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49 of 49 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Never Too Old To Learn!, 18 Jun 2008
At 61yrs old, with two failed marriages and umpteen other "relationships" with men who were unavailable for many different reasons, I have finally realised what has been going on - I have just been recreating the non relationship with my father who abandoned us when I was 2yrs old, leaving me with a mother who suffered severe depression throughout my childhood, before killing herself when I was nineteen. This book just helped me so much, not just with my "relationship addiction" but with many other aspects of my "addictive personality". It was a book that you read once and then want to go back and start from the beginning again! Downsides are the title (how "American" and corny - I'm embarrassed for anyone to see it), and the fact that, in common with all US self-help books, the author assumes that the reader has ready access to a personal therapist and/or an appropriate 12 steps programme, which many of us in the UK haven't. Finally (though I can hardly blame her for this!), she does warn that this is no easy fix, and could take years, so I think my chances of being in a healthy and fulfilling relationship this side of the grave are small - having said that, maybe that's better than going through all that pain yet again? At least this time I'll be putting my effort, energy and love into healing myself.
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61 of 63 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The first step in your recovery!, 14 Jun 2002
This review is from: Women Who Love Too Much (Paperback)
So, you've been through a bad time, you can't seem to come out the other side smiling , or maybe you can't even find the way out. So you are recommended to buy 'women who love too much'. You sit, you read, you cry, you read and somewhere, fairly near the start of the book, you realise that you are reading about yourself. So cleverly worded it is too that you realise that once you posess this book, you have in fact taken the first step in your addiction recovery, You need to keep it as a reference point because the journey that you're on now will be the hardest one you have ever embarked upon, believe me, I'm doing it while you read. But it will work and now you are on the right road....
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15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The key that opened the door to understanding..., 25 Feb 2009
A friend of mine recommended this book to me after a recent breakup as she said she thought of me the entire time she was reading. Once I began reading it I could see why!! This book completely opened my eyes as to why I was experiencing all of the terrible treatment and abuse in relationships I had, and the reasons I felt so lonely and 'on hold' when I wasn't in a relationship, and felt if only I could meet the right guy all my problems would be solved. All of my life, I believed the problem was me and I was just an overly sensitive person who did all of the 'right' things and was just unlucky in love, however, after reading this book I realised I was only a product of situations out of my control and there was an alternate, happier way to live. I feel fortunate to have discovered this book at 35 years of age, as although it has taken a failed marriage and numerous abusive relationships to get to this stage, I'm glad I have discovered this while still young and not in the later stages of life like many other women. This book has given me the freedom to know my life and relationships don't have to be this way! Although I have not had a good relationship with a man as yet (but am proud to say I have made 'me' my top priority, and have turned away many unsuitable relationships quickly!) the quality of my life has improved dramatically and I no longer have the lonely, needy feeling that was constantly a part of me. I am so much happier and fulfilled in myself, and will be forever grateful.
In addition to this book, I have also been in therapy and sought the help recommended and have read further to develop my understanding and recovery. Other books I can recommend that have helped me immensely are: Toxic Parents, Too Good for her own good, How to spot a dangerous man and Why Does he do that?. The final book was an amazing book about abusive men.
My journey has not been easy and is continuing day by day, but this book was the start of my ability to help myself, by allowing me to understand I wasn't alone and there were reasons that were not my fault that could be rectified to allow me to have a healthy, happy relationship with myself and others. I highly recommend this book, and can't thank my friend enough for telling me about it. It has changed my life!
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