Join Amazon Prime and get unlimited Free One-Day Delivery. Already a member? Sign in.

 

or
Sign in to turn on 1-Click ordering.
 
   
More Buying Choices
28 used & new from £4.99
Have one to sell? Sell yours here
 
   
Trouble with Alex: A Child Too Damaged to Love
 
 
Share your own customer images
Search inside this book

Trouble with Alex: A Child Too Damaged to Love (Paperback)

by Melanie Allen (Author)
4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
RRP: £12.99
Price: £8.44 & this item Delivered FREE in the UK with Super Saver Delivery. See details and conditions
You Save: £4.55 (35%)
o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o
In stock.
Dispatched from and sold by Amazon.co.uk. Gift-wrap available.

Only 4 left in stock--order soon (more on the way).

Want guaranteed delivery by Tuesday, July 14? Choose Express delivery at checkout. See Details
20 new from £6.00 8 used from £4.99

Frequently Bought Together

Customers buy this book with That Mean Old Yesterday: An Abused Girl's Fight for Survival by Stacey Patton

Trouble with Alex: A Child Too Damaged to Love + That Mean Old Yesterday: An Abused Girl's Fight for Survival
Price For Both: £14.43

Show availability and shipping details

Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought

Cut: The True Story of an Abandoned, Abused Little Girl Who Was Desperate to be Part of a Family

Cut: The True Story of an Abandoned, Abused Little Girl Who Was Desperate to be Part of a Family

by Cathy Glass
5.0 out of 5 stars (16)  £3.77
That Mean Old Yesterday: An Abused Girl's Fight for Survival

That Mean Old Yesterday: An Abused Girl's Fight for Survival

by Stacey Patton
2.0 out of 5 stars (1)  £5.99
Wednesday's Child

Wednesday's Child

by Shane Dunphy
4.2 out of 5 stars (5)  £5.49
The Boy in the Cupboard

The Boy in the Cupboard

by Shane Dunphy
4.0 out of 5 stars (1)  £5.24
Cry Silent Tears: The Heartbreaking Survival Story of a Small Mute Boy Who Overcame Unbearable Suffering and Found His Voice Again

Cry Silent Tears: The Heartbreaking Survival Story of a Small Mute Boy Who Overcame Unbearable Suffering and Found His Voice Again

by Joe Peters
4.9 out of 5 stars (47)  £3.77
› Explore similar items

Product details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster Ltd (7 April 2008)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 1847370101
  • ISBN-13: 978-1847370105
  • Product Dimensions: 21.8 x 14 x 3 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 201,988 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    •  Would you like to update product info or give feedback on images?

Product Description

Product Description
Melanie Allen had a dream - to adopt a special needs child and provide a stable loving family for her. But her dream turned into a nightmare that would tear her family apart. To all appearances the adopted girl, Alex, was obedient, happy and charming but, over the course of five years, Melanie was left desperate by the undiagnosed behavioural condition of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) - a problem not uncommon in children who are neglected. Alex festered with the rage and hatred born out of her unimaginable neglect as an infant. The manifestation of her symptoms was so malevolent and destructive that even Melanie's relatives didn't believe her when she told them the truth about Alex. She sought help from social services, to secure a correct diagnosis and support. What she got instead was to be herself accused of abuse and neglect, resulting in a court case and a near-fatal incident that finally proved her innocence. This shocking story of how a caring, willing family were left powerless and desperate in the face of social services' incompetence is a thought-provoking and page-turning memoir. It is also a powerful, gripping narrative that tells what happens when someone you welcome into your home ends up destroying it, through no fault of their own.
Inside This Book (Learn More)
Browse Sample Pages
Front Cover | Copyright | Excerpt | Back Cover
Search inside this book:

Tags Customers Associate with This Product

 (What's this?)
Click on a tag to find related items, discussions, and people.
Check the boxes next to the tags you consider relevant or enter your own tags in the field below
(1)
See all 4 tags...

Your tags: Add your first tag
 
See most popular tags

What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item?

Trouble with Alex: A Child Too Damaged to Love
59% buy the item featured on this page:
Trouble with Alex: A Child Too Damaged to Love 4.5 out of 5 stars (10)
£8.44
Cut: The True Story of an Abandoned, Abused Little Girl Who Was Desperate to be Part of a Family
12% buy
Cut: The True Story of an Abandoned, Abused Little Girl Who Was Desperate to be Part of a Family 5.0 out of 5 stars (16)
£3.77
Hidden: Betrayed, Exploited and Forgotten. How One Boy Overcame the Odds.
12% buy
Hidden: Betrayed, Exploited and Forgotten. How One Boy Overcame the Odds. 4.7 out of 5 stars (22)
£3.95
The Trouble with Alex: A Mother's Battle. A Child's Rage.
10% buy
The Trouble with Alex: A Mother's Battle. A Child's Rage. 3.0 out of 5 stars (1)
£5.99
Explore similar items
 

Customer Reviews

10 Reviews
5 star:
 (7)
4 star:
 (1)
3 star:
 (2)
2 star:    (0)
1 star:    (0)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.5 out of 5 stars (10 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
Share your thoughts with other customers:
Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars trauma is the key, 26 April 2008
This is an unusual review as I have only read a synopsis of the book but quickly recognised some very current issues that many families are faced with in adoption today even from such a short precis. Many social workers and psychologists do not understand the connection between disturbed attachments and trauma. Many services offering assistence to alex and her parents were probably not equipped to assist the child. They may have failed to see that the fact that the child can present in many different ways in different situations is indicative of the need for a therapist versed not only in attachment but also in trauma work and dissociation. The quote in the book that says ' even when alex admitted to melanie that her behaviour was controlled by a voice in her head' screams dissociation.

I will now read the book and hopefully I will discover that alex received appropriate therapy from a therapist who began working with her dissociative states and that this also failed. However if I do not it will be a book that generates many feelings. Well done to the parents who try so hard and shame on the services that let children and families down in this way.
Comment Comment | Permalink | Was this review helpful to you? Yes No (Report this)



 
9 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars When will Social Services be held accountable?, 3 April 2008
I was totally absorbed in this book. Definitely a page turner but not for the reasons that I usually read books. Yes I wanted a happy ending for Alex but also wanted Social Services to admit that they hadn't listened to the Allens. I didn't get either ending.
Melanie Allen was truthful and honest about her feelings - so very brave to put them down on paper and face the public with what had already destroyed her family and her peace of mind. She will have to hear people berate them and believe that they could "fix" Alex. If that was the case then I believe that she would have been the 1st one in the queue to do this. The love that she showed came through in the book. Her patience in helping Alex learn her alaphabet was extraordinary. I know that my frustration would have come through much earlier!
This book should be talked about as there are questions that need to be answered and Social Services be asked to justify their actions.
Well done Melanie
Comment Comment | Permalink | Was this review helpful to you? Yes No (Report this)



 
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A reflection of a modern-day adoption experience, 17 Aug 2008
By Caroline V. Rushmer "Caroline" (Cheadle Hulme, Cheshire, UK) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
Melanie Allen's experience is sadly not unique. Modern day adoption is about finding families for deeply traumatised children, children for who a world's worth of love may not be enough to 'cure' their hurts. Hurts which can seriously affect a child's ability to function normally in the world, and especially in a family, and make it almost impossible for them to trust.

Melanie and her husband were typical adopters, full hearts, brimming with hope and a strong desire to 'make a difference' to a child who needed them. They imagined (as so many do) that they would be different; the worst-case-scenario would not happen to them because they would make sure it didn't, and they would have energy and strength enough to spare.

As a foster carer and adopter myself, I did find their expectations of Alex and of adoption were rather high, but again this is not untypical. I also found myself concerned during the first 200 pages about the way in which Melanie managed Alex, realising that she had got the 'needs firm boundaries' message loud and clear but was at risk loosing her reasoning and applying rather draconian discipline to Alex - but once again this is not an unusual scenario. It was not done with malice, but with a real expectation that this was the right thing to do.

Social Services experiences were again so normal as to be predictable to anyone who has had much involvement with them. The Allens weren't believed, they were blamed; vilified even. The Lord save foster carers and adopters from very young, very inexperienced social workers! Real effective help costs BIG money, which social services departments don't have as the Allens discovered. But please don't misunderstand - the system is the problem, not individual social workers.

I read this pretty much at one sitting, as I progressed through the second half of the book my sympathy for the Allens grew, and it was possible to feel their bewilderment as they struggled to make sense of a system that claimed to care but failed to show it with anything other than empty words.

If you found this book compelling, the following book will be of equal interest and give even greater insight as to how early-years neglect or abuse can decimate a child's life.

The Boy Who Was Raised As a Dog: And Other Stories from a Child Psychiatrist's Notebook - What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love, and Healing
Comment Comment | Permalink | Was this review helpful to you? Yes No (Report this)


Share your thoughts with other customers: Create your own review
 
 
 
Most Recent Customer Reviews

3.0 out of 5 stars Average - true life story
I'm sorry to say that compared to other true life stories this book did not really grip me. Most of the other books I have read have all been excellent, but I would only class... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Mrs. L. M. Probyn

4.0 out of 5 stars afraid to go there
I have yet to read this...and I go there with aprehension.

As adoptive parents we live with this, and have just been through the exact same experience with Social... Read more
Published 5 months ago by J. Ferguson

3.0 out of 5 stars good book, but author was a bit impatient with the child
this is a very good book, but a few people wouldnt speak to the author with regard to her treatment of alex,including her sister and i have to agree some of the things she did... Read more
Published 9 months ago by joopoo

5.0 out of 5 stars brilliant book
I did enjoy this book and would recommend it to people. However it left me frustrated with the lack of support the family and alex got. Was wishing for a happy ending. Read more
Published 11 months ago by A. Caddy

5.0 out of 5 stars If you are thinking of adopting read this first
Not just a gripping and disturbing story, this should be required reading for anyone involved in fostering and adoption - prospective parents and professional services alike. Read more
Published 13 months ago by J. MACDONALD

5.0 out of 5 stars Well written, thought provoking book
I read the book cover to cover in just a couple of sittings, just willing the parents to be listened to and Alex to be helped. Read more
Published 14 months ago by Emma Monk

5.0 out of 5 stars Brave and Harrowing true story
After just reading this true story it has left me deeply sad, frustrated and angry but most of all it has regained my belief that there are truly amazing people out there with so... Read more
Published 15 months ago by lucy

Only search this product's reviews


Customer Discussions

 Beta (What's this?)
This product's forum (0 discussions)
  Discussion Replies Latest Post
  No discussions yet

Ask questions, Share opinions, Gain insight
Start a new discussion
Topic:
First post:
Prompts for sign-in
  [Cancel]


Active discussions in related forums
   
Related forums

Listmania!

Create a Listmania! list

Look for similar items by category

Feedback

Health & Beauty at Amazon.co.uk

Elemis Resurface and Renew Skin Care Gift Set of 4 Products
From soap to shavers, massagers to mascara, stock up on your daily essentials or truly pamper yourself.

›Discover Health & Beauty

  

Make A Wish

Get what you want with an Amazon.co.uk Wish List Make sure you always get what you want with an Amazon.co.uk Wish List.

›More info on Wish Lists

  

Up to 53% off Braun Series Shavers

Braun Series 3 390cc Clean & Renew System Rechargeable Foil Electric Shaver
Get in touch with your smooth side with Braun Series shavers, now with Gillette blade technology.

›Discover Braun Series at Amazon.co.uk

  

Treat Someone

Amazon.co.uk Gift Certificates--available in any amount from £5 to £500 With an Amazon.co.uk Gift Certificate, you can get them what they want (even if you don't know what that is).

›Learn more about Gift Certificates

  
Ad

Where's My Stuff?

Delivery and Returns

Need Help?

Your Recent History

  (What's this?)
You have no recently viewed items or searches.

After viewing product detail pages or search results, look here to find an easy way to navigate back to pages you are interested in.

Look to the right column to find helpful suggestions for your shopping session.
Continue Shopping: Top Sellers
The Girl Who Played with Fire
The Girl Who Played with Fire by Stieg Larsson
4.5 out of 5 stars (75)£3.86
 Breaking Dawn (Twilight Saga)
Breaking Dawn (Twilight Saga) by Stephenie Meyer
4.1 out of 5 stars (464)£6.49
 The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson
4.1 out of 5 stars (165)£3.99
 The Host
The Host by Stephenie Meyer
4.2 out of 5 stars (83)£3.86

amazon.co.uk Amazon Home
International Sites:  United States  |  Germany  |  France  |  Japan  |  Canada  |  China
Business Programs: Sell on Amazon  |  Fulfilment by Amazon  |  Join Associates  |  Join Advantage
Customer Service  |  Help  |  View Basket  |  Your Account
About Amazon.co.uk  |  Careers at Amazon
Conditions of Use & Sale |  Privacy Notice  © 1996-2009, Amazon.com, Inc. and its affiliates