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The Brentford Chainstore Massacre
 
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The Brentford Chainstore Massacre (Hardcover)

by Robert Rankin (Author)
4.1 out of 5 stars See all reviews (11 customer reviews)

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Paperback (New edition) £7.99 £5.99 42 used & new from £0.01

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Product details

  • Hardcover: 328 pages
  • Publisher: Doubleday (4 Dec 1997)
  • Language English
  • ISBN-10: 0385407076
  • ISBN-13: 978-0385407076
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.co.uk Sales Rank: 607,668 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    Popular in this category:

    #48 in  Books > Fiction > Authors, A-Z > R > Rankin, Robert

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Product Description

Product Description
There is nothing more powerful than a bad idea whose time has come. And there can be few ideas less bad or more potentially apocalyptic than that hatched by genetic scientist Dr Stephen Malone. Using DNA strands extracted from the dried blood on the Turin Shroud, Dr Malone is cloning Jesus.

From the Back Cover
'Jim took himself to his favourite bench before the Memorial Library. It was here, on this almost sacred spot, that Jim did most of his really heavyweight thinking. Here where he dreamed his dreams and made his plans...'

There is nothing more powerful than a bad idea whose time has come. And there can be few ideas less bad or more potentially apocalyptic than that hatched by genetic scientist Dr Steven Malone. Using DNA strands extracted from the dried blood on the Turin Shroud, Dr Malone is cloning Jesus. And not just a single Jesus, he's going for a full half-dozen so that each of the world's major religions can have one. It's a really bad idea.

In Brentford they've had a really good idea. They're holding the Millennial celebrations two years early to avoid the rush and it promises to be the party of this, or any other, century. Unless, of course, something REALLY BAD were to happen... --This text refers to the Paperback edition.

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What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item?

The Brentford Chainstore Massacre
60% buy the item featured on this page:
The Brentford Chainstore Massacre 4.1 out of 5 stars (11)
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Customer Reviews

11 Reviews
5 star:
 (6)
4 star:
 (2)
3 star:
 (1)
2 star:
 (2)
1 star:    (0)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.1 out of 5 stars (11 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars The best of Brentford Trilogy?, 24 May 2003
By dogbarkssome (England) - See all my reviews
(TOP 100 REVIEWER)      
This review is from: The Brentford Chainstore Massacre (Brentford Trilogy) (Paperback)
After the amusing but slightly under whelming Sprouts of Wrath Rankin returns with the 5th (and so far final) book in the Brentford Trilogy. I’m mystified as to some of the negative comments here; as far as I’m concerned this book has it all. It starts with the best premise of any – the cloning of Jesus Christ from blood on the Turin Shroud, coupled with some of the most inspired lunacy I’ve ever read from Robert Rankin. This isn’t plot heavy, and Rankin knows just when to take his foot off the pedal and concentrate on the humour. Its got a great story, its funny as hell, and it contains some fine writing. What more could you ask for?
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars The Brentford series deserves a better last volume., 15 Jun 2001
By Nigel Collier (Newcastle upon Tyne) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)      
This review is from: The Brentford Chainstore Massacre (Brentford Trilogy) (Paperback)
I really can't add anything that Alan Thirsk has not already said in his excellent review, I can only concur. I am a huge fan of the Brentford books; the Antipope was very good, the Brentford Triangle absolutely superb, I think East of Ealing was _relatively_ weak but we were back on track with the Sprouts of Wrath - good, solid Rankin.

I'd enjoyed all 4 books so much that, pessimist that I am, I was waiting for the bubble to burst. I would say that with 'Chainstore', though the bubble has defnitiely gone 'pop' it IS still a Brentford book and still worthy of 3 stars.

The plot of the book is as strong and imaginitive as any of the previous four; but the previous reviewer is right on the money when he writes that its handling is, "just too flippant and loose". The book is full of stupid asides, between author and reader, about the book. I got the feeling whilst reading this that Rankin knew the book was way short of the mark, and his self-conscious asides just undermined the story from the word go. When the plot reached a cul-de-sac Rankin would need to rescue it with a conspicuous bodge job, and then he'd joke with the reader with a note to the effect, "I know that bit was ropey but I can't really be bothered". I can't help feeling that a Rankin at the top of his form would have ignored the inconsistencies and ploughed un unabashed - or written a tighter story to start with.

The use of the main characters was poor - with Pooley and Omally being separated for much of the book - most unwise. Rankin also seemed to be attempting to make up for lack of content with really squirmingly corny jokes - he literally lost of the plot.

Though I'm a great fan of the Brentford books I really don't like Rankin's other books and Alan Thirsk is absolutely right in saying that 'Chainstore' is more like the latter than the former in its style. I hope Rankin can come up with a more enthusiastic and faithful book to end what has been an outstanding series.

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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars anti-climax, 21 Dec 2000
By A. Thirsk (Scotland) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: The Brentford Chainstore Massacre (Brentford Trilogy) (Paperback)
If this is the last ever Brentford adventure, then it is a serious anti climax. I have been a fan of the pooley/O malley adventures for many years and was looking forward to this fifth book. Although the initial idea for the plot is a stunner(a mad geneticist clones six Jesus Christ's) it never really goes anywhere. The story line is just too flippant and loose to grip the reader. The baddies are just too stupid and some of the main characters just don't seem to be themselves. Professor Slocombe seems to be unsympathetic to our heroes plight(the beating from the police), Neville is not particularly friendly(strange since Pooley was supposed to buy him the Flying Swan at the end of 'The sprouts of wrath'), and Pete is now a barroom bore telling jokes that would make the reader cringe. The writing style seems to be different from the previous four books and is more akin to the 'Armaggedon' series which I never liked. Too rediculous to be funny. It's a shame,this book started ok but quickly fell apart at the seams. I will certainly be warey of buying any Robert Rankin books in the future.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Rankin's best?
As someone who enjoys Rankin's work, but who doesn't feel that he always writes to his potential, this was a welcome and pleasant surprise. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Mr. I. S. Fairholm

4.0 out of 5 stars Signing off
Rankin returns with the final instalment of the Brentford trilogy. Its a typical outing, Rankin is the kind of author who as a narrator will virtually chat to his characters, who... Read more
Published 13 months ago by aceadrian

4.0 out of 5 stars Decent end(?) to the trilogy
If this is to be the final novel in the Brentford series of books then its a satisfatory climax. Not one of Rankins best though I think. Read more
Published on 8 Feb 2005 by Lendrick

5.0 out of 5 stars Best, worst and only rankin book I read!
This is a superb book with an excellent plot, the characters are funny, expesscialy the 'Lady in the straw hat'. Read more
Published on 12 Aug 2001

2.0 out of 5 stars Not Rankins best
I was looking forward to this as the characters of Pooley and O'Malley are always good for a laugh. But what went wrong? Read more
Published on 30 Jul 2000

5.0 out of 5 stars funny looks...
this being my first Robert rankin book and all, i was pretty keen to read it, having several people tellme how good this guy was. Read more
Published on 25 Dec 1999

5.0 out of 5 stars A grand finale to a legendary trilogy
I waited a long time for this book and it ties everything up nicely. John Omally and Jim Pooley return with a bang, not to mention the usual array of bruises. Read more
Published on 21 Nov 1999 by Thurstan Johnston

5.0 out of 5 stars Oi, Rankin... get your own lines.
Some years ago, in a copy of Amiga Format, I reviewed Zool from Gremlin Graphics. In one section, talking about the DIY level of the game, I mentioned that Zool was in his own... Read more
Published on 27 Oct 1998

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