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The Old Grey Witch's Test
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NAILS SOS Pen
NAILS SOS Pen
Price: £12.00

2.0 out of 5 stars Needs a re-thINC, 27 May 2015
This review is from: NAILS SOS Pen (Personal Care)
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
This product consists of a black plastic cylinder around four inches long. On the edge of the pen 'lid' is a tiny nail file in the form of a strip. The edge of the lid can be used to push back cuticles. At the other end are three replacement applicators Inside the pen is a tube of nail varnish remover which you apply using the 'pen nib' applicator.

Supposedly for 'manicure mishaps', those dreadful times when you find a trace of nail varnish has escaped onto your skin, the product is not well designed. The file is very small, the cuticle shaper sharp and unwieldy, and the applicator on the pen too broad to make removal accurate.

This is a pity as the concept of nail pens is a good one. As most of my 'manicure mishaps' are due to ripping off a bit of my nail or finding my varnish has chipped, I would like to have my nail varnish supplied in the form of a pen with a decent sized file and cuticle shaper. I'm sure this product would fly if NAILS Inc could produce these for each of its colours. I would then like another double ended pen which contained a varnish remover at one end and a nail conditioner at the other, as well as having the file and cuticle shaper on the outside.

As it is, though, even though I love NAILS INC products in general, I cannot recommend this one. Back to the drawing board, guys!


Fates and Furies
Fates and Furies
by Lauren Groff
Edition: Hardcover

4 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The Great American Novel!, 27 May 2015
This review is from: Fates and Furies (Hardcover)
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
Lordy! Even though I haven't finished all of this book I feel I must butt in here, as I am...err...in a state of apoplexy, caused by reading the two earlier reviews. These people just do not understand the American Dream! I must put things right...

When I was a teenager I thought I hated English Literature. I loathed the soppy nineteenth century romances we were forced to read. Jane Austen? The Brontes? George Elliot? Yuck!

Then, one day browsing in the school library, I discovered a book I actually wanted to read: F.Scott Fitzgerald's, The Great Gatsby. I was entranced. The beautiful, privileged, yet fatally flawed, characters. The fabulous settings. The Parties. The Sex. This was all my teenage mind desired! Much later, when I lived in the States, I discovered that all every American writer wants to do is to pen 'the great American novel' and that The Great Gatsby is considered to be the first of this genre.

The reason for my waffling on like this is because Fates and Furies is the modern equivalent of The Great Gatsby. Lauren Goff has achieved the American Dream. The Great American Novel. It is a work of pure, almost unutterable, genius.

The male protagonist, Lotto, named from the ancient heroic knight Lancelot, is our Great Gatsby. Good looking, impossibly rich, talented, yet somehow doomed to have his potential unrealised. The female, Matilde, mysterious, sometimes impossibly beautiful at other times plain, who, for some reason, lives her life through others in a passive/manipulative fashion. The book follows not just these two but a group of people through the tragedies of childhood, through student life at an Ivy League college, then the painful aftermath where life does not exactly come up trumps for the gilded youth of the late twentieth century. Through then to middle and old age when we finally learn why both Lotto and Matilde are what they are. It is an absolute tour-de-force and a complete triumph!

Beware, though, don't read it when you are tired. The book races, things happen so fast, so shockingly, that you can be caught unawares. You can miss the plot if you don't concentrate. Ms Groff swipes her pen likes a Dervish knife. She cuts fast and to the quick. You won't want to miss a syllable.

And afterwards you'll never be satisfied with boring British fiction again...
Comment Comments (4) | Permalink | Most recent comment: May 27, 2015 4:42 PM BST


FORZA Multivitamin for Dieters
FORZA Multivitamin for Dieters
Offered by HouseOfBeauty
Price: £7.48

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Excellent leaflet!, 25 May 2015
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
I was going to tell you that this product is a complete waste of time, that you should never go on a diet that leaves you short of vital nutrients, and that, should you wish to take a dietary supplement, there are much better ones on the market. But then I read the leaflet inside, and I have to admit it is rather good. It gives a range of easy to prepare lo-cal meals, plenty of advise on sensible exercise, a QR enabling you to download a diet journal. and, most importantly, tells you you should not embark on any diet without consulting your doctor. Hallelujah! So, although I still think that taking the actual pills may be unnecessary, I will endorse the whole package. Another good thing, you get 25% off your next purchase.


Love May Fail
Love May Fail
by Matthew Quick
Edition: Hardcover
Price: £12.99

3.0 out of 5 stars Small Member Halts Reviewer's Progress!, 25 May 2015
This review is from: Love May Fail (Hardcover)
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
Yes, it's me. The terrible Vine reviewer who posts reviews without reading the whole book!

So, why didn't I finish the book this time?

Well, in the first three chapters we learn that the female protagonist's rich, cheating husband has a small penis. It's about all we learn, and we learn it over and over again. By chapter 3 I was completely tired of this, and began to wonder why the author felt it necessary to tell us this so many times. Of course, Mr Quick is a man!

Suddenly it all made sense. Here is a man trying to write a Bridget Jones type book. And, being a man, he simply cannot get inside the mind of a woman. Helen Fielding would mention the offending member once and then pass on...

On a similar vein, women feel a particular affinity with Bridget Jones as she is a hard working girl who is unlucky in love. We are less likely to feel empathy for a manipulative dosser who evades doing a decent day's work by marrying a rich man. And anyone who marries a man with a small penis deserves what they get, of course.

So despite Mr Quick's best efforts (...and I have to admit here he does write supremely well; some of his short descriptive asides had me laughing out loud, hence the three stars), I could not connect with this book. I didn't like Portia. I found her mum simply embarrassing. I felt the nun figure was just an excuse to get Whoopi Goldberg to play her in the film. The teacher is simply a rip off from The Dead Poet's Society (With his black humour, Mr Quick may be hoping Robin Williams will be coming back from the dead to play him).

So, as I accept this Award for Bad Reviewing, I'd just like to thank the other Vine reviewers for telling you what the book is actually about, and how it ends, so I didn't have to...


GARDMAN GROW BAG SUPPORT FRAME 3 PACK
GARDMAN GROW BAG SUPPORT FRAME 3 PACK
Offered by One Click Wonder
Price: £10.41

5.0 out of 5 stars Sturdy support, 21 May 2015
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
These are very sturdy frames that just need the insertion of a cane to complete the shape and attach the plant. The bag is held nicely in place so doesn't squidge everywhere. My grow bag looks really professional now!


Disney Belle of the Ball Dryer Set
Disney Belle of the Ball Dryer Set
Price: £11.11

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A lovely first hair dryer..., 19 May 2015
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
This is a surprisingly powerful and effective dryer for something which looks like a toy. My nine year old tester and myself were delighted at the results, as we managed, with the use of a round bristle brush and some volumising mousse, to make some lovely curls and ringlets. The cold setting really helps making the hair designs permanent by the way. My companion did, however, complain that the tiara is scratchy, not sparkly enough, and tends to slip, so we are only giving the set four stars. We both agree, though, that the hairdryer itself makes this a worthwhile purchase for any little princess between the ages of 8 and 11.


Hallmark Birthday Contemporary 3D Attachment 2 Diamantes Card - Small
Hallmark Birthday Contemporary 3D Attachment 2 Diamantes Card - Small
Price: £3.99

1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars With deepest sympathy..., 19 May 2015
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
There can scarcely ever have been a more ill-conceived card than this. Imagine opening a black envelope to find a piece of cream cardboard with the words "Her sky was only filled with the brightest stars" typed upon it. What would you expect to find written inside? With deepest sympathy? So sorry to hear of your loss? No, it says "Happy Birthday". Is this some kind of sick joke? I must say I don't find it funny. As far as I'm concerned this card is totally unuseable. You have been warned.


Crayola-Colour Alive Enchanted Forest
Crayola-Colour Alive Enchanted Forest
Offered by Fun Collectables
Price: £7.20

1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars This could end in tears!, 13 May 2015
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
This review has been a long time coming because I have struggled to find someone to download the app onto their phone. Although you may blame this on my being a bungling twit, beware that if you buy this for a youngster you might be giving more frustration than pleasure. You need to be aware too that a young child will need an awful lot of help to get this to work (an old witch certainly did, anyway...). Only buy it, therefore, if you have the time and expertise to give this help. As for the product itself, I really wasn't that impressed with the quality of the colouring in book designs, and felt, for the price more special effects should have been included. For the same amount of money you could buy a much nicer book, with a greater range of pens, without the hassle of the iffy technology. I'm sure a young child would enjoy this just as much.


Rexel Advance Stay Put Folder and File - Purple (Pack of 5)
Rexel Advance Stay Put Folder and File - Purple (Pack of 5)
Price: £10.32

5.0 out of 5 stars Ideal for client presentation., 13 May 2015
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
These are very smart professional looking folders, ideal, I would think, not so much for storage as for presentation to clients. As such, you could put pricing information in the two side pieces and then add individual client requirements in the central file part. Add a business card into the front right pocket, et voila, perfection! I particularly like the dark purple colour, as it adds to the professional look.


The Eco Friendly Medium Beco Ball, Blue
The Eco Friendly Medium Beco Ball, Blue
Price: £4.29

5.0 out of 5 stars Go "fetch"!, 13 May 2015
Customer review from the Amazon Vine Programme (What's this?)
This is a lovely soft rubbery ball. It is very easy to throw so excellent for 'fetch' and yet flexible enough for your dog to have a jolly good chew on. Nice to know it's made from all natural materials so your dog can't come to any harm playing with it. (Goodness knows what my dog has swallowed over the years when playing with tennis balls!). My dog destroys most balls within an hour. This one has lasted a week. Good going!


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