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The Relationship Handbook: A Simple Guide to Satisfying Relationships [Paperback]

Dr. George Pransky Ph.D.
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
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Book Description

18 Mar 2014
When couples go to a marriage counselor there are three possible outcomes: (1) they get a fresh start, (2) they stay together and “cope with” a tense or sour marriage, or (3) they separate. Every couple wants the first outcome. They want to have a fresh start and be happy together. If they can’t get a fresh start, they will jump to the third choice—separation—because they don’t want the second. They have already been coping and are tired of it. Problems and adversity are not the crux of marital discord. All couples face adversity, but it doesn’t cause problems for harmonious couples. Couples with satisfying marriages don’t “cope” with their lives and with each other. They don’t work on their marriages. The strength of their marriages lies not in their ability to cope with their problems, but in their ability to keep their bearings and to stay close. This book shows couples how to do that.

Frequently Bought Together

The Relationship Handbook: A Simple Guide to Satisfying Relationships + The Inside-Out Revolution: The Only Thing You Need to Know to Change Your Life Forever + Somebody Should Have Told Us!: Simple Truths for Living Well
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Product details

  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Pransky & Associates; New Edition edition (18 Mar 2014)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0971198802
  • ISBN-13: 978-0971198807
  • Product Dimensions: 1 x 13.8 x 21.3 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 55,150 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Product Description

About the Author

Dr. George S. Pransky is a licensed marriage counselor who has worked with couples in a private practice for more than 25 years. He is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Counselors and is an adjunct professor of The Academy of Multidisciplinary Practice and is an adjunct professor of the Estate and Wealth Strategies Institute at Michigan State University.

Inside This Book (Learn More)
First Sentence
Couples who go to marriage counseling often separate. Read the first page
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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Every person should read this book 17 Sep 2013
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Relationships make up a huge proportion of life. Happy relationships change the world. This book offers wonderful insights as to how troubled or even good relationships can be healed and made to thrive. Its the handbook we all should have when starting off a new relationship of any description. I wish i'd found it earlier in life. Nevertheless - I have it now and am truly grateful to have obtained these marvelous insights.
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2 of 3 people found the following review helpful
There is so much written about relationships, and most of it completely gets in the way of us realising the simple and fundamental human truths of how we are. This book, if you are able to absorb it with an open and curious mind, is really all you need to insightful see about what creates deeper and more fulfilling relationships. A game changer in it's field.
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12 of 19 people found the following review helpful
"Relationship Handbook" by George Pransky is not a bad book. Pransky's approach to relationships is strongly informed by teachings of Sydney Banks, the founder of the Three Principles movement (see for example Missing Link, The). The main premise of the book is to overlook to the differences and disagreements in one's relationship and "to start enjoying each other". The book also recommends to avoid engaging in big relationship conversations when in a bad mood, and to disregard negative thoughts and feelings about one's partner and relationship dynamics.

This book's advice will certainly help a challenged couple better than going to a bog-standard marriage counsellor trained by Relate, who are *usually* well-intentioned yet clueless about happy relationships, and encourage couples to persevere in staying together despite their misery and to "work" on their relationship until they lose their will to live (see my review of The Relate Guide To Better Relationships: Practical Ways to Make Your Love Last From the Experts in Marriage Guidance (Relate Guides) for a full account). More and more progressive psychologists, therapists and relationship counsellors root their work in Innate Wisdom principles made popular by S. Banks, and, in this way, "Relationship Handbook" is a useful introduction to these principles in the context of love relationships.

However, in my opinion, Pransky's advice is oversimplified and limited, and there are a lot of areas where this book falls short. Here is my account of the main two shortcomings of this book:

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0 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Well written and insightfull 21 May 2014
By James
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Extremely good book... made sense reading it and it feels very positive. Some not-so-intuitive concepts but what he presents as a very positive read and he gets to the point... there is very minimal faffing about or verbosity.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com: 4.8 out of 5 stars  40 reviews
31 of 32 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This book is not at all like the other relationship books. 7 Jun 2003
By A Customer - Published on Amazon.com
Verified Purchase
I collect self help books. I happened upon this book while going through my mom's things after her death. It is an older book, but with a dramatic difference from other self help books. I have learned so much positive information that actually makes sense. It is about compassion, intelligent conversation and actions. It shows how we over-react to situations and then things get all out of porportion. It also tells how to fix it and this is the one book that suggests that you alone, without the help of your partner, can put your relationship back on the right track. It is as basic and yet profound as can be. The main ideas is to use positive reinforcement and positive therapy to enable permanent change in relationships and their dynamics.
12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A better way 29 Dec 2003
By Marc J. Fine - Published on Amazon.com
If therapy brings you down, this book will bring you up. Previously published as: "Divorce is not the answer: a change of heart will save your relationship" , this book is uplifting and offerers something precious.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An Effective Approach 13 April 2013
By laurel taylor - Published on Amazon.com
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This approach to relationships seems so much more effective than the traditional approach of dwelling upon problems and then analyzing them to death. I believe that what we focus on seems to grow. It makes much more sense for a couple to get back to just enjoying being present with one another. Those positive feelings then start to grow deeper. The author indicates that with time some issues will sort themselves out without any effort. I guestioned that idea. However, it was mentioned that if you are going to discuss things, to carefully address any major issues when both partners are feeling upbeat and secure. This also makes alot of sense. Timing is everything in bringing up touchy subjects. It also helps to make sure that you and your partner are in a good mood as well. My husband and I agree that The Relationship Handbook is one of the most helpful relationship books that we've read so far.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Very helpful 9 May 2007
By Martha May - Published on Amazon.com
Verified Purchase
my husband and I have done a lot of work on our relationship, and were at a crucial turning point (for the worse!) when a friend suggested this book. It was incredibly helfpul and counter much of what the typical relationship books say --- don't talk about the past! Don't go into couples counseling! (I had been saying we need to go back and look at the past, we need to do couple's counseling, my husband was totally against it). It's really about connecting with your loving feelings for each other. (If you are driving down the road with your spouse and all is well, and suddenly you realize he didn't take out the trash the night before and that makes you angry, is it really a good idea to bring that up just to prove a point or do you want to reconnect with the good feelings and let that anger pass by like a cloud?) This little book is packed with simple thoughts like that which have transformed my need to be right over my husband for all of his (supposed) infractions -- not an easy task!
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars a MUST study and read book for man AND woman 12 Sep 2004
By HMC - Published on Amazon.com
I have read and re-read this valuable book for more than 10 years. I have given it (new and used) to every newlywed and engaged couple I know ... including family. This book should be REQUIRED reading before anyone is allowed to get married OR divorced.
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