The Dance (Paperback)

I have sent you my invitation,
the note inscribed on the palm of my hand by the fire of living.
Don't jump up and shout, 'Yes, this is what I want! Let's do it!'
Just stand up quietly and dance with me.

The initial draft of the first seven chapters of The Dance was a desperate prayer calling out to the universe, I want to know why I am so infrequently the person I so sincerely want to be. Then one night one of the elders who has appeared in my dreams for over fifteen years, one of those I call the Grandmothers, came and spoke to me while I slept. 'Wrong question Oriah, ' she said. 'The question is not why are you so infrequently the person you really want to be. The question is why do you so infrequently want to be the person you really are.' She paused. 'Because you have no faith that who you are is enough.' Her voice was soft with sadness. 'But it is. Your true nature as human beings is compassionate and this essential nature makes you capable of being intimately and fully present. Who you really are is enough.'

There would never be any erasing the knowledge I had in that moment, that what the Grandmother was telling me was true: who we are by our essential nature is enough; we are right now, in this moment, capable of being compassionate and fully present in intimate relationships; there is no need for self-improvement; we live our deepest soul's desires not by intending to change who we are but by intending to be who we are.

And clearly our intention - to change or to be - profoundly shapes how we live, what we believe we must learn, whether we feel we must ceaselessly push ourselves to reach higher or simply find the courage and confidence to allow who we are to unfold. The latter view calls for choices that support and expand our essentially compassionate nature while the former aims to reshape our essentially flawed nature with heroic efforts of endless trying.

I recently sat in on a presentation given to corporate coaches, folks who work with displaced CEO's and corporate executives. The presenter, a bright and entertaining motivational speaker, was not talking about increasing profits or acquiring more material possessions. He was questioning the usefulness of these goals in our lives and talking instead about living more fully everyday, an intention that echoed my own. But as he urged his audience with real evangelical zeal to 'go the extra mile' in living more fully, to become better parents, better coaches, better executives, to get up an hour early to exercise, to get up two hours early to meditate and exercise... I could feel myself becoming exhausted just listening to him. And as I looked at the quiet, tired faces of the men and women in the audience - men and women already running on too little sleep and too much caffeine - I felt an insurmountable heaviness in my limbs.

I could feel myself agreeing with him: yes, these were all the things I would have to do to be consistent with my intention to live fully. And I knew right then and there that I was not going to make it, that I would never be good enough or disciplined enough to do all the things I would have to do to consistently live my soul's longings or this man's aspirations. I simply didn't have the energy to make all necessary upgrades within myself.

Weary and discouraged, I was contemplating returning to the free breakfast buffet for another high fat croissant - because what the hell I was never going to do half of what I should anyway so why not - when the speaker said something that woke me up. With absolute conviction he said, 'The harder you are on yourself, the easier life will be on you!' Something inside of me snapped awake. I knew this was rubbish. He was offering a deal: if you drive yourself, life will reward you. And in a flash I knew that this was the inevitable place where I would land over and over again, driving my body and heart to the point of exhaustion in the hopes of the ever-elusive inner spiritual make-over - if I thought the central question was why are we so infrequently the people we really want to be? And if success is at best unlikely, the only hope is a deal, a magical formula that offers a promise that keeps us on the treadmill of self-improvement in the hopes that someone or something will see our effort and grant us a boon. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

• Books > Health, Family & Lifestyle > Psychology & Psychiatry
• Books > Mind, Body & Spirit
• Books > Religion & Spirituality > Spirituality
• Books > Society, Politics & Philosophy > Psychology Textbooks

• Would you like to update product info or give feedback on images?
• I am the Author, and I want to comment on my book.
• I am the Publisher, and I want to comment on this book.