A Wide-eyed new-ager's trite journey of self-discovery, 5 April 1999

If you're willing to believe that a guy from Taiwan can have you mumble some Chinese you don't understand and that this will make sure you achieve Nirvana in this lifetime (for a suitable fee, no doubt), you're on a par with Melody.

If you let your hairdresser bleach your hair because "he said my auric field was lightening and it would help to have my hair lighter too, for a while," you're one with Melody.

And what happens in the end? She goes to Master Huang, pays the fee, "gets her Tao", and receives the three secrets, "traced back to their biblical origins", but of course Taoism is completely unrelated to the Judeo-christian tradition, a fact which Melody never bothered to research.

And what are the three secrets? Well, you'd better find Master Huang and pay your fee if you want to find out. Melody, after all that, isn't telling.

I found this book in a box left out in front of a used book store. It was a waste of time, but at least not a waste of money -- I didn't pay any.

Rather than leaving this book out for someone else to waste time on, I'm going to recycle it. Mulched up and made into paper bags, it will be performing a far better service than in its current incarnation.

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