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You Better Not Cry: True Stories for Christmas

You Better Not Cry: True Stories for Christmas [Kindle Edition]

Augusten Burroughs
3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)

Kindle Price: £4.19 includes VAT* & free wireless delivery via Amazon Whispernet
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Product Description


"'Outrageous... you wouldn't want him as a godfather for your children but he is damn funny.' Observer 'Burroughs is a natural storyteller... as brilliantly witty, waspish and self-deprecating as ever.' Daily Mail 'A hilarious and skilled raconteur - he's so awful, it's hard not to like him.' Metro"

Product Description

Of course you've eaten too much chocolate at Christmas, but have you ever eaten the face off a six-foot-stuffed Santa? You've seen gingerbread houses, but have you ever made your own gingerbread block of flats? You've woken up with a hangover, but have you ever woken up lying next to Kris Kringle himself? Augusten Burroughs has, and in this caustically funny, nostalgic, poignant, and moving collection of true stories, he recounts Christmases past and present - as only he can.

With gimlet-eyed wit, Augusten Burroughs shows how Christmas can bring out the worst in us and sometimes - just sometimes - the very, very best.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 429 KB
  • Print Length: 225 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0312341911
  • Publisher: Atlantic Books (1 Aug 2011)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B007KA1GQK
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Average Customer Review: 3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #178,905 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Disappointing. 20 Dec 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I've always liked Burrough's novels, and I've read his original four novels quite a few times and they remains as funny as when I first read them, but this christmas themed book definitely feels like a simple cash-in for the holidays. The book is also very short, with lots of blank space on the page. The page count could easily have been cut in half by taking up more space, and this will only last you two hours at the most.

The stories are also somewhat jarring, as if the book is split into two sections. The first few stories have some genuinely funny moments from his childhood, like the confusion of whether Jesus and Santa are the same person, and when his attempt at making a gingerbread house ends up more resembling a crack den.
These first few stories have an innocence to them that lends to humour well, but after that there are stories about having one night stands with a random Santa Claus twice his age, and a story where he sleeps with 'the bum's during Christmas Eve, that aren't particularly funny, or as scandalous as the author seems to want them to be.

Overall, I'd give three stars to the first three or four stories, but only one star to the final three. Disappointing
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Getting a little contrived now 7 Jan 2010
By K-Pax
I am a huge fan of Augusten Burroughs and have enjoyed all of his books so far. However, I was rather disappointed reading this. It does have the feel of a book rushed out in time for Christmas i.e. it is not really that funny and at times it feels rather forced and contrived. I suppose Burroughs has made a rod for his own back with some brilliant books previously but this one is a little stale and that is a shame.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Merry Christmas Memoirs... Sort of... 27 Dec 2010
By Simon Savidge Reads TOP 1000 REVIEWER
`You Better Not Cry' is like a festive special of some of the memories of Augusten Burroughs at various points in his life. From his childhood, which you may have already read about in the brilliant `Running with Scissors' - if you haven't read it then do, to his adulthood we get a glimpse of some of the most vivid and often rather hilarious but tragic Christmas moments. Stories like when his Grandmother had to point out the difference between Santa and Jesus as a younger Augusten thought they were one and the same person (which had caused some rather confused childhood moments), to waking up during his drink filled years to find a Santa suit and a naked Santa look-a-like in his bed (which had me laughing a lot) and to the year he realised he hadn't celebrated Christmas for a decade, well not properly.

I really enjoyed this collection it has to be said, and started to rather annoy my family members as I was croakily giggling between chocolates on the sofa during this Christmas. I loved hearing more about his drug addled mother and alcoholic father and how they tried to make Christmas perfect... and failed slightly and in some ways the fact this book was over his lifetime so far at different points made it all the more interesting, it was less concentrated that some of his other books which whilst funny can really get to you at the same point. There is a tinge of sadness around each of the tales in this collection, it's not all `look at how hilarious and crazy my life has been and oh how we laughed' it has a sensitive and often poignant side too reminding you what Christmas is all about... family and loved ones, no matter how much they can sometimes be a burden.
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5.0 out of 5 stars very good 4 April 2013
By millie
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
very very good can not thing off any think more to say than good or brilliant enjoyed it very much
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3.0 out of 5 stars Not bad. 13 Jan 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
Not a bad piece of writing. Though why it comes under comedy I'm unsure. I suppose the first chapter or 2 is fairly amusing... But it is actually quite sad for most part! Worth a read, but certainly not the light hearted piece of holiday reading I expected!
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