Well, they say WE, the devastated are to read everything we can get our hands on to understand THEIR DISEASE. So, I did that. I read and read, with what felt like two broken legs, two broken arms, an eye patch, a brain injury, cracked sternum, and perforated heart. (Emotionally speaking that is..........) All that came of the books I read on this subject was even MORE TRAUMA. This is the ONLY book out there folks to read if you are feeling the lowest low of your life due to the betrayal. If you are sitting there with an STD and a heart made of swiss cheese, an addict that is still righteous in their wrongness "crazymaking", who looked on line at things that you didn't even know existed? If you can barely get your kids to school, remember where you put your keys, don't care to put makeup on or go to the grocery store to trigger off a darned magazine cover- if this is you, ...............buy this book. Actually, buy atleast three if you can afford it, and I will say why: The first one, you will probably mark up and underline to death.(don't want our addict to see how much we despise them in our notes- (or we would be called shaming, and toxic) If you are triggering off the whole world after disclosure you need this to validate that you are exactly where you are supposed to be in this stage of grief and trauma. The second one, you will want your addict to read in helping them GET IT - which will also aide them in their fourth step - which is where they are supposed to be able to see what all they have done, and with whose blood they paid the bill with - (which some never will, but we try don't we- when we have kids to these folks and arent sure if we do or don't have the strength to stay in this hell?) You may even buy a third of fourth copy to hand to those people closest to you, so they too can understand what you are going through. I would not see a CSAT therapist now, that was not following this trauma model for healing me. Hopefully, this will be your lifes lowest low and its up from here. Though this book doesn't have any magic pill in it, it describes the process of what is available in the most divine way, and it validates that we aren't as sick as our addict (That one makes me mad - some of us are just super great people that had impeccable liars in our midst sucking our lives right out from under us with their eyes, mind and lies. I think PC needs to update his treatment. We are not co-addict sickos because we had good deceivers, and if I am looking at my husbands journal, that doesnt make me sick, just a darned good mom protecting my kids from a man that is very ill in his disease. I am called to protect my children, and I will!) When you read this book, you can tell these gals have walked our walk, and you will aim to talk their talk. I find it interesting, that one left their addict, and one stayed. This is a great perspective. I just wish a few things, one, the cover triggered me. I hate anything with sexual pictures or nudity. I wish they chose another cover, but it probably wouldn't sell as many copies. I hate that it would trigger my husband and now I want to hide my new "Bible." Second, I wish there was a chapter or two on what the brain impaired addict can do on an hourly, daily basis to try to begin consoling our pain. Not even inpatient treatment centers teach this to the addict and God himself knows they need a roadmap or two! My overall feelings other than that, it is a Super book. The only one to buy if you are overwhelmed with despair, confusion and aren't sure you want to read about perversion any longer. They did a great job not using triggering stories or words, so that both the addict and the betrayed can enjoy this book. BUY IT. YOU WILL BE GLAD YOU DID. Just cover the front with a bookcover so your addict doesn't [...]to it after reading it.That had to be the only thing they didn't pray about. The inside contents were laid out with impeccable grace and it flows.