Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen [VHS] [2004]

Lola and Carla are competing for the lead role in the school's production of an updated musical version of George Bernard Shaw's "Pygmallion" (wow, a musical version of "Pygmallion"; there is an idea). Lola sings a song by her favorite ground, Sidarthur. Is she a better singer than Carla, who assumes the leading role is her birthright? The question is moot because we do not get to hear Carla sing; we only get to find out the decision of the drama teacher, the eccentric Miss Baggoli (Carol Kane). Besides, Lola and Ella are traumatized by the news that Sidarthur is breaking up (fortunately they have crushes on different band members). The group is doing one last concert and getting to go is now the most important thing on earth, except for going to the party afterwards. Carla will be there (her dad is the band's attorney, despite living in Dellwood, New Jersey), and the competition between the two girls is probably even more important than hearing their beloved band's last gig or having Lola meet her idol, Stu (Adam Garcia), "the greatest poet since Shakespeare."

Of course there will be a series of comic misadventures, blatantly telegraphed, as the girls travel to the big city. However, the big moment in the film comes when Carla outs Lola as a drama queen. Yes, there is the irony that Lola is being called out on something about which she is telling the truth. The problem is that except for one big lie about her father, and one little lie about her name, Lola has not been a real drama queen. We know she is one because her mom (Glenne Headly) says so, but this film should have done more than let the title serve as a label to prove the point. There must be more examples from the original book that could have been worked into the script, especially given how important they would have been to setting up the big moment, but they just are not here and a major reason why this film does not work. Maybe on the DVD we will see evidence they at least shot additional scenes, even if they decided not to use them (as well as scenes that justify Sam's presence at the end).

Then there is the ending of the film. Like most of the other key moments in "Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen" the way the war between Lola and Carla plays out is so obviously set up that you do not get to enjoy either the anticipation of the moment or its actual execution. But then there is the whole musical at the climax of the film. The idea is that they are doing contemporary songs for this modern version of "Pygamlion"; Eliza is now works checkout at a supermarket (trying saying "New York" with an "r" in it Professor Higgins suggests). The songs are "Living for the City" by Stevie Wonder and "Changes" by David Bowie, which makes sense for both the play and the movie but now in a way that really works. I mean, you have to think about it for a while. Besides, it does not help that Ella is the true figure of transformation in the movie and not Lola. Compare the ending of this film to that of "Uptown Girls," another fairly predictable movie, that manages to bring together a lot of elements in a fairly effective conclusion. Here we just have a lame ending to an uninspired film.

When Lola chooses Ella over Carla I immediately started have strong flashbacks to the pilot episode of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," where Buffy chooses Willow over Cordelia. This only served to reinforce the idea that this film gets three stars because of Alison Pill in the gal pal role. Pill, who I caught last week in "Pieces of April, and who has already moved on to being an actress while Lohan is working out the joys of being a personality. In a film that wastes the talents of Glenne Headly and turns Carol Kane into a recurring joke, Pill is the only one in the cast who really has a chance to shine. The other person who really looks good because of this film is Jamie Lee Curtis, who now gets even more props for making "Freaky Friday" work so well.