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Will I Ever Be Good Enough?: Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers [Hardcover]

Karyl McBride
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (60 customer reviews)

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Product details

  • Hardcover: 243 pages
  • Publisher: Free Press (23 Sep 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1416551328
  • ISBN-13: 978-1416551324
  • Product Dimensions: 22.9 x 16 x 2.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (60 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 423,005 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
44 of 44 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A life saver for me. 1 Aug 2011
Until reading this book I was going through sheer hell. I could not understand why my mother behaves the way she does. Since reading this book, so many things about my childhood, teenage and adult years now make so much more sense. I no longer blame myself for the failures I was accused of and am in a much better position to live my life in the way I want to, no longer trying to please a woman who will never, ever be pleased.

For me, this book opened the door of my prison cell.
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25 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Mind Blowing 7 April 2011
By Siobhan
brilliant book - very helpful and sound advice on how to deal with all issues that your left having to deal with from growing up with a awful mother.
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118 of 123 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Worth adding to your collection 27 Feb 2009
If you've spent all your adult life desperately trying to get your mother's approval, and wearing yourself out trying to achieve her eternally changing levels of perfection, then I'm sure, like me, you have a library full of these kind of self help books.
Karyl McBride's book is one of the useful ones - there were loads of examples which rang a bell with me. Like a woman who had made her mother a gift, which got put in the bottom of a drawer, because it 'didn't go' with the decor.
One idea I have found a little creepy, is the suggestion that we should buy a doll that represents us as a child, and we 'mother' the doll like we feel we should have been mothered. I can see what she is trying to achieve, I know I was never allowed to be pretty or choose my own clothes or hairstyle while growing up, but that idea sounds a bit artificial.
Other books worth getting are Toxic Parents, Stalking the Soul, and When you and your mother can't be friends.
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92 of 97 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Quite simply, life changing 22 Sep 2011
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I came across this book by accident and it, and the websites etc it led me to, gave me the answer I'd been looking for all my life i.e. why, when I never did anything wrong, was my mother so horribly cruel to me. It took until I was 58 to find the answer and whilst nothing can erase the past, the future should be a whole lot easier without the ghost voice of my mother ever present in my head to criticise everything I do. I had never heard of narsissitic mothers and I found the answer to be more complete and comprehensive than I ever could have dreamed of, for everything she ever did to me was there in this book or on the website 'Daughters of narcissistic mothers'. The cruelty endured by a child of a narcisstic mother is only one aspect that is to be borne, the other, particularly in my childhood when there was no Childline or anywhere for children to turn, is the crippling loneliness, made worse by society's unwaivering myth that giving birth turns every woman into a paragon of virtue, a loving goddess who will do anything for her children. Imagine how that feels when your mother will barely give you the time of day, or if she does, will make sure you know just what an inconvenience and sacrifice she is making by so doing and what a demonstration of your horrible persona it is that you ask.
I cried and cried after finding my answer, and then felt re-born. Free at last, free at last
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76 of 81 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A moment of revelation 6 May 2010
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
An amazing book which I read google eyed as each experience tallied with my own. I have only given it four stars because I don't think the second half which is about how to deal with the problem was as strong, BUT the diagnosis section is amazing. I spent most of the evening going Oh My God, this is me. There is a kind of reassurance in realising that the unspoken fact that ones mother is not a nice person is a shared experience.

I wish I had read this book twenty years ago.
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30 of 32 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Essential for all daughters of NPD mothers! 1 Nov 2012
By Missy
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
This is my first review ever but had to write it. After leaving an abusive relationship almost a year ago and soul searching why at 30 years old I never feel good enough or why i can't seem to love myself and after hoping that just once my mum would maybe say I hear/feel/understand your pain and I'm here. I realised that I needed to take a serious look at the whole me going back to my childhood, after researching for hours, days, months about abusive relationships and people I came across the term Narcissistic Personality Disorder often, not only did it describe my ex partner to a T but also it described my mum exactly too!
First I found out all I could about what NPD was. The signs and symptoms etc then I came across people recommending this book as a way to help heal the painbeing raised by a Narcissists brings.

This book is nothing short of a life line and saviour, not only is it helping me realise that it is not my fault that my mother is the way she is, it also showed me the family dynamics and how my mum uses me as the scapegoat and my sister as the golden child.


There is so much information and examples of situations, I can relate to a lot of them sadly. The book also teaches you to spot if you are showing N traits and how you can stop the cycle.
I read it through twice first and have only just started the healing and it will be a long process but this book takes you step by step.
I hope you buy it if you think you or some one you know and love night be experiencing this, I will be getting a copy for my sister as she is just starting to realise our mother is so hurtful and damaging and can hopefully use it uniform heal her pain too.
Be prepared to feel a whole heap of emotions but it is so nice to know that you are not wrong and yes your mother could be Narcissistic. I have just started to distance myself and my children from my mum and now its time to focus on healing.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Read it and weep..then rise up like a Phoenix...its not you..its her.
Im half way through reading this book and ive opened up like a chrysalis! Ive cried so hard and i feel so sad, yet so happy that FINALLY i know that im not...and never was... Read more
Published 1 day ago by P. J. rowlands
5.0 out of 5 stars Interesting
A good read
Published 8 days ago by Karen Gianfrancesco
3.0 out of 5 stars but useful!
Intense, but useful!
Published 13 days ago by LuckyMe!
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant
I bought this as it was recommended by Dr Phil McGraw, a famous American psychologist, and it is absolutely brilliant. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Max M
5.0 out of 5 stars was wanting to find out about mothers with this problem
excellent book helped me relate personal experiences to the situations in the book it was like reading an autobiiography reccomended reading
Published 1 month ago by bargain hunter
5.0 out of 5 stars Meaningful book for counsellors
Yes it has been an enlightining book which will give lots of food for thought. It was certainly worth the money.
Published 2 months ago by Pauline Malaszek
5.0 out of 5 stars At 35 years old I have just begun to understand myself
If you read this as a child of a 'normal' mother I'm pretty sure it would make unbelievable reading but as a child of a narcissistic mother it's as though someone has just put the... Read more
Published 3 months ago by L. PARKS
5.0 out of 5 stars great book!
excellent!!!! This book was very helpful and made total sense!! its really helped me understand that its not me!!Thank you!!
Published 4 months ago by Michelle Wall
5.0 out of 5 stars Interesting read.
Should of found this book years ago! A very interesting read for anyone in this position. Definitely worth a read.
Published 4 months ago by T
4.0 out of 5 stars Looking forward to read
Bought this and reading the reviews I am happy I came across this book. Hopefully I will never feel like the way mother makes me feel again.
Published 4 months ago by Liz
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