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Three in a Bed: The Benefits of Sleeping with Your Baby Paperback – 7 Jul 2003

66 customer reviews

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Three in a Bed: The Benefits of Sleeping with Your Baby + The Continuum Concept (Arkana) + The Attachment Parenting Book (Sears Parenting Library)
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Product details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC; New ed of 2 Revised ed edition (7 July 2003)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0747565759
  • ISBN-13: 978-0747565758
  • Product Dimensions: 12.9 x 2.2 x 19.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (66 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 92,387 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Product Description

Amazon Review

Current Western parenting advice, says Deborah Jackson, stresses the need to minimise the "bother" that children cause; Jackson claims that this culture views the child as a potentially dominating personality that could undermine parental authority when older and emphasises that this tendency needs to be trained out of them early. The author disputes the scientific basis for such claims, and such a culture, and appeals to parents to trust their own instincts. Using extensive research she puts the case for a child-orientated approach to parenting.

This book is controversial, thought-provoking, carefully researched and passionately argued. It is extremely interesting, and, even if you don't accept all her conclusions, will definitely prompt the reader to reassess their own expectations of the parent-child relationship. --Alison Jardine --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Review

'A practical guide on how to get some sleep when there is always a little person around during the night' -- Mother

'An impeccably researched rulebook for the thoroughly modern mother ... lively, impressive' -- Daily Mail

'Draws on startling medical and historical evidence' -- Daily Star

'Jackson provides intellectual justification for what we already instinctively felt was right' -- The Times Magazine

'Read this book before you have your baby if you can - if not, read it anyway' -- Australia's Parents

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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Amanda Lewis on 18 Oct. 2009
Format: Paperback
This book should be available to all expectant parents. In an age where medical adivice can be overwhelming, and contradictory this book gives us information about a more intuitive way to parenting.
It opens up the possibility of a more nurturing, natural way for you and your baby.
Reading this book allowed me to trust my instincts, to reaslise that humans have been having babies for their entire history and that actually, sleeping right next to mummy and daddy is the safest, most emotionally secure place for baby to be. It explains the benefits to both parents and baby; explains how natural it is to sleep next to each other and how safe it can be.
I co-slept with two out of three of my children, I can not put into words how I so wish I had read this book before I'd had my first baby. It saddens me to realise how much we both lost as a result of not having known how safe co-sleeping is.

Do yourself, your children and your heart a favour, read this book and make a more informed choice about co-sleeping.
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41 of 43 people found the following review helpful By lynn_m21 on 9 April 2006
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I love this book, it really gave me the confidence to parent in my own way and to follow my instincts. From day one, my baby had decided she was not going to sleep in a cot, no way, she screamed the place down every time i tried to put her in her plastic crib in the hospital. I don't think she had absorbed a word of the Gina Ford book I read whilst pregnant and had arrived with her own ideas firmly in place.
After reading this book I just got on with co sleeping and enjoyed it. At about 8 mths she went into her cot, right next to my bed, without any upset. This is working well for us. But if she wants to she comes in with me.
All parents should read it, even if just to balance their views.
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I bought the book as I was interested in the practical safety aspects of bed sharing as I found it was the easiest thing to do to get a nights sleep while breastfeeding my baby. Before I read the book I was feeling a bit guilty and that bed sharing was the wrong thing to do but this book made me feel much more confident in my choice and now my baby is 5 months old I can definitely say I don't feel I have gone through as much tiredness and sleep deprivation most other people talk about. In fact, I don't feel sleep deprived at all, and haven't done for months despite my baby having colic until 15 weeks.
The only thing I would say is this book is a little over the top on other matters, as a new mum you can be prone to feeling guilty anyway and this book could make you feel guilty for not stopping your baby crying absolutely immediately every time he/she cries (pretty impossible) and for not wearing your baby in a sling ( I liked the idea of this but it gave me incredibly painful feet and back).
In summary, an interesting read if you are reading lots of parenting books, and if you want to share a bed with your baby it definitely confirms that this is a valid choice to make. The safety aspects I bought it for were in there but were only a very tiny part of the book.
P.s. the book's main message is that if you bed share your child will grow up to be more confident, happy and independent. So far our 5 month old is very content and sociable having slept in our bed for most of his life, but it is early days yet!
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By tillymint on 2 Aug. 2010
Format: Paperback
I love this book. i have found it so liberating next to routine bound baby books. it is so baby focused and so sensitive to little ones need for love above all else.
my only criticism is the practicalities chapter doesn't really explain about bed covers enough, which was one of my main concerns. this book is about so much more than co-sleeping though.
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93 of 102 people found the following review helpful By LHK on 4 Sept. 2009
Format: Paperback
Like many other new mothers, I have ended up sharing a bed with my son (now 12 weeks) out of exhaustion in the middle of the night. And, like many other mothers, I find few things more wonderful than waking up next to him. It was fantastic to find a book which told me that it was beneficial to do this; I am at a loss as to why co-sleeping is quite so frowned upon, as it is a very natural thing to do.

That said, the book does go too far in places. Ideas such as the reason why the US and Russia are the most aggressive nations on earth (it's a little out-dated) is because it is in these countries where co-sleeping rates are lowest, demonstrate that the book's agenda is clear, and not quite as scientifically based as it appears. I expect that most members of the Taliban slept in their parents' beds as that's what happens in Central Asia - and look how they turned out!

I also think that there is far more to bringing up happy, confident children than co-sleeping, whereas both the book and other reviewers seem to think that co-sleeping guarantees this. I was left to cry as a baby, as was my husband, as that was what our mothers thought was best in the mid-1970s. However, we are both happy, secure and independent people, and apart from a couple of blips as teenages, always have been. We both have wonderful parents whose love was unending and unquestioned, and who always treated us fairly and with respect.

Finally, the book doesn't really deal with day time napping. My son sleeps brilliantly in a sling (Tinokis, an Isreaeli brand - fantastic) and I love love love carrying him around. However, I can't carry him all the time, as the book advocates. It's just not practical given our current lifestyles where, rightly or wrongly, we have so much else to deal with on a daily basis.
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