Shop now Learn more Shop now Shop All Amazon Fashion Shop Suki Ad Campaign Pieces Cloud Drive Photos Shop now Amazon Fire TV Shop now Halloween Pets Shop now Shop Fire Shop Kindle Voyage Listen in Prime Learn more Shop now
Profile for Colonel Decker > Reviews

Personal Profile

Content by Colonel Decker
Top Reviewer Ranking: 2,054
Helpful Votes: 884

Learn more about Your Profile.

Reviews Written by
Colonel Decker "NO CODE" (LONDON)

Page: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11-20
The Thing (2011) [DVD]
The Thing (2011) [DVD]
Dvd ~ Mary Elizabeth Winstead
Offered by HarriBella.UK.Ltd
Price: 3.80

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A genuine homage to John Carpenter's The Thing makes this version a minor success, 24 Sept. 2015
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: The Thing (2011) [DVD] (DVD)
Just like John Carpenter's remake of Howard Hawks' classic The Thing was full of love and respect, some 30 years after we get the same from director Mathijs van Heijningen.

When dealing with a reboot/remake of a classic film it's usually time to run for cover, but this project instead decided to make a prequel to John Carpenter's movie. The plot is known to all of course, in Antartica an alien ship is found buried deep under ice and scientists working there from a largely Norwegian group go and discover at their own risk.... Soon all hell breaks loose as one by one each character may not be who you think they are. The Thing works because it is able to surprise us with decent suspence and keep us genuinely unsure of who will be the next victim.

It's easy to turn away in disgust when Mary ElizabeH Winstead turns up in all her glorious beauty- Carpenter's movie was female free, but the makers never go down a relationship route and Winstead firmly just becomes one of the team.

The Thing does have its problems of course. The early talkie helicopter scene is obviously a nod to the very original movie in the 1950s. It's a sad replacement, the 50s version dialogie was arguably filled with some of the richest dialogue for a horror/sci fi film at the time. Also you can feel that the film steps into remake territory with same as for scenes, although some of these are neatly spun on its head- so in the end there is no blood test etc. The effects are sadly all CGI, but they work quite well. Interestingly it's the close up shots that work the best. The Thing is pretty much a solid homage to what has gone before and fans will love the end credits so hang around!

Serbian Film [DVD] [2010] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
Serbian Film [DVD] [2010] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
Offered by supermart_usa
Price: 8.18

1.0 out of 5 stars A comedy without the jokes, 21 Sept. 2015
This doesn't get 1 star because of how controversial it is, it gets it out of sheer plagarism. What the makers did was take every controversial movie that they had seen through the years and stitch these scenes together to come out with A Serbian Film.

The acting isn't the best, neither is the script. Ok the production values do look good for a low budget movie, but so what when everything look fake. Let's talk about the baby rape. If you find a man having sex with a plastic doll offensive and a tape recorder of a baby screaming for its milk then look away. For the rest of us it was pathetic in its nature. Scrap the doll and think more like Kuato from Total Recall. Now obviously I don't want to see a baby being raped, but please don't try and shock us because the end scene is actually teenage comedy.

The gore is over the top stupid, so no you can't gorge out a mans eye with your penis. If you want to be moved emotionally by a movie that leaves you shocked try Irreversible or Martyrs. This seemed more like a comedy, a total failure.

April Fools Day [DVD]
April Fools Day [DVD]
Dvd ~ Deborah Foreman
Offered by FREETIME
Price: 16.76

3.0 out of 5 stars Thomas F Wilson steals the show in April Fools Day, 21 Sept. 2015
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: April Fools Day [DVD] (DVD)
Popular girl invites some of her friends to her lake retreat home for some fun. But one by one they are getting despatched, or is just an April Fools? Movie mostly works because the screenplay for what is essentially a slasher movie is well above average.

Director Fred Walton went on to make countless whodunnit mystery thrillers and was the director for the pilot episode of the 1980s version of Alfred Hitchcock Presents.

Characters as in so many of these 80s movies are likeable and Friday the 13th fans will recognize Amy Steel who played the hero Ginny in Part 2. But stealing the show is Thomas F Wilson, who went to playing Biff in Back to the Future to this movie. Wilson comes over like he's having a ball playing his character and has plenty of comedic moments, a career he would undertake alongside being an actor.

Aside from all that April Fools Day chugs along though the second half of the movie feels like filler time, a fun movie that can be watched by teenagers before venturing into the real deal.

Death At A Funeral [DVD]
Death At A Funeral [DVD]
Dvd ~ Matthew Macfadyen
Offered by 101Trading
Price: 4.95

3.0 out of 5 stars Sugar coated same old song and dance but fun in parts, 20 Sept. 2015
This review is from: Death At A Funeral [DVD] (DVD)
Breezy British comedy with the usual suspects. Daniel's father dies and we see him catching up with friends and family at his fathers wake. But chaos ensues and we get 90 mintues of slapstick humour. Some of it works very well, but we've seen better efforts elsewhere. This is the type of film that Cary Grant would have starred in had he been in his prime.

Alan Tudyk plays a British man very well but his LSD popping character becomes a tad tiring after ten minutes.
The movie at times replaces traditional humour with toilet, and almost goes down the pan because of it.

However at the end of the day Death At A Funeral is fairly funny and is recommended viewing for a pick you up- just don't pop on if you've just been to a funeral.

Dario Argento's Dracula [DVD] [2012]
Dario Argento's Dracula [DVD] [2012]
Dvd ~ Thomas Kretschmann
Price: 7.99

2.0 out of 5 stars Tired attempt at the Dracula story by Argento, 18 Sept. 2015
Not nearly as bad as some would have you think, but the problem here is that this is from Dario Argento. The movie feels tired and amateurish and some supporters have compared this to Hammer's Dracula movies, no way!

Asia Argento probably has saved her worst performance for this movie. The one plus point seems to be the costumes but everything feels like a cheapo BBC production, and this isn't the Argento that we have grown to love through the years.

Rutger Hauer seems disinterested too, though Thomas Kretschmann gives a decent enough performance of the count. All in all pretty forgetable stuff.

Hellbound - Hellraiser 2 [DVD] [1989]
Hellbound - Hellraiser 2 [DVD] [1989]
Dvd ~ Doug Bradley
Offered by best_value_entertainment
Price: 6.75

4.0 out of 5 stars Saved by a frentic second half and the evil of Dr Channard, 18 Sept. 2015
The biggest benefit of this sequel was that most of the cast from the original were able to return sans Andrew Robinson. The sequel continues right off the bat from the first movie with our central character Kirsty now confined in a psychiratic ward. But she has a problem, the doctor following her case wants a taste of hell. So here we go again.

The first half of the movie is a little goofy but it never bores, the doctors side kick for example should never have been in the film, his presence even brings a lighthearted mood to affairs not good for a Hellraiser movie. But it is the evil Dr Channard and his love for all things hell which gives this sequel its edge.

The second half of the movie is incredibly frentic and often scary not to mention filled with utter dread and that's what hell should be, right? We also get a backstory on Pinhead and the cenobites and the puzzle box. Effects wise, it seems all very 1980s and a modern audience would have to look past this. Gory in places and very downbeat in others, Hellraiser 2 certainly isn't as good as Clive Barkers original but runs it pretty close.

Die Die Delta Pi [DVD] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
Die Die Delta Pi [DVD] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
Price: 5.77

1.0 out of 5 stars Cool title, cool cover beyond awful film., 16 Sept. 2015
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Where to start? What an awful movie that has sadly been hyped up by horror sites, if this is what they think hails as an instant classic or a fresh injection for the slasher movie, God help us.

The production values are zero, the acting is zero, the plot is zero. Now I have no problem whatsoever about watching a movie with next to no budget, but if that is the case you need something else. A story helps, or one or two actors who you actually believe have learned their lines and are not ad libbing as shooting takes place.

Die Die Delta Pi starts in the 80s, but it might as well be the present day. Yes having an old Michael Jackson poster and a rubik cube shows zero effort. In short we are presented with obnoxious half wits at a sorority. A prank goes wrong and one of the students are left with burn marks. Fast forward to the present day, and revenge is on the cards.

In the actual 1980s there were many soriority slasher movies but they had a soul to them, even the really bad ones. Die Die Delta Pi has nothing. Indeed for the first 40 minutes very little happens, the final quarter of an hour tries to go all bloody on us but most kills either look too fake or are taken off screen. The black girl that dies deserves her place in history as one of the worst fake deaths ever witnessed on film.

Towards the end one cardboard cut out character turns to the other and says "I'm glad that's over", and it feels like a genuine message to us, the viewer.

I am a strong supporter of slasher movies and indie horror, but if this is amongst the best we are offered then this needs to be stopped in its tracks. The two directors Sean Donohue and Chris Leto shouldn't be allowed near a production of any movie again. Die Die Delta Pi is sadly a big let down.

Hellraiser [DVD] [1987]
Hellraiser [DVD] [1987]
Dvd ~ Andrew Robinson
Offered by best_value_entertainment
Price: 7.91

5.0 out of 5 stars A flawed masterpiece, 14 Sept. 2015
This review is from: Hellraiser [DVD] [1987] (DVD)
Clive Barker's Hellraiser most of the time ticks all the right boxes. Cold, fraught with sexual tension and horror in its purest form, Hellraiser is an 'adult' horror movie, best enjoyed by adults.

The movie tells the tale of the puzzle box and the hell that can proceed it if you play with it, a great adaptation on curiosity killed the cat. Frank is tempted and plays with it and is sent to the bowels of hell where the cenobites torture him for eternity.

Meanwhile on Earth his brother and his lover move into his old house, after cutting himself, Frank is reborn but the cenobites will be hunting him down. Now Frank needs humans to feed on to become whole himself.

An excellent original story and shot in London which gives the movie a different feel altogether. Frank's brother is played by Andrew Robinson the villian from Dirty Harry, and the acting is absoluetly spot on from everyone. The sheer dread of the movie is portrayed well and the cenobites in all their glory are let's face it absolutely terrifying.

But there are flaws to this masterpiece- watched a few times over it's obvious that director Clive Barker had producers pressure- the movie is spoonfed to us, he got his revenge in some ways with his follow up Nightbreed. The screenplay which was written by Barker isn't that strong either. And there is Robert Hines who plays Kirsty's would be boyfriend, this guy is so bad that had he been giving more screen time he could have single handedly brought the movie to its knees- witness his non reaction to the demons and monsters in the house.

That said the acting from the others is what pulls Hellraiser through, it's one of those rare horrors that does actually scare you and get under your skin. A 80s horror classic, and Barker's finest achievement on film.

American Psycho [DVD] [2000]
American Psycho [DVD] [2000]
Dvd ~ Christian Bale
Offered by Magic Movies Ltd
Price: 3.45

4.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious outrageous and gory Bale is on the money here, 10 Sept. 2015
This review is from: American Psycho [DVD] [2000] (DVD)
Yuppie horror you know the type- they will dip in to Silence of the Lambs but ignore Manhunter and claim Seven as their own because Brad Pitt stars in it. However with that said, American Psycho is a very good film and entertaining throughout.

Christian Bale is on the money as the psycho wall street killer and the movie has a great critque of the soulless business guys who take more care of their appearance than their clients.

Bale plays Patrick Bateman who has everything except for love and compassion. He fantasties about killing women and basically anything that annoys him. So if someone has a better business card than him this will set him off.

There is a great 80s soundtrack, and this is really a very dark comedy than an all out horror, though there are references aplenty especially from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Hilarious and outrageous in parts and all together a very good movie. William Dafoe is great as the private investigator and the ending is a knockout that will leave you thinkiing and discussing the movie for days.

I Madman [DVD] [1989] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]
I Madman [DVD] [1989] [Region 1] [US Import] [NTSC]

4.0 out of 5 stars Grabs you with atmosphere, a small slice of the late 80s., 7 Sept. 2015
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
Strange beast this one, because if you consider just the 'horror' in the movie this is quite average. But I, Madman has many different layers entwined into it. Downtown LA, Jenny Wright's apartment, her workplace the dusty second hand book shop. The whole feel of the movie is incredibly rich and completely steals a moment in time from the late 80s. You just had to be there to understand the many different fragments of this movie.

As for the plot it's an interesting one, especially in the face of slashers that were dominating the 80s alongside cheesy horror- I Madman has none of these traits. Sexy Jenny Wright loves her horror novels but keeps freaking herself out. Things take a turn when she believes that characters from the book she is reading are turning up in real life.

The acting at times is below par as is the script but these fluctuate as the film goes on and this is an entertaining movie. We perhaps are not rewarded with the ending that we deserved and the stop motion for the demon really does look dated.

I Madman is certainly worth checking out, its UK title was HARDCOVER.

Page: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11-20