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Product Description
Synopsis
Examines the feelings of loneliness and mistrust suffered by trauma survivors, explores how these feelings affect personal relationships, and suggests ways of negotiating and coping with the trauma for improved relationships.
Inside This Book
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First Sentence
Those of you who have been in twelve-step programs such as Alcohol Anonymous (AA), Narcotics Anonymous (NA), Overeaters Anonymous (OA), or Al-Anon may be familiar with the fourth step, to take a "fearless and searching" moral inventory of yourself. Read the first page
Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Back Cover
Those of you who have been in twelve-step programs such as Alcohol Anonymous (AA), Narcotics Anonymous (NA), Overeaters Anonymous (OA), or Al-Anon may be familiar with the fourth step, to take a "fearless and searching" moral inventory of yourself. Read the first page
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Back Cover
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Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful
By Far Rider
Format:Paperback
I came across this book outside of Amazon.xxx, and it has been the first and only book that has helped me understand the trust issues that plague trauma victims. I have some experience of this myself, and found the author understood me surprisingly well without ever lecturing me. The author offers comprehensive questionnaires and exercises, and discusses the wide range of coping behaviours, issues and mind-sets that are obviously gleaned from much experiential work with trauma sufferers. Her style is readable, measured and highly compassionate: it never blames, derides or cajoles.
This is important: I find too many self-help books written by people with one-track pet theories and a desire to jump on the latest gravy train without actually doing the real work. Therefore - and especially in an area that requires the fundamental earning of trust - these authors are irresponsible in the effects of their pet claims on vulnerable people. People suffering trauma need to be understood and treated authentically.
This book does just that, in my experience.
It is not patronising, not Pollyanna, not Newage, and not arrogant about a "solution". It comes across balanced, experienced and helpful. I found it helped me with many aspects of my relating to others within my own process, and enables me to have a means and a sense of dignity to share and explain what goes on for me, as well as practical tools for healing. I truly recommend it. This is my first ever review, so please judge by that my rating of this author.
This is important: I find too many self-help books written by people with one-track pet theories and a desire to jump on the latest gravy train without actually doing the real work. Therefore - and especially in an area that requires the fundamental earning of trust - these authors are irresponsible in the effects of their pet claims on vulnerable people. People suffering trauma need to be understood and treated authentically.
This book does just that, in my experience.
It is not patronising, not Pollyanna, not Newage, and not arrogant about a "solution". It comes across balanced, experienced and helpful. I found it helped me with many aspects of my relating to others within my own process, and enables me to have a means and a sense of dignity to share and explain what goes on for me, as well as practical tools for healing. I truly recommend it. This is my first ever review, so please judge by that my rating of this author.
Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com:
3.9 out of 5 stars
14 reviews
48 of 54 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars
Revictimization
11 Nov 2003
By A Customer
- Published on Amazon.com
Format:Paperback
I have only read portions of this book... and what I've read of it exemplifies a punitive and callous approach to working with trauma survivors. Making an analogy to Frankenstein for a trauma survivor experiencing intimacy/relational difficulties serves to revictimize trauma survivors. Also, I think this book is quite reductionistic... and frankly serves to categorize trauma survivors' diverse relational transactions as "trauma reactions." This unfortunately can be fuel for partners who read this book to label any and all of a trauma survivor's thoughts, opinions, and feelings (especially if slightly intense) to be "trauma reactions." Then, the partner can in essence blame the abuse-surviving parter for relationship difficulties which may have absolutely nothing to do with the trauma. This book can be quite damaging in its simplicity.
60 of 69 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars
Sorry I bought this book
6 Aug 2003
By Peter Thom
- Published on Amazon.com
Format:Paperback
This book misses the mark. I am a survivor of trauma with years of recovery behind me. This book takes a tough love approach, constantly reminding the reader of his/her limitations and can't say enough about how those limitations may never be healed to his/her desire. The correlation of survivors to Frankenstein's monster is a pity. I get the analogy, but couldn't the author come up with something other than the truely heinous? I would rather recommend "Legacy of the Heart" by Wayne Miller--a much gentler and realistic approach to healing trust.
32 of 37 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
Trust After Trauma
11 July 2001
By A Customer
- Published on Amazon.com
Format:Paperback
I have read this book three times over the last year. Each time gave me new insights into healing the pain of chilhood sexual abuse. The author knows what she is talking about. I found the book very painful to work through, but worth the effort toward healing. My partner found it enlightening. Now he knows some of the issuses I am dealing with.
›
Go to Amazon.com to see all 14 reviews
3.9 out of 5 stars
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