The Alphabet of Manliness: Amazon.co.uk: Maddox: Books

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Alphabet manliness

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Product Description
Finally, a book that guarantees your balls will be stomped; a book so manly that it will make even the burliest of men (and in some cases, the burliest of women) feel inadequate. So manly, it needs to be shaved: "The Alphabet of Manliness". This collection of sacred writings may very well be the greatest compilation of all things manly throughout history. This book is only for the saltiest, hairiest, most rugged son of a bitch out there. However, it would be selfish to keep it for myself, so feel free to buy a copy. This humble tome of wisdom is a tribute to all men who toil away at work every day, getting their balls busted, or busting balls. If you can't handle the punch to the colon I'm about to deliver to you, look on the bright side: you'll save a fortune on Halloween when kids come to your door to pick apart your candy ass. On the other hand, if you feel comfortable with the risk of having your ass neatly packaged and handed to you with all the trimmings, cut the foreplay and crack the book open already.

Inside This Book (Learn More)

First Sentence
THE PHRASE "ASS KICKING" has changed over the years from its humble origin as the union of one's foot with another person's ass, to an expression today that has nothing to do with asses, or even kicking. Read the first page

Browse Sample Pages
Front Cover | Copyright | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover

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Customer Reviews

22 Reviews

5 star:		(10)
4 star:		(6)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(1)

Average Customer Review

3.9 out of 5 stars (22 customer reviews)

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41 of 45 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Not as Biblical as you might expect, 13 Jul 2006

By	D. Moss "systemj" (UK) - See all my reviews (TOP 1000 REVIEWER) (REAL NAME)

If this were a proper review, I'd start by introducing Maddox to the readership. However, it isn't. If you don't know who Maddox is- visit his site. There's enough to keep you reading for hours on end, some of it truly hilarious. There's also no point in paying to read an unknown author when there's a vast supply of free sample material online. The first "buy or not" decision comes as soon as you read his site. If you don't find that funny, there's absolutely no point in reading this book.

To everyone who is already instantly familiar with Maddox: when this book was announced it seemed like a huge event, especially as the man himself gave it plenty of tongue-in-cheek over-hype. If you're expecting the medium of a book to expand the scope and quality of his humour, you'll be dissapointed. The Alphabet of Manliness is not funnier than his site, and neither is it significantly different in overall style of humour.

So what is it? It centres entirely on one of Maddox's avenues of humour: manliness. Disguised as a glossary come self-help are 26 comic articles on everything from Chuck Norris (the geek staple) to Urinal Etiquette, aided by loads of well-drawn pictures (by pro artists rather than the hand-drawn stuff Maddox uses on his own site) and some faux-mathematical charts. And that's it really - a couple of hundred pages of funny walk-throughs to machismo related subjects. Essentially you're paying for a concentrated and portable dose of Maddox rather than something new or innovative.

The principle problem with this is that it narrows Maddox's humour down to a pretty limited set of topics. There's no room for his disgusted rants against most of popular culture, no hilarious film reviews, no dismissal of children's art/idiotic mail. Very little of his observational humour on a variety of iritating everyday things get a look in (although the Irate entry provides a condensed version).

One thing that is important to note is that The Alphabet of Manliness is not part of this American resurgance of machismo in reaction to metrosexuality. If anything, this is a parody of those values: a grossly exaggerated charicature of macho fuelled by the fact that Maddox is someone who would like to smash up the mundanity of life. He recognises the stupidity of masculinity as much as the subjects he attacks with it. Don't be put off by the notion that this is for macho men and it's about macho men. All the humour is derived from male-orientated topics, but there's nothing here to turn away feminine readers. All you need to get a good laugh out of the knowledge that all the offensive content is not genuine or malicious. And the acceptance that you're just getting a monstrous entry of his website in book form rather than something revolutionary, of course.

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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars The Book its everything you expected, 25 Jun 2006

By	H. Tekdogan (London, England) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This book is fantastic, but i must stress do not take anything in it seriously, if your pretty religious like i am you may be offended in some parts, but on the whole this book was hilarious and its "rocked my face off" as Maddox would put it. If you are used to reading his material online you will notice the book is different in the style of writting but this is only because your used to electronic, its still as witty and sarcastic as any article that came before. Ok some parts have been rehashed and you would have read it before, infact some jokes have been borrowed from films and is the only reason it gets a 4 and not a 5 on this occassion.

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19 of 22 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Incredible and fascinating, 2 Oct 2006

By	Refik Topsever (Atlanta) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I bet you will be speechless right after you read the first few pages. They are that astonishing, original and provocative. I laughed out loud so many times because this is one of the very best humoristic book I have ever laid eyes on and I am an avid reader. My impressions about the author and his great entertainment are entirely based on this truly very, very manly book. It is organized into 26 small sections, one for each letter of the alphabet.

I am sure that you won't be able to put it down after you read just the first one dedicated to A** kicking. I don't know whether you will grow extra hair and your testosterone will skyrocket after you read the book but I am sure that you will be thrilled to have a copy of it and reread it again and again. Additional bestseller worth praising as well is "Scientificlly guaranteed male multiple orgasms and ultimate sex". I dare say that these books are a great pair and will open your eyes for so many "must know" manly secrets. Keep it up.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars Overall an entertaining and enjoyable book
Humorous, uncensored degradation. To sum up in three words, they would be perfect. I was contemplating whether or not to buy this book as i had read Maddox's writing on site and... Read more

Published 23 months ago by Lewis Hiley

5.0 out of 5 stars The Greatest Book in the World
Are you slightly insecure about your manhood? Do you think that reading a book might help you become more... grrr? If so, this book is not for you. Read more

Published on 16 Jun 2007 by Butch Simonsen

5.0 out of 5 stars Big Fan
I am a big, big [...] fan and this book is everything I expected and more. Ah, to be able to do the things [...] imagines... What will he think of next? Read more

Published on 25 April 2007 by Marco Polo

2.0 out of 5 stars Maddox falls way too short of the mark
I would love to write a review of this book, stating how well it's written and how dazzlingly brilliant the author is, but I just can't. Read more

Published on 7 April 2007 by Mr. Mma Williams

2.0 out of 5 stars If this wasn't Maddox...
no one would give the guy a rating above 3 stars. It's an average book. I found some funny moments towards the end, but overall, it doesn't impress. Read more

Published on 28 Nov 2006 by A. HILL

2.0 out of 5 stars Didn't even reach juvenille
I bought this book thinking it would be a nicely warped and sideway view of life and a laugh out loud read. Read more

Published on 14 Sep 2006 by R. King

4.0 out of 5 stars Contemporary comic genius...
I, like thousands of people all over the world, have been a fan of Maddox, and his website, which went from cult success to internet phenomenon, for a fairly long time now. Read more

Published on 9 Sep 2006 by Mds Davis

5.0 out of 5 stars If You Like The Website, You'll Like This.
I'll keep this one pretty simple, if you're not sure if this book is for you. Go to Maddox's website, read some articles, If you find Maddox insulting, childish or simply not... Read more

Published on 6 Sep 2006 by Richard Nesbitt

4.0 out of 5 stars Don't let a woman near it
A mostly very funny book with parts to help you sleep.

Published on 5 Sep 2006 by Andy

4.0 out of 5 stars Chuck Norris.....what a legend!!!
I had been unfamiliar with Maddox before this book, but I'll certainly be checking out his website and other titles of his. Read more

Published on 3 Aug 2006 by A. Fitzgerald

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	61% buy the item featured on this page: The Alphabet of Manliness 3.9 out of 5 stars (22)
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