A friend of mine recommended this book to me after a recent breakup as she said she thought of me the entire time she was reading. Once I began reading it I could see why!! This book completely opened my eyes as to why I was experiencing all of the terrible treatment and abuse in relationships I had, and the reasons I felt so lonely and 'on hold' when I wasn't in a relationship, and felt if only I could meet the right guy all my problems would be solved. All of my life, I believed the problem was me and I was just an overly sensitive person who did all of the 'right' things and was just unlucky in love, however, after reading this book I realised I was only a product of situations out of my control and there was an alternate, happier way to live. I feel fortunate to have discovered this book at 35 years of age, as although it has taken a failed marriage and numerous abusive relationships to get to this stage, I'm glad I have discovered this while still young and not in the later stages of life like many other women. This book has given me the freedom to know my life and relationships don't have to be this way! Although I have not had a good relationship with a man as yet (but am proud to say I have made 'me' my top priority, and have turned away many unsuitable relationships quickly!) the quality of my life has improved dramatically and I no longer have the lonely, needy feeling that was constantly a part of me. I am so much happier and fulfilled in myself, and will be forever grateful.
In addition to this book, I have also been in therapy and sought the help recommended and have read further to develop my understanding and recovery. Other books I can recommend that have helped me immensely are: Toxic Parents, Too Good for her own good, How to spot a dangerous man and Why Does he do that?. The final book was an amazing book about abusive men.
My journey has not been easy and is continuing day by day, but this book was the start of my ability to help myself, by allowing me to understand I wasn't alone and there were reasons that were not my fault that could be rectified to allow me to have a healthy, happy relationship with myself and others. I highly recommend this book, and can't thank my friend enough for telling me about it. It has changed my life!