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Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions Are Really Telling Our Children (Pantley) (Paperback)

by Elizabeth Pantley (Author) "Curt, a bright sixteen-year-old, was bursting with excitement over his newly earned driver's licence ..." (more)

4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (3 customer reviews)

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This item: Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions Are Really Telling Our Children (Pantley) by Elizabeth Pantley

In stock.
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How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (How to Help Your Child) (How to Help Your Child) by Adele Faber; Elaine Mazlish

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This item: Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions Are Really Telling Our Children (Pantley) by Elizabeth Pantley
In stock.
Dispatched from and sold by Amazon.co.uk.
This item Delivered FREE in the UK with Super Saver Delivery. See details and conditions
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (How to Help Your Child) (How to Help Your Child) by Adele Faber; Elaine Mazlish
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This item Delivered FREE in the UK with Super Saver Delivery. See details and conditions

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Product details

Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: McGraw-Hill Contemporary (1 Jan 2000)
Language English
ISBN-10: 0809297701
ISBN-13: 978-0809297702
Product Dimensions: 22.4 x 15.7 x 1.3 cm

Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (3 customer reviews)

Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 136,208 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Product Description

What are you really telling your children?

Elizabeth Pantley, the creator of the bestselling No-Cry parenting books, shows you how to improve the hidden messages behind your words and deeds. She shares with you other parents' stories that demonstrate how they unknowingly sent their kids negative messages through their words and actions. After each story she provides a gentle lesson by showing the child's perspective on the same scenario and offers suggestions for a positive outcome.

From the Back Cover

Even the best-informed parents will be shocked to discover that they have unintentionally been sending their kids the wrong messages. In this book, these hidden messages are revealed through intriguing stories that will make you laugh, cry, and reflect upon your own family life. Hidden Messages will teach you about yourself and encourage you to look at what's really going on between you and your children. Through specific action plans, it will help you uncover the best ways to raise your children to be happy, successful people.

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Inside This Book (Learn More)

First Sentence
Curt, a bright sixteen-year-old, was bursting with excitement over his newly earned driver's licence. Read the first page

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	38% buy the item featured on this page: Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions Are Really Telling Our Children (Pantley) 4.3 out of 5 stars (3) �6.10
	17% buy Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves 4.8 out of 5 stars (9) �10.23
	16% buy How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (How to Help Your Child) (How to Help Your Child) 4.7 out of 5 stars (59) �6.69
	16% buy Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason 4.1 out of 5 stars (14) �5.98

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Customer Reviews

3 Reviews

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4.3 out of 5 stars (3 customer reviews)

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74 of 74 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Discover what you are really saying to your children!, 5 Feb 2001

By	Jill Curtis "jillcurtis3" (london) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

Have you have just come from refereeing one more fight between the children? Are you lying down on your bed from exhaustion after dashing from school, to the shops, to the laundry, to the gym, and picked up the dry-cleaning on the way back? Oh, and did you pick up the wet towels in the bathroom on the way back? What about the gym shoes left on the stairs?

If this is what your routine is like, then Elizabeth Pantley has written Hidden Messages just for you. She divides the book into different topics, or 'flash points', those factors which arise in many households such as The New Baby, Superwoman, Manners, and more. How do we pass on messages about responsibility, independence, thoughtfulness and kindness without nagging? She describes scenes which may be horribly familiar to you, then decodes the hidden message we have given our children, and suggests alternatives.

In this way she explains what our words and actions are really telling our children. Some of these examples may make you blush, and others make you gasp in horror as you recall using those very words this morning!

Once you see what she is saying, the rest falls into place. She doesn't preach, but she gently explains how we hand over the wrong messages to the kids when we say certain things, and how much easier it is for the children, and the parents, if we can truly say what we mean.

This book will make you stop and reconsider the effect your words have on your children. Buy it, you won't regret it. And, in the long term, neither will your children!

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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Subtle, creative way to get the message about raising children across , 24 Aug 2006

By	S. Kausar (Birmingham, UK) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This might be the hundredth book on parenting I have read, and I was not disappointed.
The book is very concise, which is great because if like me you are working as well as being a parent...
Each story covers a theme such as battling siblings, dealing appropriately with neighbours who have different ways of raising their children, developing independence and life-skills in your children. It is easy to follow because the stories which are oh so familiar are very concise, without taking away anything from the quality of the lesson being passed on. Each story is followed by a paragraph stating the subtle message being given and then the reader is advised what to do about it. The stories cover all ages, from babies to teenagers. As well as everything else, I was impressed by the sheer range of issues and age groups covered.
As it does not take weeks to read (like some parenting books I have come across) you actually remember the lessons taught while you read the book and for some time after finishing it.
My child is too young and so far an only child, so many of the stories don't apply. But that may be an advantage-I get time to re-read it and make sure our family doesn't become one of those featured in the book!

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3.0 out of 5 stars Good but obvous, 2 Sep 2009

By	Olga "First time mom" (UK) - See all my reviews

While the book is indeed promoting loving and unconditional parenting, and must be a great inspiration and eye opener for a lot of parents, I personally found the "hidden messages" to be quite obvious. Yet again, I've read lots and know children developmental psycology quite well, so it didn't impressed me, but I do recommend it, especially if you haven't had tons of parenting books read.

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