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The Zombie Survival Guide: How To Live Like A King After The Outbreak Paperback – 5 Dec 2009


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Product details

  • Paperback: 128 pages
  • Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform (5 Dec 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1449564879
  • ISBN-13: 978-1449564872
  • Product Dimensions: 0.7 x 15 x 22.5 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 2.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 3,603,604 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Andy Phillips on 24 Aug 2011
Format: Paperback
I read this book as I'll read anything with zombies in it, to be honest. This is one of many zombie survival guides that are out there, and although others feature subtle humour, this one is an outright attempt to be funny. Sadly, it fails most of the time. I admit that I laughed a couple of times, but the majority of the jokes are childish or offensive to some degree. It reminded me of 'Real Ultimate Power' book about ninjas by Robert Hamburger, but with too much swearing and many jokes in bad taste.

The book isn't very long, but contains a number of chapters about the origins of zombies, preparation, surviving the outbreak and so on. However, it differs from most guides in that it talks about training zombies to be your slaves and focuses on making the most of the apocalypse. While this is at least original (as far as I know), it's not brilliantly written.

If you don't mind average to poor formatting and editing and aren't too fussy so long as there are zombies in a book, then please go ahead and read it. If you're easily offended or you are more selective in your choice of books, then look elsewhere.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)

Amazon.com: 42 reviews
34 of 38 people found the following review helpful
If the zombies don't kill you, the gut-wrenching laughter will 21 Dec 2009
By Jamie Sanchez-Riehle - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
Etienne DeForest's book is racist, misogynistic, culturally insensitive, and peppered with both latent/blatant homophobia, homoerotic and bestiality references. It is violent and sexually explicit, and the author manages to both repeatedly offend and incite the reader, no matter one's predilections, in such a way that you have to keep reading in order to see if it gets worse. The book is also utterly hilarious. The author's tongue-in-cheek (and frequently self-deprecating) humor leaves no one spared: Christians, skin-heads, bikers, Easter Islanders, fat girls, alchemists-They all receive the same ridiculously funny treatment.

The Zombie Survival Guide: How To Live Like A King After The Outbreak isn't G-rated. It isn't the kind of book you should let your 13-year-old take to school, unless you're not opposed to suspensions or mandatory referrals to child psychologists. It also isn't the kind of book you want to read in public, unless you don't mind people staring at you when you're close to tears laughing. I read this book in an airport, and it wasn't long before a security guard on a Segway began making regular trips past me. Fortunately it was a quick read and I was able to board my plane without incident.

As a person who has never been excessively concerned with potential zombie outbreaks, I now feel very prepared should one happen. Not only do I have a working knowledge of weapons suitable for both long- and close-range attacks, I also have gained enough insight about the history, sociology, and biology of zombies to entertain dinner party companions for hours. DeForest is clever. The book isn't pretty, but then again, neither are zombie outbreaks. How effective this book is can only be determined once an actual outbreak has occurred, at which point I will be updating this review, because I plan on surviving.
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
Undead in the Head book review 21 July 2010
By Lyle L. Perez - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
That is correct. Here is another zombie survival guide type book I am reviewing. I promised Etienne I would have his review up as soon as possible. I apologize for having two `survival guide' reviews so close to each other. Etienne is a very funny guy, most people won't find his humor comical because he does go a little too far sometimes. It's not bad, I think he's hilarious. When I got the review request from him he made a comment that might have made someone else uncomfortable. I, on the other hand, found his comment very funny. Etienne quickly apologized for the comment and I told him I was dying of laughter, he replied that if I thought his joke was funny then I would dig his book.

Like most survival guides they like to start with reasons why the dead rise. Without a doubt Etienne explanations are my favorite. Not because of the information but of the way he presents them. Some pages have images that go along with the text. When he talks about the ancient Egyptians having the first known outbreak there's a picture of the mummification process, and the mummy has the word `brains' coming out of it like a comic book. There's many other images like that, for whatever reason the zombies rise there is a picture with a character saying the word `brains'. I still get a kick out of that.

I will skip a lot of sections in the book because I don't want to give too much away. I'll briefly mention the `Dealing with Humans After the Outbreak' section. The people Etienne describes are perfect. There really isn't much to this section but it is funny to read what people would possibly do during a zombie outbreak ...like pimp out zombie hookers.

Moving on to the funniest section in The Zombie Survival Guide: How to Live like a King After the Outbreak, `Zombie Training'. I couldn't stop laughing at how Etienne suggests you train your zombie. It consists of beating the zombie senseless until it stops coming after you. That's basically it. After your zombie submits you can teach it to cook you food, take a drive, and even play video games. There are awesome images of this in the book, which alone, are worth the price, to me that is.

Like I said before, Etienne's humor will not be for everyone. I have read some of the reviews about his book and I somewhat have to agree. He does take things a bit too far, but if you want to read some crude humor I suggest this book. It surprised me how easy Etienne's guide was to read. All the jokes were clear and everything flowed well. I still laugh at some of the images in the book. It's one of those things that once you see them they'll stay with you for a long time.

As far as rating goes, throughout the book I was thinking in my head `this is a solid 3 Undead Heads'. I was on the very last chapter, `The Zombie King', and I totally changed my mind. That was probably the funniest, most offensive chapter I have ever read. I was at work reading the ending during lunch and I busted out laughing. My eyes watered and everyone enjoying their lunch in the office looked at me. I went outside to compose myself. But keep in mind that I have a very good sense of humor. I don't find things offensive when it's presented to be for humor. I don't get the feeling of hatred from Etienne so I find it easy to laugh at his jokes. If it wasn't for that last chapter Etienne's book would have received a 3 but I will have to give The Zombie Survival Guide: How to Live like a King After the Outbreak, 4 Undead Heads out of 5.
12 of 14 people found the following review helpful
Hilarious and Infomative 14 Feb 2010
By Calman - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback
Sure, you think you know how to survive the coming Zompocalypse. I did too. But now I know that I was only fooling myself.

Head to a mall?... Are you crazy?

Stay sober and alert?... Are you kidding me, do you want to become infected?

DeForest lays it all down; A history of the Zombie, the science behind zombieism, and how to kill the beasts. But then he goes one step further. He explains, in insane detail, how not only to survive but to live LIKE A KING in the midst of all the chaos. IT CAN BE DONE! And DeForest shows you how.

This book's mix of "in your face" humor and subtle insinuation had my side hurting as I read. Wood or Plastic? Brian or Brain? Complete with visual aids, it made me laugh while forcing me to realize my limitations. From long range weapons to hand to hand fighting style, this book continues where Brooks left off. And, did I mention it is HILARIOUS?

If you want to be completely prepared for the outbreak (and deep down we all know it's coming), and you also want to laugh your arse off, buy this book now. If you want to wait around and let whatever happens control your fate, you still need the book. Might as well go out laughing and knowing what you should be doing, you slacker...
20 of 25 people found the following review helpful
The moral of the story: Use the preview function 23 Nov 2010
By Aunt Lulu - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
If I have learned one thing since getting my Kindle: PREVIEW PREVIEW PREVIEW

I bought this book along with World War Z and a bunch of other books when I first got my Kindle. The cover was cheesy but funny, and I was in the mood for what I thought would be a good zombie parody along the lines of Zombieland. It isn't a good parody. It is a barely tolerable book. The humor is course and geared toward teenage boys. The writing is choppy. If I had previewed the book first, I would have realized the sub-par production and writing. So my fault for not previewing. I'm definitely going to be more careful.
7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
Poor Attempt at a Rip Off 25 Feb 2011
By Rich - Published on Amazon.com
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I bought this book thinking it would be along the lines of Max Brooks Zombie Survival Guide.
Instead what I got was poorly written, and high school like level of wildly sloppy writing that I can only describe as utter garbage. The author almost literally mentions male genitalia more than zombies throughout the "book". I read over half the book hoping the humor would pick up, but it never did. At best this book is a high school interpretation of the classic Zombie Survival guide, filled with misspellings and repetative amounts of just plain poor humor.
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