- Paperback: 272 pages
- Publisher: Element (6 May 2003)
- Language English
- ISBN-10: 0007163169
- ISBN-13: 978-0007163168
- Product Dimensions: 23 x 15.4 x 2.2 cm
- Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 178,422 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product Description
Product Description
This amazing work explains that unhappiness is so persistent because it is hardwired into our brains. Dr. Baker argues that stress and fear were vital in primitive times, but are destructive for our lives today. We cannot feel fear and appreciation simultaneously and can only be happy by adopting practical steps for appreciating and loving life.
• Baker holds the view that we can’t talk our way out of problems – we have to do something.
• In his work Baker realized that there are key things that all happy people have in common and from there developed 6 unique happiness tools that he explains can be incorporated into our daily lives:
appreciating what we have
making choices
building personal power
leading with strengths
telling healthy stories about our lives
living a balanced life
• Don't just sit there, learn the these simple, yet amazing tools and make them a habit.
From the Back Cover
'Everyone wants to be happy, yet time and again fear, depression, boredom, and grief plague our lives.'
'What Happy People Know' is a major new work that clearly explains the barriers to happiness that we construct ourselves every day. Fear is the number-one problem – an automatic fear response ensured our survival in primitive times but this same instinct is destructive to our happiness today.
In his extensive counseling work with unhappy people over many years, Dr Dan Baker realized that when we are feeling appreciative of life and people around us, it is impossible to feel the fear response that makes you unhappy. The other major barriers to happiness that he identified are the 'happiness traps', including: status seeking, couch potato living, pessimism and perfectionism, all of which make us lose sight of what we want, and what really makes us happy.
He was able to pinpoint the key things that happy people know and in doing so, developed six unique 'happiness tools' that we can use in our daily lives:
'
• Appreciating what we have
• Making choices
• Building personal power
• Leading with our strengths
• Telling healthy stories about our lives
• Living a balanced life
'
'BY USING THESE SIMPLE – YET AMAZING – TOOLS, WE CAN ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPY PEOPLE KNOW.'
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
This book fully fits in the current positive psychology movement, of which I consider emotional intelligence to be a part, too. The authors explain how many people tend to make themselves unhappy, by having the wrong expectations from life and by looking for happiness in the wrong places.
Reading this book should help you change your minds and figure out why you must stop running those unhappiness patterns. The book is illustrated with numerous examples of how Dan baker helped his patients achieve this and at the end of the book you get an “action plan”, which is unfortunately only an overview table of the “do’s and don’ts of happiness”.
I’ve hesitated to give this book only 4 stars, because for me it doesn’t fully live up to its promise of being a self-help book. It calls for a sequel, which should explain better how to use techniques such as “personal appreciation”, making perceptual shifts, managing your own emotions, using constructive questioning, etc. When I showed the book to some of my coaching customers of the past week, they were going: “Yeah, that makes sense, but how do I do it?”
The good news is that there are many therapists and coaches who should have learned the techniques Baker & Stauth mention. It would be a good thing for their clients if they start reading and applying this book, in stead of creating “victims”, by leading their patients down the old therapeutic pathways.
Luckily, you don’t have to start waiting for the sequel before you can get started on your own: If you haven’t been trained in the tools and techniques the authors recommend, either visit a coach who is willing to help you following these methods or search for a good introduction course in emotional intelligence or NLP to help you out.
Reading this book should help you change your minds and figure out why you must stop running those unhappiness patterns. The book is illustrated with numerous examples of how Dan baker helped his patients achieve this and at the end of the book you get an “action plan”, which is unfortunately only an overview table of the “do’s and don’ts of happiness”.
I’ve hesitated to give this book only 4 stars, because for me it doesn’t fully live up to its promise of being a self-help book. It calls for a sequel, which should explain better how to use techniques such as “personal appreciation”, making perceptual shifts, managing your own emotions, using constructive questioning, etc. When I showed the book to some of my coaching customers of the past week, they were going: “Yeah, that makes sense, but how do I do it?”
The good news is that there are many therapists and coaches who should have learned the techniques Baker & Stauth mention. It would be a good thing for their clients if they start reading and applying this book, in stead of creating “victims”, by leading their patients down the old therapeutic pathways.
Luckily, you don’t have to start waiting for the sequel before you can get started on your own: If you haven’t been trained in the tools and techniques the authors recommend, either visit a coach who is willing to help you following these methods or search for a good introduction course in emotional intelligence or NLP to help you out.
Patrick Merlevede, MSc
author of “7 Steps to Emotional Intelligence”
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
This book really hit a nerve with me. I have bought this copy for a friend. I had been feeling fed up for a while, one thing after another not working out for me and found this book in a libary initially. There is nothing in here you do not already know however the stories told are fantastic examples of how anyone can be happy and reminder of what REALLY makes us happy is a brilliant reminder.
I particually like the '12 qualities of happiness' Love, Optimism, Courage, Sense of freedom, Proactivity, Security, Health, Spirituality, Alturism, Perspective, Humour and Puprose. Like I said there is nothing ground breaking and it does not actually tell you what to do to be happier, we are all different and need to makes different choices that are right for us.
So, am I any happier? The answer is yes, some days. I still and always will have off days, I go over individual chapters as and when I feel a little down and it does help.
I particually like the '12 qualities of happiness' Love, Optimism, Courage, Sense of freedom, Proactivity, Security, Health, Spirituality, Alturism, Perspective, Humour and Puprose. Like I said there is nothing ground breaking and it does not actually tell you what to do to be happier, we are all different and need to makes different choices that are right for us.
So, am I any happier? The answer is yes, some days. I still and always will have off days, I go over individual chapters as and when I feel a little down and it does help.
Format:Paperback
I bought this so I could lend it to someone. I thought from the title that they'd find it useful but after I read it, I wasn't so sure so it's still sat on my shelf unlent...
I used to be unhappy but am now very happy and reading it for me was confirming that the way I think now is the way to be happy. But if you're locked into negative thinking habits, this book probably wouldn't have much of an impact on you? There may be one or two real nuggets in here, and as a positive person you can be satisfied with that, but a negative person will read it and see it as a waste of time perhaps.
Your reaction to a book like this ultimately will say more about the reader than the quality of the message I guess.
Yes maybe it's a worth a read, but I don't think it's a life changer?
I used to be unhappy but am now very happy and reading it for me was confirming that the way I think now is the way to be happy. But if you're locked into negative thinking habits, this book probably wouldn't have much of an impact on you? There may be one or two real nuggets in here, and as a positive person you can be satisfied with that, but a negative person will read it and see it as a waste of time perhaps.
Your reaction to a book like this ultimately will say more about the reader than the quality of the message I guess.
Yes maybe it's a worth a read, but I don't think it's a life changer?
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