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What Mothers Do: especially when it looks like nothing Paperback – 25 Aug 2005


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Product details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Piatkus (25 Aug 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0749926201
  • ISBN-13: 978-0749926205
  • Product Dimensions: 13.2 x 1.9 x 19.6 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (65 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 12,544 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Naomi Stadlen has three children and three grandchildren. She has worked for many years as an existential psychotherapist who specialises in seeing parents of young children. She continues to work for La Leche League as a breastfeeding counsellor in London, and runs weekly discussion groups for mothers called Mothers Talking. Naomi teaches and supervises at the New School of Psychotherapy and Counselling in London.

For further information and forthcoming events, see Naomi's website at www.naomistadlen.com.

Product Description

Review

This book is amazing . . . It doesn't tell you what to do but reassures you that you're not alone (MOTHER AND BABY July 2010)

A great book if you're feeling like a less-than-perfect new mum (Now Celeb Mum & Baby: 4 star review)

The best book on parenting brilliantly insightful. (Guardian)

I wish I'd had this book years ago - to show to bosses who didn't understand, to friends who couldn't grasp why I was permanently tired, and even to myself - to know that I wasn't the only one who wished for an extra eight hours in the day. (Anne Diamond, television presenter, mother)

If you haven't read [Naomi Stadlen's] books, please do so. They will inspire your mothering (Battersea Yoga)

From the Author

I am very grateful for these reviews of What Mothers Do. I'm collecting reviews from mothers, from fathers, from grandparents and from non-parents. I'm sorry that I haven't yet got my own website. However, you can contact me through my publishers on info@piatkus.co.uk and title it: For Naomi Stadlen, What Mothers Do. I'm very keen to hear from each of you. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

23 of 23 people found the following review helpful By K. Kettler on 15 Jun 2007
Format: Paperback
I bought this book only a few months after my son was born, and I appreciate it more with each passing month.

The author looks sympathetically at mothers, whether they are stay-at-home, work-at-home, or work-outside-the-home. This is a book that gives you words for what being a mother means in a concrete kind of way.

She helps you fill in the blanks when someone asks you what you've done all day, and you know that you've been insanely busy but can't actually put in words what you've done. You know that you ran two loads of wash, changed 5 diapers, and managed feeding your child, but can that REALLY fill up 9 hours?? Oh yes! What about the nurturing and comfort that you provided? How about the education that you provided as you emptied the washing machine over 10 minutes instead of 2 as you explain to your baby "this is a sock", etc.

The "tasks" of mothering don't have words or an accompanying value in Western society, but this book helps you name what you do and feel good about it!

All I can say: Buy it as fast as you can and enjoy!!
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51 of 52 people found the following review helpful By Oh fiddly sticks.... on 6 Feb 2006
Format: Paperback
My husband bought me this book before our baby was born and I started to read it and didn't find it relevant (as I hadn't had the baby yet!)
But when the baby came....so did the book and it was such a good help and confidence booster in the mad hazy first weeks of having a new baby at home with you. I wish I had read it before.
The book, unlike other advice books, is a no nonsense, straight from the hip advice from other mothers. I loved it because it was just so honest....a relief in times that you start to doubt your abilities as a mother. It help me to realise something that I suspected from the start - to trust myself and my intuition. I really think that this book should be read by every mother.
From one very happy Mam and a very healthly baby - enjoy!
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13 of 14 people found the following review helpful By C. James on 31 May 2007
Format: Paperback
If I could write a mandatory reading list for pregnant couples, this book would top it. Read it. If you are already a mother it will provide you with a boost that is almost spiritual, if you are going to be parents it will provide a valuable insight into the massive changes your lives are about to undergo.

Ladies, if your partner is reluctant to read another baby book, simply get him to read the chapter 'Snapping at my partner'....a peek into why we take out the frustrations of our day on them!
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35 of 39 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 17 Mar 2005
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I have two really small children and a very tiring, chaotic life. Reading this (which I did in two days, despite aforementioned children) really cheered me up and helped me feel validated in the work I am doing. I will be buying it for all my new mother friends and I highly recommend it for everyone who is trying to mother their new children and feels overwhelmed, distressed, fearful and/ or exhausted. This will make you feel better and put some of it into perspective. I've never encountered another book which explains my current life better.
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18 of 20 people found the following review helpful By Reader on 27 Jun 2004
Format: Paperback
This book deals primarily with the first year of motherhood, and babyhood. Real mothers are given the opportunity to speak through this book, as many quotations are included showing a range of experiences that constitute motherhood. There is no law laid down concerning the right and wrong way of doing things. The message comes across that the best teacher is the baby and that any mother and baby relationship is unique. This book could be empowering and reassuring for new mothers. It would also be extremely valuable for new fathers to read this. It could perhaps herald a new "golden period of babyhood", as babies are seen as expressing genuine needs, rather than just being demanding.
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38 of 43 people found the following review helpful By Snorkmaiden on 25 May 2006
Format: Paperback
I have four month old twins and little time to read, but I saw 'What Mothers Do' reviewed on Amazon and bought myself a copy. I have been reading a few pages every evening, after the babies have gone to bed and I have a few hours to myself.

This book has at times brought a tear to my eye because it so accurately describes the enormity of motherhood and the complex array of emotions and thoughts that we, as mothers, go through.

It is a wonderfully heart-lifting book. On days when you really think you've been useless (and I have plenty of them!) and things have got on top of you, this book just makes it all make sense again and helps you believe in yourself as a 'good' mother.

It's very esteem-boosting and reassuring, for all mothers, but particularly new mums. I've read loads of practical reference books for parents, all giving contradictory advice. This doesn't give any prescriptive advice, but simply describes what a brilliant job us mums do for our babies and society as a whole!

Great book - even my husband is reading it and agrees with me!
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28 of 32 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 30 April 2005
Format: Paperback
This is an amazing book that--unlike any other babycare book--would make a great gift for a new or recent mother (or father!). It is packed full of quotes from mothers speaking honestly. It doesn't tell you what to do. It highlights and praises what you are probably doing already. It is written with "a big heart" stressing the uniqueness of each of us, that for me meant I could finally feel good about my own parenting choices while at the same time appreciating others' choices were just as right for them. My son was already 16 months old by the time I read it but it still helped me make sense of the disorienting experience of early motherhood in a way that nothing else has. I was getting ready to pass my copy onto a friend when I realised how much I still need it, 6 months after I first tore through it. "What Mothers Do - especially when it looks like nothing" made me realise how valuable my mothering was, in a society that says it is not worthwhile, and having this encouragement has been priceless. It could be for any person who is a primary carer for a baby, as the writer says.
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