problems with the RAM I bought for my Fantom Synthesizer, so decided to replace the RAM stick. So glad I did. My samples load fast & never glitch up now. For the money, this is a steal! And you get 2, so I have a spare for the future! Highly recommend. Decent seller.

Logitech LS1 Laser Mouse - Grape Flash Acid
Logitech LS1 Laser Mouse - Grape Flash Acid
Price: £12.99

5.0 out of 5 stars Danger Mouse Standards!, 27 Jun 2012
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
There's not much you can say about a mouse! But this one is a particularly rare find! Who ever designed this did over time! It's so sleek & comfortable. Responsive to the extreme; I had to reduce the Mouse-Pointer speed in control panel! The wheel is particularly good! Not only is it smooth as fresh coffee but it has an extra 2 directional (Left & Right) click functions you can use.
It's such a pleasure to use from my old analog one & the weight is perfectly balanced too. It's not too heavy, not too light & frail either! The buffed shine plastic bends down into the click dip with finger weighted accuracy so that you never accidentally click the right button & double clicking is now an art form it seems!

For the price, this is a steal! Logitech have pleased this customer!

Doctor Who - The Krotons [DVD] [1968]
Doctor Who - The Krotons [DVD] [1968]
Dvd ~ Patrick Troughton
Price: £6.50

5 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars If you're worried that this is another "Dominators" - Think Again!, 9 May 2012
When it comes to Patrick Troughton Stories, one has to let go of all expectations. We all know that the budget was appalling & so we had to have some cheap & standard Whos' to get some really adventurous ones earlier on in the season. But the Krotons whilst looking relatively cheap & even dull at times, comes off as an enjoyable & worth while underdog! How? Allow me to explain!

First off, it's not a sharp script as such, even though it is Bob Holmes's 1st. But this is a perfect example of "Troughton" 60's atmosphere. It's safe to say that early Dr Who is the most authentic. The Sounds, the cast, the pace, the acting, sets, etc. are all perfected to such an extent that every Troughton story has this potent ambience that seems to seep out of your screen, into your living room! The Krotons is no exception! In fact, I would say that apart from the Cybermen stories & The Mind Robber, this has a profusion of that priceless atmosphere.

What makes a special show isn't expensive sets, Sterile CGI FX, Super-Stars, & constant action. (Epic this, Epic that!) What makes these originals so special is the many subtleties; the little details; that which you only notice upon multiple re-watches. And that is all part of its charm! There's never a person in the background out of character. There's always a distant hum or vibration that you never notice directly. There's always plenty to look at when it comes to creative solutions; whereby an everyday object has been used in an innovative way! Like the Hockey Practice balls on the cyber costumes! Dr Who has so much re-watch value, charm & subtlety! And is detrimentally absent in the impostor show of today.

If you understand this fundamental issue, you will fall in love with this story. Like so many others; it gets better each time you watch it!

"Zoe, I think we may have gone & done it"!
Comment Comments (6) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Jul 9, 2012 9:15 PM BST

Doctor Who - The Sun Makers [DVD] [1977]
Doctor Who - The Sun Makers [DVD] [1977]
Dvd ~ Tom Baker
Offered by Leisurezone
Price: £9.28

11 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars They're not allowed sunlight! It's far too good for them!, 5 Sep 2011
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Yes, the acting is hammy & not taken seriously in the slightest, but what do you expect from a Tom Baker Story!
I know.. Not all of Tom's are like that. But this one certainly is! In fact, It's like watching something more like Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy or Monty Python!

If like me, you are interested in Politics, you'll love this story for it's satirical humour & blatant disregard for Bureaucracy! All aimed at mocking the system! Bob Holmes never ceases to amaze me with lines like "These Taxes.. They are like Sacrifices?" Asks Leela. "Sort of, only paying Taxes is more painful!"
There are lots of little things in there that make this a very entertaining story. Of course, the children wouldn't have ever cottoned on, but this isn't meant just for children. (You hear me me Moffat?!)

Contrast is met with confined studio shots, & capacious film & location material. As well as a balance of tongue in cheek humour, pugnacious violence & horror. Who ever thought of being "Steamed" to prolong the pain of death to satisfy the villain's nefarious thirst for torture of his victims, has a sick mind. But an innovative one! (Ever heard of that word Moffat!)

The word for today's story is "Avarice", & everyone is obsessed with monies! This worryingly bares resemblance to today's predicament, what with the constant fear of recession & the collapse of the euro.

This story isn't one of the more memorable ones sure, but that's not to say that it can't entertain you from start to finish. There are many good moments in here like the hilarious initial meeting of the Doctor & the Gather; all that talk of raspberry leaves & earth's departure or what ever. The point is they play off each other just perfectly! It's K9's first proper outing. Leela shows her propensity for violence & has some great lines like "Touch me again, & I'll fillet you" & "Before I die, I'll see this rat hole ankle-deep in blood... That is a promised thing". Leela really saves the day in this one, & is such a joy to watch. (Unlike companions now)

A Good Doctor Who story doesn't need to be epic, action packed, sexed up, frenetic, romantic, historic, & what ever else you can throw in there to attract as many viewers as possible. And this little number proves it. It's a charming, cosy, well written, even paced, entertaining little trouble maker of a story! One that I have frequented on many occasions. And due to its re-watch value, it's a story I shall be visiting again. (Thank goodness its lastability isn't cut short due to the entire story relying on a twist at the end or something! Especially one that doesn't make sense.. Ever..)

"Perhaps everyone runs from the Taxman!" - Leela
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Jan 27, 2014 3:57 PM GMT

Doctor Who - Day of the Daleks [DVD] [1972]
Doctor Who - Day of the Daleks [DVD] [1972]
Dvd ~ Jon Pertwee
Price: £6.50

8 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Thank you Brigadier for that timely intervention!, 26 Aug 2011
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
When it comes to Doctor Who, everyone seems to be fixated on CGI effects & Daleks Voices. For those people, they will watch it solely for those pointless moments that stick out like a soar thumb, much not unlike those sequences in Star Wars the Special Edition.

For the rest of us who know better, we shall watch it for everything else! The Story is clever, the script tight & sharp, & the actors all seem to perform perfectly; like they understand the main aspect of Dr Who - that it's NOT really just for children. They take all the parts seriously.
Most of all, beloved Jon who played his part with such conviction that you find yourself forgetting that it's not real! Oh! And the Ogrons are hilarious!

It's shot like they had 6 months to spare. And everything is organised very well. The Music is just so iconic, innovative, characteristic, and expressive, & quite literally enables the atmosphere to emanate from your home cinema system into your home to captivate you from start to finish! It's wonderful! And a big reminder of just how much is lacking from the new rubbish with it's epic over the top orchestrated trope, that is absent of any delicate or subtle sculpted sounds that allowed even dull scenes to be interesting; so the pace could unfold accordingly.

Speaking of which, the pace is some of the best in the shows history. There's this scene where the Doctor gets his bearings outside (in the future), & hides behind a brick wall from a patrol of Ogrons. The whole scene for me really is the best part in the Story. No Dialog, No Action, No Quick Frenetic Edits, or EPIC nonsense! The whole scene is carried purely on Jon's Body Language, the BBC Radiophonic Workshop's Sounds & Score, & Camera work you'd expect to see in a film by Ridley Scott or someone. It really is a Masterpiece at times.

If you can look deeper than the surface, you will discover something truly close to perfection. And Doctor Who (the Real series I mean) is famous for having plenty of depth. This title is no exception.

If you are a follower of the new series, stay away from Day of the Daleks. The Dalek Voices are not good enough & the FX are old & dated. And I doubt it's within you to look deeper, being used to Moffat's Checklist Trite.

Fellow Whovians, you've all no doubt watched this about 20 times already! You know that the DVD of this is worth another 20! :-D

"A touch sardonic but not cynical!"
Comment Comments (3) | Permalink | Most recent comment: May 29, 2012 6:28 PM BST

The Wild [DVD]
The Wild [DVD]
Dvd ~ Steve Williams
Offered by streetsahead
Price: £4.74

1 of 3 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Walt Disney did this?, 10 Jun 2010
This review is from: The Wild [DVD] (DVD)
Walt Disney used to be a Respectable company. They gave us Swiss Family Robinson, Return to OZ, Lion King & many other Classics. This is not one of them.

They just poured money into this calamity it seems. It really is bad. If I didn't know any better, I'd say that Russell T. Davies wrote it. Yeh! It's THAT bad!

It's a shame though because there are many parts in this Film that could have given us the Low Dark Strings, Black Humour & some scary scenes. But No. Light Hearted Gay Music all the way through, annoying frantic characters that just don't stop, uninspired Story with mindless Moral to it & a complete lack of scenes to make you laugh. In a Word: It's 'Cheesy'.

Now, I'm not asking for adult viewing here, I simply want contrast. Like that of the Lion King, Marry Poppins, Beauty & the Beast, etc. But instead it's just all too much camp happy go lucky bad voice acting. It's sad to think that even Walt Disney have succumb to the quick buck in exchange for a bad reputation. I hope Pixar© don't go this way also.

Verdict: This is a perfect example of more money than sense.
Burn it on sight!

Doctor Who - The Dominators [DVD] [1968]
Doctor Who - The Dominators [DVD] [1968]
Dvd ~ Patrick Troughton
Offered by themediamerchants
Price: £7.17

15 of 22 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Classic Look Back..., 9 Jun 2010
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
The Dominators has always had a lot of bad things said against it. And the main reason for this is the fact that there's an awful lot of bitterness amongst fans for having a standard story like this in the Vault, but not a Dalek Story of Pat's Era.

The Other reason this is frowned upon is that the Special Effects & Costumes aren't the best of this time! So if you are the kind of person that finds more enjoyment in uninspired rushed plots, CGI & Over Dramatic acting then this isn't for you!

IF - However, you enjoy a priceless look back on a Classic Black & White Dr Who, with all the great 60's atmosphere, Solid Acting, Spontaneous directing, Truly magnificent BBC Radiophonic Workshop Sounds, & a huge dollop of Fun; then this has your name on it!

From the Very first model shot, the charm & brilliance of this Classic glows from your TV! It's the old story of Drilling to the planets core! And the Doctor, Jamie, Zoe & the more intrepid members of a quite pathetic Race of Stoics do what ever they can to hault their progress!
I think the comedy of this story was entirely by accident! But it's so amusing to see the Alien Dominators get more & more wound up as the story progresses, to the point where by they even start getting annoyed with each other!!!

There are 2 of them: Rago (The Leader) & Toba who has a child like mentality! They have a certain amount of Energy which the Radiation from the planet gave them. And they can't afford to waste it on Weapon discharges when they need every drop of energy to complete the Drilling. And every time the Dr & his team attack, Toba gets Irate & shouts "Quarks! Search & Destroy!" The Quarks are their Robot Tools that end up using a lot of power to keep up & running.

By the 5th Episode, you are just literally in anticipation; waiting for Toba to Crack again.. "Quarks! Search & Destroy!!"
There's also some hilarious scenes with Pat & Frazer which demonstrates that even with a non-menacing story such as this that those 2 work so well together & gives insight as to why Jamie was the Longest Running companion! And not forgetting Wendy of course.. The Costumes are brilliant in the sense that only a totally different race would wear something like that! But (& contrary to the previous review!) Wendy looks adorable in it & keeps a certain kind of audience's attention (cough!); She looked good in anything!

See, Films & TV Dramas etc didn't always used to be as fake & computerised as they are now. And in that respect this story is perfect in terms of creativity :)
The Rocks are so blatantly made of Polystyrene, the wall obviously had an explosive charge in it, the Costumes are obviously made with Curtain Net, etc! But that's the point. People have gone to the EFFORT of "realisation" & "Imagination". That's the Beauty of it. And it's fascinating to work out how they did everything back then. I'd much rather look at Models, Animatronics, Puppets, Masks, Bubble rap etc than shinny & blatantly obvious False imagery generated by something that could be produced by a PlayStaion 3. Remember what happened to Star Wars! OH God save us from Jar Jar Binks. The Ewoks were obviously costumes, but they looked 'real'. THIS Story is just like that concept but on a much larger scale, as they had very little resources.

So the people who don't like this story are merely looking at this in the wrong way. Because apart from 1 episode too long & a few scenes that needed a re-take; This Story is Pure Magic!

"Quarks! Search & Destroy!"
Comment Comments (2) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Jun 29, 2010 2:33 PM BST

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