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A tribute to Mortimer Chalfont

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Showing 1-25 of 473 posts in this discussion
Initial post: 25 Sep 2012 17:02:36 BDT
Huck Flynn says:
I'm sure you'll all want to pay tribute to the genius of the imaginary musician and composer. I know many of you have vivid memories of his concerts. His work on the hurdy gurdy was a big influence on guys like Jeff Badger and The Solomon Seven. I've got all his albums - hard to pick a favourite.

Any good stories ?

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 17:06:09 BDT
Brass Neck says:
Didn't he get his big break on triangle and maraccas in the Filthy Farquahars?

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 17:10:30 BDT
He, by an amazing dint of synchronicity, wrote the music for an ad by the watch company Timer, which featured the unforgettable couplet - More Timer for a Timer from Timer. Not to forget the educational cd he released in which he and the famous Eastern composer discuss their approach to music and the generation of new sounds-"Talking with Mi Yarce", to be remastered and rereleased apparently.

Sad to see another part of the imaginary composition sector becoming a part of history.

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 17:16:22 BDT
Brass Neck says:
Wasn't he also a guest on the renowned pinnacle of folk music that was 'Fiddling With Mike Hunt'?

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 17:30:08 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 17:37:05 BDT
Huck Flynn says:
I'd nearly forgotten that Smitty !
I remember when Ritchie Blackmore left Deep Purple there were a lot of rumours about who his replacement would be but to his eternal credit Chalfont wasn't even considered. He once admitted that he wouldn't know the difference between a riff and a brief, recognizable section of a song that is repeated on guitar. Strange guy - he seemed to be smaller the closer you got to him !

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 18:14:29 BDT
Gordon Dent says:
Of course, Mortimer Chalfont was romantically linked with Emma Freud for a short time in the nineties, when they expressed their wish to retire from celebrity life, become farmers and grow grapes. Alas, it wasn't to be. Mortimer's twin obsessions with Plymouth Argyle FC and fictional TV detective Jim Rockford undermined the couple's relationship.

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 18:34:15 BDT
nocheese says:
I met him once; we had a brief conversation during which it emerged we could both recite the 'talking bit' in the Everly Brothers 'Ebony Eyes'. For me, this illuminated the sheer humanity of the man.

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 18:58:15 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 19:42:11 BDT
CHEEZE says:
A cousin of Farmer Giles,if i'm not mistaken?
He has a great affection for Miles.
Oooo me Chalfont....

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 18:59:54 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 19:06:19 BDT
oh the talking bit in ebony eyes is a beauty - wasn't Mortimer briefly in The Fall ?

I have come across rumours in the darker corners of the internet that he has partially recovered from his 'episode' and may be getting the old band back together - now that Toothy is out of prison after 'the incident' - is a tour and a new album too much to hope for ??

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 20:08:24 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 20:09:17 BDT
Sparky says:
I had almost forgotten him before this thread started - in fact I'd never heard of him - but I realised at once that he was a major influence on all of the acts that I consider to be seminary, particularly Judas Priest and Thelonius Monk. In the main his work was unclassifiable, which is why you could never find it in HMV, but it is well known in the industry that all Julian Bream's gold discs were in fact sprayed-up Mortimers (and not Band on the Run as has been alleged on another thread (on another forum)). Like most musicians he couldn't paint for toffee which resulted in several succesful exhibitions at the Tate Modern, however he never quite made enough to fulfill his dream of providing a nuclear powered gunboat for Greenpeace. I am told he was very disillusioned when his death was announced.

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 20:15:13 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 20:20:18 BDT
CHEEZE says:
Dead you say! I thought we were just paying him/compliments?

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 20:19:09 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 20:19:51 BDT
nocheese says:
Sparky - 'seminary':
an institution of secondary or post-secondary education for educating students (sometimes called seminarians) in theology, generally to prepare them for ordination as clergy or for other ministry.'

Sorry, can't help myself,

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 20:22:28 BDT
CHEEZE says:
I can see that nocheese, but as usual, i forgive you.

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 20:27:39 BDT
nocheese says:

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 20:33:04 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 22:36:25 BDT
Ahh yes, The Farquahars, now there was a band. There was Stew Pete(he did a lot of cooking), Dozey(he slept a lot), Nuy Ying(he was from Cambodia and changed his last name by deed poll), Smelly(for reasons all too obvious if you were anywhere near him)....................the rest escape recall at this juncture.

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 20:43:27 BDT
Sparky says:
nocheese - yes I knew that, there's a (very poor) kind of a joke there, not very funny admittedly, not funny at all to be truthful, but what can you expect for nothing these days........

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 22:35:47 BDT
Another tale of the emerging talent that was Mortimer that has just sprung from the stygian depths of my memory relates to his lack of worldy knowledge around the time he started to make a name for himself as an arranger for hire. Basically, Mortimer had been born and raised on a remote island off the coast of Scotland where electricity was something that was brought over from the mainland in the form of D sized batteries once a month and was therefore not so aware of the ways of other artists.

He was hired by two groups of the early 70's both renowned for their fondness for pharma related products. Young Mortimer was in the studio one day working on a string arrangement when the unkempt and usually uncommunicative guitarist asked Mort if he had any "horse" on him. Quick as a flash, Mortimer told him to wait 5 minutes and he could get him some. Sure enough, after nipping into the adjoining studio and rifling through some of the bags lying near the back he returned beaming and pleaseed with himself. He gave Mr X(legal reasons prevent me from actually naming the guitar player even though a lot of his sordid past has been revelaed elsewhere) one of the bows from the first violin section. Poor Mortimer, he never knew what hit him.

Another occasion saw the inventive chap giving another band a bottle of whiskey each, laced with laxitives, in an attempt to fulfill a request for some drugs to be sneaked into the studio to help things run smoothly. A steep and often painful learning curve for the oft chaffed Chalfont, methinks.

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 22:37:12 BDT
Last edited by the author on 25 Sep 2012 22:48:30 BDT
Morts eyes were on occasion fairly ebony as my tales immediately above recount.

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 22:44:22 BDT
Surprised no ones seen fit to mention his brief but colourful foray into the world of cinema - as the third guy from the left in the opening gun fight of A Fistful Of Dollars [1964] [DVD] [1967] and as the guy with the shorts in Carry on Camping [DVD] - but a late blossoming second career cannot be ruled out, as anyone who has noticed his cameo in The Expendables [DVD] in his masterful portrait-al of the third hench man will be able to testify.

The there was that scandalous and much debated appearance on late night TV in the eighties....

In reply to an earlier post on 25 Sep 2012 22:49:16 BDT
Yes, I remember. I wonder if they ever got that piano cleaned out.............Sad.

Posted on 25 Sep 2012 22:53:56 BDT
Last edited by the author on 26 Sep 2012 00:32:33 BDT
Lez Lee says:
I well remember his appearance on Desert Island Discs. Having misunderstood the premise, he spent half an hour hurling circular objects at Sue Lawley.

In reply to an earlier post on 26 Sep 2012 00:07:24 BDT
Apparently Mortimer was still in a bit of a adrenalised state when he showed up for the recording of that show, Lez, having just been let out of Scotland Yard. He was overheard saying he was tripping on acid in a restaurant close to the Old Bill and was promptly arrested by a police officer at the next table. It turned out that had slipped on vinegar, an unfortunate turn of phrase in that situation with the company he was in, to be sure.

In reply to an earlier post on 26 Sep 2012 16:12:09 BDT
Last edited by the author on 11 Dec 2012 17:01:17 GMT
Huck Flynn says:
Bad luck dogged Mort, Smitty that and his total non-existence were the only things that prevented him being a household name like Conway Twitty, Jools Holland or Hubert Bentinck.
The break up of the Farquahars, as Brassy mentions, was another case in point. The FFs were one of the first family groups consisting of Dermot, his 4 nephews, 2 aunties, a 2nd cousin and the grandfather, Neddy Farquahar. Mort only got in because he was having a fling with one of the aunties and this caused jealousy in the band. In the end i believe they convinced him to go by filling his bassoon full of marmite.

In reply to an earlier post on 26 Sep 2012 17:51:20 BDT
Brass Neck says:
'The beak up of the Farquahars' - they gave him the bird? ;)

In reply to an earlier post on 26 Sep 2012 17:56:07 BDT
Ouch! Nothing worse than having some unchious material in yer woodwind works.
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Discussion in:  music discussion forum
Participants:  23
Total posts:  473
Initial post:  25 Sep 2012
Latest post:  18 Apr 2013

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