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P. Jeffery

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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Made me ill., 9 Sept. 2013
This hifi gave me cancer. And AIDS. Then I died. Now I am in hell typing out this review on one of those bl**dy annoying 'phones with squitty little keys I can's see properly. I would have sued the company that made it, but to be fair I was always going to go to hell anyway after all the ritual cattle mutilations, so fair's fair.

But seriously, after I bought this I started glowing in the dark and my winky felly off. Not good.

Positives: me, HIV, plus the bargain price.
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Sep 9, 2013 11:42 PM BST

Woolly Mammoth 20cm Soft Plush Toy
Woolly Mammoth 20cm Soft Plush Toy
Offered by Carousel Shop
Price: £14.99

23 of 23 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Mammoth-shaped object, 3 Jan. 2013
As a soft toy this item fully achieves its stated aims of being both soft, and a toy. However, as a palaeontologist, I have a number of quibbles with this toy's accuracy in depicting Mammuthus primigenius in all its antediluvian glory.

For a start, it's A Bit Blinkin' Small at 20cm! Even the diminutive Pygmy Mammoth stood more than 175cm at the shoulder! This item appears to be some kind of a tiny homunculus of a mammoth, and would have been stepped-upon unnoticed by its more able brethren.

Secondly, the gingery-brown appearance is a near-universal inaccuracy, fostered by finds of mammoth soft tissues preserved in Siberian permafrost. These finds include the thick, woolly hair, which in its preserved state is gingery-brown. However, this colour results from denaturing of the original dark brown pigments during burial. These would have caused the animal to appear black from a distance, and would have better enabled it to absorb scarce warmth in the bitter periglacial climes it once inhabited.

There are, of course, a number of other minor but glaring inaccuracies - such as the outsized eyes, the short over-thick tusks, plus the fact it doesn't bleed and bellow and thrash about in a frenzy of agony and terror when you hurl a flint-tipped spear at it, but these pale into insignificance besides the two outstanding inaccuracies I have highlighted.

So, as a plush companion for a young and rather credulous child, it is a wholehearted success, but as a Mammoth it really should hang its head in shame.

No Title Available

5.0 out of 5 stars Beautifully made watch, great supplier., 8 Feb. 2012
Title says it all really. Bought this for my girlfriend for Christmas, and she was delighted and now wears it every day!

Pictures don't do Bering products justice - they are beautifully finished and extremely classy.

The supplier's service was excellent too - quick, good comms, and a great price.

Technoline BL-700 Intelligent AA-AAA Professional Standard battery charger (UK Version)
Technoline BL-700 Intelligent AA-AAA Professional Standard battery charger (UK Version)
Offered by BatteryLogic
Price: £31.99

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Great charger, let down by needlessly complicated operation., 8 Feb. 2012
This is a well-made and highly effective product, it does all that it claims, with a comprehensive functionality that maximises charged and long-term battery life. Instructions are certainly comprehensive!

It does however have some drawbacks - it is quite pricey, it only charges AA and AAA batteries - which although quite clear, seems absurd given its price and overall excellence, and it is needlessly complicated to operate. In particular, having just 8 seconds to select mode of operation in something that can undertake a variety of functions with any one of four batteries simultaneously is absurd!

The instructions are very comprehensive, but have suffered something in translation, and do not make your life easier at-all. Something so simple as a battery charger should not be this complicated to operate, and a much more intuitive user-interface is needed.

Nonetheless, an excellent bit of kit from a functional point of view.

Jazooli High Power Super Bright Heavy Duty 3W 1 Led Waterproof Front Bike Light - Black
Jazooli High Power Super Bright Heavy Duty 3W 1 Led Waterproof Front Bike Light - Black

9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Cheap, bright but flawed cycle light..., 11 Jan. 2012
This was purchased for me as a Christmas gift to improve visibility and help me see better when cycling on dark winter lanes. It is cheap, bright and strongly-made externally, and certainly an improvement on the cheap Cat-Eye lamp I already had.
However, the light is just barely bright enough for this purpose, and in terms of making me more visible to drivers its beam is too narrow and constrained from any angle except straight-on.
The mounting is rather large and clumsy, requiring me to move the brake levers on my bike to fit it on, and the metal fittings started rusting after their very first exposure to rain!
Despite claims to the contrary, it is not waterproof, this caused the otherwise tight-fitting end caps to corrode shut, so that when swapping batteries I had to put the unit in a vice and use a plumbers wrench to open it up again! I can't imagine it surviving too many such treatments and it already looks battered as a consequence. I also suspect it will short-out next time it gets properly wet.
It is also essential to undo only the switch end to change the batteries - if you undo the lens end with the battery pack in-situ, the contacts get distorted and the lamp will not work.
This is probably a bit of a bargain if you're an occasional, fair-weather cyclist, but for daily all-seasons commuters I'd look elsewhere. Cycle lights are essential safety equipment, and the lesson learned here is to spend a bit more for something that will be reliable and easy to use - check user reviews carefully, and assume you get what you pay for!

UPDATE, 04/02/2012 - ***Avoid this light!*** Following the problems I've already identified, after another fortnight's use it started randomly switching itself off partway through my commute! Now it no longer works at-all. As it happens my bike's just been stolen so the bracket has gone anyway! PLEASE DON'T BUY - this is an unreliable waste of money!

Big Black Square
Big Black Square
Price: £9.76

5.0 out of 5 stars Big Black Review - Rebuff, 14 May 2010
This review is from: Big Black Square (Audio CD)
I like Tarentel - I wouldn't be writing this if I didn't, but I came late to their work, and so my buying choices have to some extent relied upon reviews. So when I came upon one on Amazon advising me that BBS was "crap" - I thought to myself "must be good". That's how useful most reviews are. This was no exception.

Big Black Square is a concentrated distillate of what Tarentel are all about - and arguably the ultimate exposition of their talents, at least to-date. Over a leisurely 40+ minutes it uncoils like a fractal image - coherent, yet shifting, polychromatic, yet of a one-ness - and uses music to tell a story and create a mindscape that words and pictures never could.

I wish it was longer, I wish there was a lot more like this, I don't want to leave this place I'm visiting - even though it scares me a little. The fear is part of the thrill, and while it's there, I know I'm alive.

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