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The Sex-Starved Marriage: A Couple's Guide to Boosting Their Marriage Libido [Hardcover]

Michele Weiner-Davis
3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)

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Book Description

6 Jan 2003
It is estimated that one of every three married couples struggles with problems associated with mismatched sexual desire. Do you? If you want to stop fighting about sex and revitalize your intimate connection with your spouse, then you need this book. But "The Sex-Starved Marriage" is not just another book explaining the reasons you or your spouse might not be in the mood for sex. Bestselling author Michele Weiner Davis will help you understand why being complacent or bitter about ho-hum sex might cost you your marriage, and with her acclaimed psychobabble-free, straight-shooting advice, she'll show you how to bring the spark back into your bedroom and into your relationship.Because relationship expert Weiner Davis is convinced that feeling sexy is a two-person job, she looks at the problem of -- and the solution to -- low sexual desire from a couple's perspective. Whether you're someone whose passion has faded or someone who's been hungering for touch, you'll learn life-altering lessons about bridging the desire gap and restoring intimacy and friendship to your marriage. And because Weiner Davis knows that one spouse is often more motivated than the other to work on a relationship, she offers creative ways to inspire your partner to change.Separate chapters address the spouse who's hot, the one who's not, and then both together. If you're the spouse with a lagging libido, you're far from alone. And if you're a man, you'll be surprised to learn that staggering numbers of men, even men whose sexual machinery works just fine, "get headaches" too! If you're the low-desire spouse, you'll learn about the physiological and psychological factors, including unresolved relationshipissues, that may contribute to the chill in your bedroom. You'll learn the truth about sexual desire: that for millions of men or women it doesn't just happen; you have to "make" it happen. Finally, you'll find specific, pragmatic, and often provocative solutions to help you discover the siren or seducer within. If you're the more highly sexed partner, you'll breathe a sigh of relief. At last someone understands your feelings about the void in your marriage. Discover why your pleas for touch have fallen upon deaf ears and why your approach to the lull in your sexual relationship could be a sexual turnoff. Most important, you'll find tools you can use to reach out in ways that will make your spouse more responsive. Finally, if your partner is willing, you will learn how to keep the flame of desire burning "together."Full of moving firsthand accounts from couples who have struggled with the erosion of sexual desire and rebuilt their passionate connection, "The Sex-Starved Marriage" will give you and your spouse the inspiration, encouragement, and answers you need to find your way out of a sex-starved marriage.


Product details

  • Hardcover: 209 pages
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster (6 Jan 2003)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0743227328
  • ISBN-13: 978-0743227322
  • Product Dimensions: 24.4 x 16.2 x 2.2 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 858,921 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Review

Diane Solleewww.smartmarriages.comLeave it to the Divorce Buster -- the woman who has rescued so many from seemingly hopeless marriages -- to crack the code on the most vexing and paradoxical problem facing couples. There is nothing more frustrating than to live in a sex-starved marriage -- to sit down to a banquet every night only to realize you have no appetite -- that you don't even feel like picking up your fork. The first step to regaining your appetite is to buy this book. The second is to read it. The third, well...you'll see! Bon appetit!

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
23 of 26 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
This is a practical guide to avoiding the pitfalls of a marriage gone stale, ie: affairs, divorce , learning the hard way. The few pounds it costs is definately worth spending because it provides some very useful, fun and sexy suggestions for rescuing the libido from under the piles of detritius which modern life tends to heap on it.
If you go so far as to buy this then a) you feel that your relationship is worth saving and you will probably make the effort to try some of the techniques which are recommended, and b) you will inject excitement into your relationship and c) look at your partner afresh and begin to recapture some of the respect and desire which has quite possibly been diminishing for several years.
A good book which provokes much thought,laughter and pleasure
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13 of 16 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Low desire? Then buy this book. 22 April 2013
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I didn't find this helpful. If you're the one with high desire, not pressurising or getting angry with your spouse and you're both communicating well, it's not really worth reading. It could help you understand a low desire person more and understand why it's usually good at the start, when with some one new and stop you feeling duped... The author basically admits this at the end of the book. She was the low desire person and changed the way she thought about it, made more effort etc. I found it repetitive and patronising because I don't feel my hubby and I have difficulty with communication we have a very affectionate, loving relationship and simply have totally different sex drives. The person with high desire and completely wanting to stay married has to put up with it, stay kind and encouraging to their partner, hope they'll find it in their heart to see your pain and make more effort. Don't buy this if you're wanting your low desire partner to read it, it'll gather dust because he/she won't see there's a problem. The author even admits this but later in the book says she hopes you're reading it as a couple and that 'by now your spouse should hopefully be making changes'. Not meaning to sound like I'm passing 'blame' it might help some people improve their sex lives, especially if the low desire person reads it. Not all high desire people are nasty and angry or unable to communicate their needs.
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18 of 24 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars thumbs up! 10 July 2007
By Kent
Format:Paperback
I only got this book yesterday but i spent about half an hour reading bits from different sections. I already feel a bit happier and know that this is the sort of book that can help as it is written in such a friendly, homely way, that makes you feel cared for. The author also shares her own experiences of this sort of problem. I look forward to reading the book properly and also sharing it with my bf!
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3.0 out of 5 stars Three Stars 9 July 2014
By Magic
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
It is ok
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3.0 out of 5 stars not graet 20 Mar 2014
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
its not what thought it would be, its all stories about other people, its not for me so I would not recommend, if you want facts
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4 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Best book I have ever read. 28 May 2010
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
If you are short of sexual activity in your relationship and are unhappy about it, male or female you need to read this book. It may just save your relationship, even if it does not for whatever reason it will help you in a future one to avoid the pitfalls that make for an unhappy couple.
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