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How to be a Help Instead of a Nuisance: Practical Approaches to Giving Support, Service and Encouragement to Others

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How to be a Help Instead of a Nuisance: Practical Approaches to Giving Support, Service and Encouragement to Others (Paperback)

by Karen Kissel Wegela (Author)

4.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (1 customer review)

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This item: How to be a Help Instead of a Nuisance: Practical Approaches to Giving Support, Service and Encouragement to Others by Karen Kissel Wegela

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This item: How to be a Help Instead of a Nuisance: Practical Approaches to Giving Support, Service and Encouragement to Others by Karen Kissel Wegela
Usually dispatched within 1 to 3 weeks.
Dispatched from and sold by Amazon.co.uk.
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Being and Becoming: Psychodynamics, Buddhism, and the Origins of Selfhood by Franklyn Sills
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Product details

Paperback: 239 pages
Publisher: Shambhala Publications Inc (3 Jan 1998)
Language English
ISBN-10: 1570621500
ISBN-13: 978-1570621505
Product Dimensions: 21.1 x 14 x 1.3 cm

Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (1 customer review)

Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 85,332 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Product Description

Despite our good intentions to help others, we often hold back because we don't know what to do or are afraid to intrude. Even when we overcome our hesitations, we sometimes find that we have made things worse with our attempts to help. Karen Kissel Wegela combines the insights of traditional meditative practices and modern psychology to address these problems, concluding that the most important thing we can offer to anyone in distress is our mindful presence, without agendas or expectations. When we learn to cultivate this ability to be open-heartedly, compassionately present, we find that we can intelligently apply a variety of skills and techniques, including listening, being mindful companions, and forming supportive teams for individuals and families. We may find that our actions benefit us as much as they do the people we seek to help. This books provides concrete practical advice, with techniques and exercises for developing the capacity to serve, support, and encourage those in need-for people in the helping professions as well as for everybody else who wants to provide genuine help to others.

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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Put your own oxygen mask on first then assist others, 5 Aug 1998

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The author describes helpfulness as a cycle of turning inward to be present with oneself and reaching out to be present with others. The practice of mindfulness meditation underlies the entire cycle so those with some familiarity with sitting meditation or Chogyam Trungpa's Shambhala Training will quickly understand the author's viewpoint. The idea that each person has a basic "brilliant sanity" puts the helper and the client on an even footing, with neurosis or psychosis seen as an imbalance in one of the five qualities of brilliant sanity: openness, richness of experience, clarity, compassion, and skillful action. Many practical suggestions are given for providing a wide variety of help - from simple listening to helpful actions - including how to recognize when you can no longer help and tips on referrals. A compassionate approach to becoming a helpful friend to family members, friends, clients, colleagues, or customers - but especially to yourself.

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