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Helpful Votes: 189

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Reviews Written by
Marco M "Marco" (London, UK)

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Mens Black & Blue Check Stripe Cotton Scarf GL340
Mens Black & Blue Check Stripe Cotton Scarf GL340

4.0 out of 5 stars It's a scarf. It keeps you warm., 17 May 2014
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
I bought these for my nephews when I went home to Australia for a visit. You can't buy decent men's scarves there, and the boys loved them. They wore them to church that night and everyone complimented them. So I guess they're a winner!

Newcastle - Australia [DVD]
Newcastle - Australia [DVD]
Dvd ~ Lachlan Buchanan
Offered by fat_buddha
Price: £3.99

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Where do I begin??, 17 May 2014
This review is from: Newcastle - Australia [DVD] (DVD)
Having been born, raised and lived near an Aussie beach for 44 years, I was very interested in this movie. I bought the Blu-Ray version for a nice £5, and I'm very happy with the quality; the picture is superb.

The good points -

The cinematography, especially the underwater shots, is incredible. This is a beautifully shot film. The script is quite good, the dialogue is very true to life, just what you'd overhear on any Aussie beach. The performances from the young actors is also very good and very believable. Finally, the constant sweeping shots of the tanned surf-god's shirtless bodies makes the whole film a 100 minute perv-fest.

The bad points -

The marketing of this film. In their desperation to get a return on their investment, the producers have tried everything to market this movie. The name change for the UK market (adding 'Australia' to the actual title 'Newcastle' to save any confusion the Poms might have), the big head shot and rave review of Xavier Samuel to get the Twihards to buy it are just annoying. The biggest complaint I have is marketing of this as a gay film, in a desparate aim at the Pink Pound, as if its something similar to 'Shelter'. (It's even sold by a gay film store through Amazon!!!) This is NOT a gay film .... just because the film features a very, very tame pseudo-gay side plot for a few minutes does NOT make it a gay film!!! Maybe the acres of hot, young male flesh on display makes it a gay film, but I felt a little ripped off in this department. I was made to think it was a gay surf story ala 'Shelter', but made and shot in my home state. This reeks of desperation.

The ending. What were they thinking? What was that ending all about? I'm not going to spoil it for anyone reading this, but seriously??!! Watching a film for 1 hour 40 mins to have an ending like that? I'm surprised nobody has mentioned this in other reviews. Oh well, maybe I'm just a really strange person who expects a film to actually have an ending.

In conclusion, this film could have been so, so good. In fact, it probably could have had the potential to be a classic Aussie film. But by pandering to a straight, male surfing audience (once again to make as much money as possible), the makers wasted what should have been a beautiful, touching gay sub-plot. They obviously didnt want to offend any surfie boys watching this. And then they could have had a proper ending, that brought it all to a satisfying conclusion. It may sound trivial, but having a nothing ending like that destroyed the entire film for me.

Such a pity.

In The Name Of The King [2008] [DVD]
In The Name Of The King [2008] [DVD]
Dvd ~ Leelee Sobieski
Price: £5.99

1 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars An absolute stinker, 5 April 2014
This movie is truly awful. I bought it for £1 in a charity shop and I feel ripped off (well, at least my pound is helping those homeless doggies).

The plot - looks like they made a 5 year old watch all 3 LOTR movies in one sitting, then asked them to tell them what happened in it. It's just a bizarre mash of LOTR-ish stuff all strung together for no reason. (A scary forest, elves, a burning mountain with lava and a castle built into it, the Battle of Helms Deep re-enacted ... you get the idea).

Script - hilarious, one of the greatest comedy scripts since "Attack of the Clones". Eg, "Wisdom is our hammer and goodness are our nails". (???????????????????)

Acting - ohhh dearrrrr. Why is Jason talking like Don Corleone all the way through it? Why doesn't his facial expression ever change? Why is Burt Renolds in it? Was he that desperate to pay his booze bill? Did Ray want to outdo Jez Irons in the D&D movie, chomping his way through every scene?

Viz FX - looks very, VERY fake CGI-ish, but not as bad as other crappy low budget efforts.

Cinematography - very strange look to it. Very high contrast, blacks very black and whites and highlights too bright. Normally I wouldn't mention this in an Amazin review, but this was so bad it gave me eye strain and a headache.

Who would enjoy it? - boys between 4 and 6 will love it. Any boy over 7 will hate it, as will all girls.

In summary - I really wanted to turn this dire piece of rubbish off after 8 minutes, but I resisted and watched it right to the end thinking it would get better; it didn't. It's apparently based on the Dungeon Siege game. I think it would be way more fun playing the game than suffering this torture. I'm taking it back to the charity shop tomorrow so hopefully someone else will buy it and help those poor little doggies.

No Title Available

4.0 out of 5 stars My little niece loved it!, 13 Mar. 2014
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
It was difficult finding a scarf for my little niece who is obsessed with all things pink. She loved this and wore it non-stop during my visit back home to Australia. She even slept with it on! I guess you can't get a better review than that.

Dragonquest [DVD](2009)
Dragonquest [DVD](2009)
Dvd ~ Jason Connery
Offered by Qoolist
Price: £1.00

1.0 out of 5 stars Even worse than I thought it would be., 13 Mar. 2014
This review is from: Dragonquest [DVD](2009) (DVD)
I paid £1 for this today and feel ripped off. I bought it knowing it would be bad, but I thought at least it would be a laugh. How wrong I was. It's absolutely atrocious. Everything about it is terrible - a script that sounds like a 4 year old dictated it to a chimp who wrote it down as best it could. The acting is from the "become a broomstick" school of drama; in fact a broomstick would have more charisma than anyone starring in this mess. The FX ... ie the dragons of the title, look like they were knocked up in Poser by a 12 year old over a weekend.

I noticed Amazon have a few used copies of this selling for 1p. Even that's too much. It wasn't even funny-bad, it was slow-torture-bad.

At least the dog's home will benefit from my £1 purchase.

Lionheart [DVD]
Lionheart [DVD]
Dvd ~ Patrick Stewart
Offered by Jasuli
Price: £6.75

3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars The general public are conned yet again!, 5 Oct. 2012
This review is from: Lionheart [DVD] (DVD)
As other reviewers have already stated, this is the Hallmark TV miniseries of James Goldman's play "The Lion in Winter" repackaged and retitled as a new action movie. Don't get me wrong, I think "The Lion in Winter" is a brilliantly written work and the original 1968 movie version staring Peter O'Toole and Katherine Hepburn is one of the greatest films ever made. But this version is so woeful I had to switch it off when I watched it in 2003. To have the audacity to repackage a bad TV miniseries as a new movie is disgusting. Then to lie on the packaging - yes there are no battles even though the description on the box claims there are - is surely illegal.

Do not buy this and send a message to these unscrupulous companies who think we're a bunch of morons who can be fleeced and conned like this.

A Simple Plan [DVD]
A Simple Plan [DVD]
Dvd ~ Bill Paxton
Price: £5.99

5.0 out of 5 stars Yes, it IS as good as other reviewers have said!, 1 Oct. 2012
This review is from: A Simple Plan [DVD] (DVD)
This is a truly great film, one of the best films to come out of the US for last 20 years. What I love about it is the complete believability of the entire movie, you can imagine this is EXACTLY what would happen in this situation.

Gear4 GP07 In Ear Headphones - Black
Gear4 GP07 In Ear Headphones - Black
Offered by Express Essentials
Price: £3.08

1.0 out of 5 stars Rubbish headphones, 10 Sept. 2012
I just opened up the box after buying these headphones, and the right-side ear piece doesn't work. When I giggle the base of the wire around it crackles and works for a few seconds, then stops working again. Obviously there is a wire that is unconnected where the plug and wire meet.

So this product has zero quality control, and the factory doesn't care what rubbish comes out of it. Something as simple as soldering the wires correctly tells me they don't give a toss. I wont be buying anything from this company again.

The Trip To Bountiful [DVD] [1985]
The Trip To Bountiful [DVD] [1985]
Dvd ~ Geraldine Page

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars One of the most beautiful movies ever made., 20 Feb. 2012
Verified Purchase(What is this?)
I saw this on the TV years ago. My Mum had turned it on and I walked into the lounge room just to stretch my legs soon after it started. Within 2 minutes of watching it, I was hooked, and by the end both my Mum and I were sobbing. Since that night I've watched it about 10 times. This is one of the most beautiful movies I've ever seen, Geraldine Page's performance is one of the greatest pieces of acting ever put on film. (She won the Oscar for it.) Anyone who appreciates good cinema should buy this, and at this price it's a no-brainer (50p incl postage).

How To Train Your Dragon [DVD]
How To Train Your Dragon [DVD]
Dvd ~ Jay Baruchel
Offered by Discs4all
Price: £3.96

5.0 out of 5 stars A really lovely movie, 20 Feb. 2012
If you're like me and put off buying this movie because you're not sure about it from all the hype, then fear not! Just buy it, watch it and enjoy it, it's a really lovely, heart warming movie for everyone aged 5 to 100!

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