- Hardcover: 352 pages
- Publisher: The Free Press (16 Aug 2004)
- Language English
- ISBN-10: 0743262530
- ISBN-13: 978-0743262538
- Product Dimensions: 23.1 x 15.2 x 3.3 cm
- Average Customer Review: 1.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (1 customer review)
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 4,903,122 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Vamped
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More About the Author
Product Description
Review
Christopher Moore
author of "Lamb" and "Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story"
With wry wit and deft turns of phrase, David Sosnowski has penned a darkly humorous tale of the struggle between two of literature's most horrifying creatures: a vampire and a little girl. "Vamped" is a fresh breeze on a genre that can all too often be as stale as a dusty crypt. A fun read.
Product Description
In a world where vampires are a dominant species and humans are raised for hunting and entertainment, affectionate vampire Martin Kowalski, one of his kind's original creators, struggles with a death wish before encountering a small human girl whom he decides to raise as his daughter. 50,000 first p
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First Sentence
Here's a tip: When you give the world one last chance to save your life, be specific about the how. Read the first page
Front Cover | Copyright | Excerpt | Back Cover
Here's a tip: When you give the world one last chance to save your life, be specific about the how. Read the first page
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
2 of 4 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
i bought this book on the strength of the reviews:
'Smart and funny' - Hollywood reporter
'One of the most inventive novels of the year...hilarious' - Dallas morning news etc etc
All i can think is that I read a different book.
In the novel, our world has been populated by vampires. There are hardly any humans left. Marty Kowalski is a disaffected vampire who one night stumbles across a young human girl (Isuzu). At first he thinks he is going to kill her but he ends up bringing her up as his daughter hidden from the world in his flat.What follows is a mixture of teen-angst and melodrama. Much is made of the fact that toilets are no longer required, so Isuzu has to be really careful when she flushes the loo. All her food is brought from nostalgia sites on the web (enough to feed her for ten years???!! I doubt it)
The writing is really self-concious and gives a real sense of trying too hard. It isn't funny, it is deliberatley trying to be a 'different' vampire novel. There are even some really poor attempts at political humour.
The best bit??...he called one of the characters Rose Thorne. That's about it.
'Smart and funny' - Hollywood reporter
'One of the most inventive novels of the year...hilarious' - Dallas morning news etc etc
All i can think is that I read a different book.
In the novel, our world has been populated by vampires. There are hardly any humans left. Marty Kowalski is a disaffected vampire who one night stumbles across a young human girl (Isuzu). At first he thinks he is going to kill her but he ends up bringing her up as his daughter hidden from the world in his flat.What follows is a mixture of teen-angst and melodrama. Much is made of the fact that toilets are no longer required, so Isuzu has to be really careful when she flushes the loo. All her food is brought from nostalgia sites on the web (enough to feed her for ten years???!! I doubt it)
The writing is really self-concious and gives a real sense of trying too hard. It isn't funny, it is deliberatley trying to be a 'different' vampire novel. There are even some really poor attempts at political humour.
The best bit??...he called one of the characters Rose Thorne. That's about it.
Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com:
36 reviews
19 of 19 people found the following review helpful
Blood and satire
22 Aug 2004
Format:Hardcover
David Sosnowski's VAMPED takes a twisted view of the vampire novel. What if humanity were an endangered species on a world where everyone has been turned into vampires? What sort of world would the vampires make? Ironically enough, it's not all that different from ours. Marty one of the vampires that "flipped" the world by systematically recruiting more and more mortals into the world of the undead lives in a world where everyone works the graveyard shift. Strip clubs are still popular and the most popular drink is, well, blood on tap.
One night a little mortal girl named Isuzu escapes from a farm where they breed humans illegally for the black market. She and her mother have been hiding out in the woods. Marty discovers Isuzu alone and scared. His world has turned into one of sweet ennui. He decides what he's really missing is the thrill of the hunt of the kill. But something changes his mind and instead of killing the little girl, he adopts her. Not an easy thing to do when your neighbors would want to rip out her little throat if they discovered her. Suddenly, Marty gets thrust into the world of parenthood and must deal with all the issues of a father...that and being undead.
Well written with wit and more than a touch of satire and darkness, Sosnowski's novel takes the premise of Richard Matheson's THE LAST MAN ON EARTH, twists it and turns it inside out combining it with a touch of Anne Rice and Stoker to create a well thought out comic look at our world as seen through the eyes of the undead. Sosnowski deals with a number of uncomfortable themes in the book once removed because it isn't our world at all but a parallel Earth where vampires rule the world and even have their own vamped pets.
This novel isn't for everyone. Someone expecting INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE or DRACULA will be disappointed. If you're adventureous enough to try something new with a touch of dark comic wit, VAMPED may be for you. I wasn't all that pleased with the conclusion but it was the only logical way for the story to go. Still, I had hoped that Sosnowski might be able to pull off something a bit more radical at the conclusion. That small flaw aside, VAMPED entertains, provides a bit of thoughtful discussion and enough one liners to keep you chuckling. Overall, a very successful novel and quite fun to read as well. Now let's hope they don't turn this into a movie and screw it up for everyone or, if they do, that they get witty writer (Buck Henry or someone like him) and director (Guillermo Del Toro would do a fine job).
One night a little mortal girl named Isuzu escapes from a farm where they breed humans illegally for the black market. She and her mother have been hiding out in the woods. Marty discovers Isuzu alone and scared. His world has turned into one of sweet ennui. He decides what he's really missing is the thrill of the hunt of the kill. But something changes his mind and instead of killing the little girl, he adopts her. Not an easy thing to do when your neighbors would want to rip out her little throat if they discovered her. Suddenly, Marty gets thrust into the world of parenthood and must deal with all the issues of a father...that and being undead.
Well written with wit and more than a touch of satire and darkness, Sosnowski's novel takes the premise of Richard Matheson's THE LAST MAN ON EARTH, twists it and turns it inside out combining it with a touch of Anne Rice and Stoker to create a well thought out comic look at our world as seen through the eyes of the undead. Sosnowski deals with a number of uncomfortable themes in the book once removed because it isn't our world at all but a parallel Earth where vampires rule the world and even have their own vamped pets.
This novel isn't for everyone. Someone expecting INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE or DRACULA will be disappointed. If you're adventureous enough to try something new with a touch of dark comic wit, VAMPED may be for you. I wasn't all that pleased with the conclusion but it was the only logical way for the story to go. Still, I had hoped that Sosnowski might be able to pull off something a bit more radical at the conclusion. That small flaw aside, VAMPED entertains, provides a bit of thoughtful discussion and enough one liners to keep you chuckling. Overall, a very successful novel and quite fun to read as well. Now let's hope they don't turn this into a movie and screw it up for everyone or, if they do, that they get witty writer (Buck Henry or someone like him) and director (Guillermo Del Toro would do a fine job).
12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
At last, a vampire novel that does something NEW
28 July 2004
Format:Hardcover
Successfully treading a fine line between heartfelt and hardboiled, Vamped starts out by throwing so many fascinating ideas at the reader that you'll want to slow down just to take it all in. And it doesn't let up until you reach the last page.
Sure, it's all about vampires, but these bloodsuckers aren't the kind you'll find in Anne Rice books. Instead, they're jaw-droppingly ordinary, engaging in nostalgia trips, petty jealousies, tentative friendships-even selfless gallantry. Sosnowski throws in virtually all of the vampire "rules and regulations," but he updates every one of them, making Vamped seem comfortably familiar and impressively innovative at the same time. In this way, he manages to do the impossible: redefine the "vampire genre" without being cute, coy or clever. Sosnowski seems to have a great respect for all the vampire traditions that have come before, but that doesn't mean he has to follow in them.
Readers familiar with Sosnowski's previous book, Rapture, will find a great leap forward in terms of style and character. Good as the previous novel was, it often seemed to rely too heavily on its central metaphor (i.e., a virus that causes about a third of the population to sprout wings). Like the angel metaphor in Rapture, the vampire metaphor in Vamped is strong. The thing is: the characters are so well drawn and the situations so realistic, the novel would work well even without the vampire element.
This is a book you'll read for pure entertainment the first time through, and you'll probably read it too fast, Sosnowski's style is so engaging. When you go back and read it again, you'll find a completely different book, one that's even better than the one you remember.
And in case you're worried that Sosnowski's skimping on the blood and guts to get his points across, don't be. While there's stuff in this novel that you'll probably always remember just for its distressed beauty, there's also stuff you'll probably remember for its forensic detail. A splendid time is guaranteed for all.
Sure, it's all about vampires, but these bloodsuckers aren't the kind you'll find in Anne Rice books. Instead, they're jaw-droppingly ordinary, engaging in nostalgia trips, petty jealousies, tentative friendships-even selfless gallantry. Sosnowski throws in virtually all of the vampire "rules and regulations," but he updates every one of them, making Vamped seem comfortably familiar and impressively innovative at the same time. In this way, he manages to do the impossible: redefine the "vampire genre" without being cute, coy or clever. Sosnowski seems to have a great respect for all the vampire traditions that have come before, but that doesn't mean he has to follow in them.
Readers familiar with Sosnowski's previous book, Rapture, will find a great leap forward in terms of style and character. Good as the previous novel was, it often seemed to rely too heavily on its central metaphor (i.e., a virus that causes about a third of the population to sprout wings). Like the angel metaphor in Rapture, the vampire metaphor in Vamped is strong. The thing is: the characters are so well drawn and the situations so realistic, the novel would work well even without the vampire element.
This is a book you'll read for pure entertainment the first time through, and you'll probably read it too fast, Sosnowski's style is so engaging. When you go back and read it again, you'll find a completely different book, one that's even better than the one you remember.
And in case you're worried that Sosnowski's skimping on the blood and guts to get his points across, don't be. While there's stuff in this novel that you'll probably always remember just for its distressed beauty, there's also stuff you'll probably remember for its forensic detail. A splendid time is guaranteed for all.
18 of 21 people found the following review helpful
Fun, frothy and utterly forgettable
7 Sep 2004
Format:Hardcover
I liked this book a lot, and I'm a fan of a wide range of vampire fiction, from the silly to the serious. That said, this is probably one you could wait for the paperback for.
Vamped tells the story of disillusioned and bored vampire Marty, who's decided it's time to join the really, really dead. On his way to death a la reckless driving, he comes across the improbably named 6-yr. old Isuzu Trooper, who's just witnessed Mom getting turned into Vamp Snacks.
So in a world where the vampires outnumber the humans badly enough that Spaghetti-O's are repacked as lemur food and human children are an expensive delicacy, of course Marty is going to take little Isuzu under his batwing and plump her up. And of course little Isuzu is precocious, intelligent and tasty-looking, setting up a whole book's worth of Marty's internal give and take about what constitutes family vs. what dinner is.
The ensuing hijinks (skating in Alaska where even the dead make puffy breaths in the cold) are funny and sweet and Marty is mostly cute as he comes to have fatherly feelings for Isuzu. The real fun in this book is in the daily details (like why vamps have pets, eBay business in Count Chocula is booming and the workings of the BBQ).
The drawbacks of this book are that we don't really get to know Isuzu much, since the book is told from the rather scattered and careless perspective of Marty. This is chick lit without the chick. Huge, huge passages of time are skipped, with Isuzu suddenly aging quite rapidly here and there. The totally sexless Marty suddenly finds vamp love near a convenient point towards the end and I'm not sure how much logic I can suspend to really let slide the fact that a child can be cooped up for nearly 12 years straight with only limited freaky television and a couple hours with her guardian for company and not end up utterly insane.
The near-ending of the book is inexplicably darker and more sinister than the entire rest of the story and it sort of jars the reader into expecting the end to have more punch than it does. I probably was expecting too much of the author, but the ending was just not as powerful or as memorable as it could have been and it made the overall experience of the book disappointing for me.
This is a fun book, sort of flaky and goofy and not bad if you're looking for something to read on a boring afternoon. In my opinion, it's really not something you read more than once and it's not something you'll think much about when you close the last page. Like Chinese food, when you're finished, you'll know you had something but not really care much what it was or if you'll order it again. I wish this would have come out in paperback first so I could justify spending the money on something that really didn't leave much impression one way or another.
Vamped tells the story of disillusioned and bored vampire Marty, who's decided it's time to join the really, really dead. On his way to death a la reckless driving, he comes across the improbably named 6-yr. old Isuzu Trooper, who's just witnessed Mom getting turned into Vamp Snacks.
So in a world where the vampires outnumber the humans badly enough that Spaghetti-O's are repacked as lemur food and human children are an expensive delicacy, of course Marty is going to take little Isuzu under his batwing and plump her up. And of course little Isuzu is precocious, intelligent and tasty-looking, setting up a whole book's worth of Marty's internal give and take about what constitutes family vs. what dinner is.
The ensuing hijinks (skating in Alaska where even the dead make puffy breaths in the cold) are funny and sweet and Marty is mostly cute as he comes to have fatherly feelings for Isuzu. The real fun in this book is in the daily details (like why vamps have pets, eBay business in Count Chocula is booming and the workings of the BBQ).
The drawbacks of this book are that we don't really get to know Isuzu much, since the book is told from the rather scattered and careless perspective of Marty. This is chick lit without the chick. Huge, huge passages of time are skipped, with Isuzu suddenly aging quite rapidly here and there. The totally sexless Marty suddenly finds vamp love near a convenient point towards the end and I'm not sure how much logic I can suspend to really let slide the fact that a child can be cooped up for nearly 12 years straight with only limited freaky television and a couple hours with her guardian for company and not end up utterly insane.
The near-ending of the book is inexplicably darker and more sinister than the entire rest of the story and it sort of jars the reader into expecting the end to have more punch than it does. I probably was expecting too much of the author, but the ending was just not as powerful or as memorable as it could have been and it made the overall experience of the book disappointing for me.
This is a fun book, sort of flaky and goofy and not bad if you're looking for something to read on a boring afternoon. In my opinion, it's really not something you read more than once and it's not something you'll think much about when you close the last page. Like Chinese food, when you're finished, you'll know you had something but not really care much what it was or if you'll order it again. I wish this would have come out in paperback first so I could justify spending the money on something that really didn't leave much impression one way or another.
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