"The Ultimate Weapon" is pretty unique as far as Hulk Hogan`s cinematic career goes, specifically for being the first the first movie of the Hulkster's which 1) doesn't portray him as a wrestler and 2) isn't a comedy. What we have here is Hogan's first straight action movie...and easily one of the most boring features of his career. At least Mr. Nanny could be appreciated in a surreal way: "Ultimate Weapon" has its weirdo moments, but overall, it leaves you wondering why a movie this typical, go-nowhere, and insignificant to Hogan's career was even produced. It must have sounded better on paper; on celluloid, it doesn't sound or look like anything remotely interest-arousing.
The story: ex-Special Forces member-turned-mercenary Ben Cutter (Hogan) is drawn into a web of danger when he upsets an operation of the vicious weapons handler McBride (Daniel Pilon, Shoot 'Em Up) on his would-be last mission. Deadset on revenge, McBride targets Cutter's daughter (Cynthia Preston, Pin), forcing Cutter to re-become the military legend he once was to protect his family.
At first sight, the movie seems promising as an action feature, albeit a slightly plagiarized one: Hogan dresses like Arnold Schwarzenegger in Commando and top henchman Michael "Roarke" D'Amico passes as a Steven Seagal impersonator with his ponytail and squinty glare. However, the film isn't exactly brimming with action and what's there isn't too great. Four big shootouts serve as adrenaline centerpieces, but they're all pretty bland and filled with really dumb henchmen and slow-motion shots of Hogan running around. The two hand-to-hand fights are more promising but not by much: Hogan surprised me by throwing a good roundhouse kick and using an aikido wrist flip (there's the Steven Seagal influence, again!), but on the whole, they're not even as exciting or well-choreographed as your average pro wrestling match. Additionally, fellow wrestler/Hogan-lackey Ed Leslie endures the humiliation of being beaten to a pulp by Cutter's sidekick, Carl "Dean" Marotte (Beyond Reality); I'll bet jobbing to an actor did wonders for his in-ring career...
The movie is full of strange character twists, but they all come off as weak writing rather than B-movie charm: in earning the wrath of McBride, Cutter decides the best way to deal with suspicious UN guys (these are his allies, mind you) is to hijack a helicopter and shoot at them from above with a grenade launcher; McBride figures that instead of just kidnapping Cutter's daughter for revenge, it's better to try and rape her and then let her escape; and this same girl who evaded sexual assault not twenty minutes ago then reacts passionately to an impromptu physical come-on by Cutter's sidekick. Then there are the embarrassing scenes wherein it seems to take Cutter twenty seconds of steady climbing to scale a seven-foot balcony and Dean taking on a group of home-invaders with what looks very much like a plastic toy rifle. Things like this should at least have some camp value to the film but end just making it feel toothless.
The acting content is no better than all the rest: look no further than the whiny Lynne "Lorrie" Adams as Cutter's fiancé to get your weekly share of aggravation in under two hours. Also, it would have been nice if the movie tried to portray Hogan as a best-of-the-best Special Forces kinda guy, but - with the exception of a neat upside-down neck break - he doesn't ever do anything particularly amazing or talented and often needs to be saved his sidekick. Altogether, the movie is nonsense of the blandest kind and remains rightfully forgotten by most of the world: Hogan aficionados can do better and general action fans have no need for something this limp and schlocky. Overlook it!