Small Steps with Heavy Hooves: A Mother's Walk Back to Health in the Highlands [Illustrated] (Paperback)

In July 1994 I stood on Tower Bridge in an euphoric moment of achievement. I had joined a select band of people who have walked the entire length of Britain's coast, and respect showed in the eyes of those around me. I thought I had undertaken the journey of a lifetime. How wrong I was.

Two years later I became pregnant, was left by the father, gave birth to my son and, four months later, was diagnosed with cancer. These events were to take me on an emotional journey which involved more pain, tears and fatigue than walking Britain's coast ever could. In an effort to come to terms with all this, I did what felt best and went for a walk.

In September 1997 my family and I undertook a journey of catharsis across the Grampian mountain range. Before the reader goes any further, my family, described by some as 'unorthodox', needs some clarification.

The Family

The first confusion arises because my dog is called Tess, I am called Spud, and everyone thinks it should be the other way around. To overcome this, we have become each other's alter ego and share names accordingly. But remember: Tess is the one with four legs, a tail and no inhibitions.

On 23rd June 1996 Tess and I were joined by Barnaby Benjamin. His father had long since decided to jump pregnancy, and Tess became surrogate sibling and part time baby sitter. Four weeks later Ben the horse arrived, and the boys were soon sharing names as frequently as Tess and I.

Then came Rob, the only person willing and able to take on the family in all its muddle. Miraculously he seems to have clung on to his name, at least for the time being.

The Journeys

Barnie was riding before he could walk. Where other eleven month old children rode in buggies, Barnie was strapped into a wicker basket saddle atop Ben and accompanied us on walks in this manner. I had discovered a freedom not available with your average buggy. The Scottish Highlands beckoned.

In September 1997, Barnie, Ben, Tess, Rob and I drove north to Aberlour (on Speyside). The plan was to walk southwards through the Grampians, following old drove roads where possible, with the aim of getting as far south as we could. Barnie rode Ben, who also carried all our food and camping equipment.

This book tells the story of the 150 mile, three week journey from Aberlour to Blairgowrie. But it also tells the other story; the series of events which led to the Highland trip - of single motherhood and coping with cancer.

Not all physical travel takes you to desirable destinations, and so it is with emotional travel.

Some destinations are exotic, some are hard work, many are humbling, most are memorable, all are valuable. The intensity of feeling my own journey evoked took me by surprise and made me appreciate the remarkable journeys that every one of us undertake as part of what we call life.

This is not a travel book in the strict sense; but I am writing this book because I know now that the destination doesn't have to be exclusive to be memorable or fulfilling. I also feel that positive things can come from my experiences and, if they do, then the journey will have been worthwhile.