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Conspicuous Compassion: Why Sometimes it Really is Cruel to be Kind
 
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Conspicuous Compassion: Why Sometimes it Really is Cruel to be Kind (Paperback)

by Patrick West (Author)
4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
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Product details

  • Paperback: 79 pages
  • Publisher: Civitas:Institute for the Study of Civil Society (Feb 2004)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 1903386349
  • ISBN-13: 978-1903386347
  • Product Dimensions: 20.8 x 13.6 x 0.4 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 355,717 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Product Description

The Daily Telegraph
Britain is suffering from a severe bout of 'morning sickness', a collective condition characterised by ostentatious recreational grieving.

The Guardian
People who wear ribbons to show empathy with worthy causes...are part of a growing culture of 'ostentatious caring'.

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Average Customer Review
4.3 out of 5 stars (3 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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17 of 20 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Tough but True, 27 April 2005
By A Customer
At last, someone has been brave enough to tell the truth about Britain's growing culture of "ostentatious caring". West argues that public displays of compassion are more and more about showing others what kind of person you are, and not about helping the poor and unfortunate. In fact, "conspicuous compassion" can even be harmful.

This book is a clear statement of what so many of us feel -- I hugely recommend it to anyone who really wants to do some good in our world.

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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Very good, 20 Jul 2008
By Mr. A. J. SMITH (Aberdeen, Scotland) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This is a well written pamphlet. The prose is eloquent but economical. The chapters are short but to the point. The author has a decent grasp of narrative flow, knows how to properly structure an argument and there are even occasional flourishes of wit. More importantly, the subject is one worthy of study. Why has the British 'stiff upper lip' been replaced with an imbecilic culture of 'look at me' emoting? And what are its implications?

The author makes many astute observations but two are particularly good. First, he argues that much of what passes as public compassion these days is insincere posturing and motivated by little more than the emotional vanity of individuals. It is too easy to merely ponder the absurdity of people queuing 8 hours to sign a book of condolence for someone they don't know. It is more cutting (and right) to argue that such people are, most likely, dysfunctional sorts acting out of insecurity and loneliness.

Second, the author correctly identifies where that insecurity and loneliness comes from. For example, he realises that mass displays of public grief and protest movements have filled the void created by a loss of local community and social cohesion. Uniting in grief for complete strangers provides many people (especially middle-aged housewives, bored silly at home) a rare opportunity to experience some kind of social connection. The bond may be artificial, fleeting and based on nonsense but it is a bond nonetheless. And people increasingly living in isolation need them.

Though this pamphlet was written five years ago it remains absolutely relevant. No doubt a revised edition would get plenty of copy out of Live Eight, the Tsunami in South East Asia and the disappearence of the McCann girl. Large sections of the British public still love to wallow in grief for people they don't know or champion political causes they don't care about. Our media encourage it at every turn and our politicians join in, clearly not wishing to be tarred as uncaring or immoral.

My one criticism is that West doesn't really acknowledge how changes to the media have contributed to this problem. It is not just the structure of society that has changed. Our media outlets have too. The ultra-competitive mass media industry has spawned a culture of 24 hour rolling news. There is a constant demand for news and this is best met by dragging 'human interest' stories out long past the point of them actually being newsworthy. The excessive mourning of Diana can't simply be blamed on the vanity of unfulfilled, isolated individuals. Surely the media exacerbated the problem with its relentless and obsessive coverage?

Overall, though, this is very good and in keeping with the high quality one has come to expect of work published by Civitas.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars The Cruelty of 'Compassion' , 27 Aug 2008
By Ms. M. O'Regan (Cork) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This is quite an exceptional read. Very well written, intellectually rigorous, but clear and concise. It presents itself as being too concise on first glance. When one receives the book, one wonders how it can deal adequately with the subject matter for so short a book. But it is never repetitive. Never puffy with sentimentalism for the `good old days' when society did not suffer from what the author terms `mourning sickness'. Never stuffed with the schmaltzy emotionalism so loathed by the author. There are those who may think it too candid an account of just how far society has degenerated into contrived caring. But then if the book were an alcoholic beverage, it would be a gin and fresh lime: meant for quick, effective consumption. Tinged with bitterness yes, but the tangy aftertaste is unforgettable and very authentic. Complete with acerbic wit. It is an important historical work, aptly cataloguing the destructive nature of superficial kindness. It details a series of paradoxes, such as why we sport ribbons for myriad of causes from pink ribbons for breast cancer to red ribbons for Aids, but how we neglect to wear brown ribbons for the millions who die yearly from diarrhoea. Simply because our own public image is all important. The author is brave enough to direct many of its theses directly at the reader, including advising readers to turn off their TVs and not to engage in personal guilt trips for such massive historical tragedies as the Irish Famine. On that last point, whilst I did find the book very refreshing, I found the treatment of the Irish Famine to be too pithy. What is perhaps most impressive about this book is that it does not pander. Not to any public figure nor to any race, nor to any hip religion. It wants to be above trendiness.

My main criticism would be: there is not enough recognition of how people are subconsciously supplanting traditional religion. West does give very sound acknowledgement to how breakdown of the community has left people scrounging for a sense of belonging. And the blurb on the back does use the religion metaphor for `mourning sickness', when it explains, `its collective minutes' silences its liturgy and Mass'. But in the case of the actual people West writes about, the majority would, in former times, have been very active in their Christian Churches. Instead of obsessing over the deaths of the Soham girls, they would have meditated on the deaths of child martyrs and would have displayed crucifixes in their homes. Instead of pointless agonising over what might have been, people would have been more open to `the will of God'. For Catholics, instead of colourful ribbons, they would have worn Miraculous medals or, (dare I mention the unfashionable colour) brown scapulars. But while the `conspicuous compassion' of today has no long-term benefit, there were those in a more Christian age, who believed that the religious practices detailed above, was done with the view of obtaining blessings from the Almighty. I first developed an interest in this book, when I saw the cover: a picture of the ocean of flowers for Diana. There was an account in an Irish newspaper, detailing how Princess Diana now holds a place in Catholics' hearts that was once reserved for the Virgin Mary. Whilst West's `Conspicuous Compassion' does not make arguments for the decline of Christian culture, it does document meticulously, what I believe is the result of the abandonment of Christian culture: the rise of contrived compassion. It is simultaneously a thoroughly enjoyable and enlightening read.
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