13 Going On 30 [VHS] [2004]

The next Jenna knows it is seventeen years later and she has, apparently, everything she ever wished for (breasts) and more (a job as an editor for "Poise" magazine). Her best friend is Lucy (Judy Greer), who turns out to not only be Tom Tom grown up but another editor at the same magazine. Jenna immediately tracks down Matt (Mark Ruffalo), who is also all grown up, except he remembers everything that happened since the last time they spoke: the day of her 13th birthday party. At that point we know that two things are going happen. First, despite having the knowledge and experience of a 13 year old Jenna is going to be a success at her job. Second, despite having the knowledge and experience of a 13 year old Jenna is going to end up making out with Matt (but not the naked guy in her apartment).

Yes, we have seen the idea of a kid in an adult's body from the original "Freaky Friday" to "Big" to the recent "Freaky Friday" and a dozen other movies in between. The lack of originality does not bother me with "13 Going on 30," but the lack of creativity with this script does. Excuse me while I rant for a while, because I really wanted to enjoy this movie.

First, Jenna was out of date by the time she was 13 back in 1987. "Thriller" came out in 1982 and five years later young Jenna is making sure she has all of Michael Jackson's zombie moves down on the dance floor (you have to admit that this movie takes spontaneous group participation to a new level: instead of everyone bursting into a well known song this time around it is doing all the dance moves from a music video that is twenty years old). Rick Springfield's big hit, "Jessie's Girl" was a hit way back in 1981, while Pat Benatar's "Love is a Battlefield" was big in 1983 (Note: Sometimes I tell viewers to be sure and watch the end credits; this time I am telling you to stay and LISTEN to the entire end credits). They make such a point of Jenna being 30 in the year 2004 that it makes tying the starting point to 1987 problematic. Gee, do you think that maybe this script was written four or five years ago?

Second, leaping forward 17 years into the future presents Jenna with only one point of confusion: her cell phone. She has no problem walking in high heels, no other technological problems confront her, Eminem is the only new name she is confronted with, and if you really want to pick nits she never notices that the World Trade Center is missing. Okay, that is really quibbling, but they really should have been able to come up with some creative ways of her dealing with the brave new world in which she finds herself.

Third, Jenna only succeeds in her job because the screenwriters wrote a scene in which everybody acts like she succeeded in doing her job. I thought the joke of "Magazine Publishing for Dummies" was good (I looked, Amazon does not sell the book), but that is still a kid's mind in that gorgeous body. Jenna needed to come up with a great idea and she did not even come up with a good idea. Meanwhile "Poise" has been scooped six months in a row by a rival magazine and the board is just starting to become concerned (when Bruce Springsteen showed up on the cover of both "Time" and "Newsweek" that was a bigger story that this). If I could talk about how that subplot plays out I could double the length of this rant with all the holes in that one.

What holds "13 Going On 30" together is Garner's performance, which is far better than this script deserves. In a film like this there is always a moment when the main character has the chance to put things to right. When we get to that moment in this film it is disappointing because they should have been able to come up with something better. But then, we never really understood everything that happened to turn Jenna into a big success after her 13th birthday so we cannot expect the film to really connect the dots at the end either. The result is an unsatisfying film that fortunately will not start Jennifer Garner's rising star one whit. In fact, she is going to pick up momentum off of this one, she shines that much.