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Jim Aitken

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The Ways Of Yore
The Ways Of Yore
Price: £11.78

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Chilled ambience, Jack!, 14 Dec. 2014
This review is from: The Ways Of Yore (Audio CD)
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tuohtiw yleritne snoitasrevnoc dloh
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elttil a saw I nehw rebmemer nac I

"egaruoc s'esroh a fo tset etamitlu eht" gnieb sa ot derrefer neeb sah taht ecar tluciffid ylsuoiroton a si esahcelpeets suomaf-dlrow ehT .sraey gninevretni owt eht ni dnoces emac osla dna ,7791 dna 4791 ,3791 ni lanoitaN dnarG eht now eh nehw elbert cirotsih dehctamnu na deveihca ohw esrohecar derbhguorohT noipmahc a saw )deraM :mad ,murouQ :eris ;5991 rebotcO 81 - 5691 yaM 3 ;gnidleg yab( Red Rum red Rum
Comment Comments (7) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Dec 19, 2014 3:16 AM GMT

Rain Dogs [2004] [DVD]
Rain Dogs [2004] [DVD]
Dvd ~ Christopher Adlington
Price: £15.99

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Yes, give this film the credit its due, 4 Aug. 2014
This review is from: Rain Dogs [2004] [DVD] (DVD)
This is a stunning effort from Robbie Moffat. Imho UK cinema is all too often let down by a lack of ambition. But with Rain Dogs, Moffat has blown the scene wide open.

The acting is as taught and virtuosic as anything you see in the likes of Mean Streets, The Godfather or Reservoir Dogs.

The cinematography is - in a single word - stunning. Many of the outdoors scenes have an almost Tarkovsky-like obsession with detail - pure unadulterated cinema wizardry. Unlike Tarkovsky, though, Moffat is all about the impetus of the screenplay, moving on, quickly, forcing the viewer to savour every sweet second of the photography.

The best films are the ones where you enter the cinema (or put the DVD into your DVD player) and get lost in a narrative so well-constucted that you forget real life exists. And when the credits roll, your entire way of looking at the world is transformed.

In a few important ways, this film actually does the impossible, and transcends the limitations of the film medium. So many mysteries here, you come away from this masterpiece as enriched as someone who has just read Nabakov's pale Fire, in one go.

I'll tell you what, £15.99 for this DVD is a bargain. Robbie Moffat is up there with the very best. He's Scorcese with more heart and humour, Tarantino with better mise en scene, Tarkovsky without the tedium of long panning shots, Speilberg sans sentimentality. Moffat is Harmony Korine, The Clash, The Beatless, The Pistols, Run DMC and Bob Dylan all rolled into one. I am talking about form. I am talking about function!

Highly recommended. And time for a 10th anniversary edition, too.
Comment Comments (19) | Permalink | Most recent comment: May 1, 2015 1:11 PM BST

Alpecin Double Effect Shampoo 200 ml
Alpecin Double Effect Shampoo 200 ml
Offered by Acorn solution
Price: £8.73

0 of 6 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant, 24 Nov. 2013
I bought this shampoo in the belief that it would add a couple of inches as I'm only four foot eleven and slightly embarrassed about it. I'd say there's defenitely been an improvement I am now inching towards five feet. I thought I'd maybe try the shampoo "down there" but no joy as yet although there are various creams and sprays available from Amazon.
Comment Comments (4) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Aug 25, 2014 8:45 PM BST

XLS Medical Fat Binder Tablets Weight Loss Aid - 1 Month Supply Pack, 180 Tablets
XLS Medical Fat Binder Tablets Weight Loss Aid - 1 Month Supply Pack, 180 Tablets
Price: £38.25

1 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant, 24 Nov. 2013
I used to be a real porker. A proper fatso. To put this into some kind of perspective, my buttocks had their own postcode such was their surface area, and my cereal bowl had its own coastguard.

Anyway some of these miracle pills and a cup of Bai Lin tea (look it up on Wikipedia) and I am now thin. Don't bother with eating less food and getting more exercise. The future is pills and surgery.

I am also four foot eleven but have lately gotten taller by using Alpecin shampoo which has stimulated by pituitary gland and added much needed inches.
Comment Comments (2) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Dec 19, 2014 3:21 AM GMT

Total "Brookside": The Ultimate Guide to the Ultimate Soap (A Channel Four book)
Total "Brookside": The Ultimate Guide to the Ultimate Soap (A Channel Four book)
by Geoff Tibballs
Edition: Paperback

0 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An absolute masterpiece, 12 Feb. 2012
This amazing book takes us from the early days of Brookside right up until its later days when, it's faire to say, the series had run out of narrative steam somewhat.

Moving from a council house on what's ominously referred to as "the estate", a DDR public housing tower in the grim eastern reaches of Berlin, trades unionist Bobby Grant moves into Brookside with wife Sheila, along with his family, loveable rogue and serial killer Barry, educationally subnormal but cheery Damon, and ultrafeminist daughter Kags.

The family's problems start the minute they move into no. 5 Brookside Close however because of four camp German gents who live next door and make a bit of a racket with synths. In one memorable episode - sick of the noise - Barry Grant goes round to the bungalow armed with an AK-47 assault rifle, and opens fire on Ralf Hütter, Karl Bartos, Wolfgang Flür and Florian Schneider. It's all going off in the bungalow but Barry turns out to have been duped - the German chaps are actually in Düsseldorf enjoying cakes and coffee - what he's been shooting at is four robots, not the real Germans.

The scriptwriters then got a bit precious and they would only release an episode every other decade, culminating in an entire DVD of different versions of episode 1, in French.
Comment Comments (4) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Dec 18, 2014 5:41 PM GMT

The Hitlers of Liverpool
The Hitlers of Liverpool
by Michael Unger
Edition: Paperback

5 of 15 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The ideal Christmas gift!, 25 Dec. 2011
If you're a fan of Liverpool or the Third Reich, then this is the book for you!

In the past a lot of the family history of Adolf Hitler wasn't the histroy we were taught: this is a shame since it's a rich tapestry of Northern stories which are by turns charming and bittersweet.

Trade unionist Bobby Hitler and wife Sheila spent the Weimar era living in public housing while bringing up their three kids Barry Hitler, Damon Hitler and Karen "Kags" Hitler. Another offspring Claire "ginge" Hitler appeared much later.

The Hitlers move from The Estate to a Cala homes development in another part of Liverpool and many adventures ensued: Damon Hitler invented the 'mullet' hairstyle, Barry Hitler became a serial killer and nightclub entrepreneur, while parents Bobby and Sheila Hitler inexplicably moved to Wythenshawe where they watched a lot of television and Bobby Hitler picked his nose and broke wind a lot.

Adolf came to visit the family a couple of times but didn't appreciate the gregarious nature of Liverpudlians, preferring to spend his time alone, often sitting for hours in the area surrounding the Albert Dock producing slightly forlorn watercolour paintings of drab surrounding warehouses.

It may have been the solitary nature of the young Adolf, or it may have been undiagnosed bipolar disease, but Adolf Hitler began to feel that everyone was against him; Karen "Kags" Hitler would subject him to lengthy Marxist diatribes, while Barry Hitler once even forced young Adolf into being the getaway driver for a heist that Barry and accomplices were carrying out on a local branch of Victoria Wine. Unfortunately one of the gang was in fact an undercover policeman and the resultant bloodbath ended in a Mexican Standoff that left everyone dead.

Hitler then decided that maybe Liverpool wasn't his kind of town and blew his brains out in the Cavern.
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Dec 26, 2011 12:25 AM GMT

THE COSMIC CUNT - brain update 2012 - DIE KOSMISCHE FOTZE (German Edition)
THE COSMIC CUNT - brain update 2012 - DIE KOSMISCHE FOTZE (German Edition)
Price: £5.21

5.0 out of 5 stars Die Kosmische Fotze, 15 Aug. 2010
I'll be honest, I've read better books. I am currently working on a spiritual manual for secular Rosicrucians. While this book has an "musing" title it is quite serious so stop sniggering.

Postman Pak And His Lazy Black & White Cunts [Explicit]
Postman Pak And His Lazy Black & White Cunts [Explicit]

0 of 3 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Tuneful!, 22 May 2010
This is a wonderful record. Eric Clapton stand aside: the British music scene has found a new God!

Play it on your own or at dinner parties.

No Title Available

1 of 4 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Pffft, 6 May 2010
Looks more like the opening credits of Porridge than a high security mental hospital to me.
Comment Comments (3) | Permalink | Most recent comment: May 21, 2010 4:44 PM BST

Abigail [Reissue]
Abigail [Reissue]
Offered by skyvo-direct
Price: £8.07

3 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A masterpiece, 27 Feb. 2010
This review is from: Abigail [Reissue] (Audio CD)
On the 7th July 1777 an evil being is brought dead into the world. It's name (perhaps improbably) is Abigail.

The Black Horsemen are instructed by protocol to nail Abigail to her coffin with seven silver spikes. The record opens with O'Brien of the Black Horsemen volunteering to administer the first.

The rest of the record takes place in 1845, when Jonathan Lafey and his bird Miriam Nathas come to live in the mansion which the former has inherited.

As they approach a horseman (not a centaur) (one of seven) calls Jonathan over and warns him not to enter the mansion 'on this night'. Presumably it is the 68th anniversary of Abigail's "birth". The horseman says if Jonathan doesn't take his advice, "18 will become 9".

So, 7/7/1777 = 7's are bad, or at least represent the evil being.

18 will become 9 in 1845. And the year 1845 breaks down like this: 18 is two 9s, and 45 is five 9s. What do two and five make? 7! Jonathan is 27, Miriam is 18. 27 + 18 is 45.

At this point it's fairly predictable that Jonathan and Miriam are in for a tough night.

Can anyone explain the significance of 68 though?
Comment Comments (5) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Aug 18, 2014 8:34 PM BST

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