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4.2 out of 5 stars
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4.2 out of 5 stars
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on 9 March 2012
Interesting read - to a limited extent - but the book is based completely on the theories of evolutionary psychology, so the fundamental message at the heart of this book - which they say explicityly again and again - is that WOMEN WANT RESOURCES (basically a man who can provide money/financial success/resources/look after her) and MEN WANT YOUNG/HEALTHY/ATTRACTIVE looking women (for reproductive purposes).

All very well and good but its a one dimensional and limited view. If it were true, then every out of work male actor or male earning below the national average wage would be single, as would every woman who isn't at least 7.5/10 on the physical attractiveness scale who would never be in a successful relationship, and would never get married.

Some of the things they say in this book are just bizarre and/or infuriating. For example:-

"Love rule for men - you must show heartfelt concern and public sadness for the death of your girlfriend's cat even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan."

"Aging female movie stars with young men. From an evolutionary standpoint, this relationship has no value because these women have no reproductive value."

Some interesting commentary in this book, but its so one dimensional to the point of being distateful.
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on 18 February 2011
I bought quite a few books recently, all of them more or less on the same topics. When I started reading this book I just couldn't stop. I liked the idea that everything is based on the research; it explains it in a way that is very easy to understand and gives plenty of examples and it's very easy to read. Also the book has interesting pictures and phrases that really make you think and laugh at the same time. I loved this book and it opened my eyes on many things that I didn't know about men.

I would recommend this book.
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on 29 December 2009
This book is very fun, easy and quick to read. It contains references to evolutionary biology/psychology as well as surveys and research done on women on various topics. As such it is quiet informative and filled with heaps of interesting facts on women. Authors have also included funny jokes and remarks on various topics relating to male-female relationships along the way which makes this book fun to read too.
I did find that authors have in some sections heavily referenced research/surveys conducted by Buss Labs (ie. David Buss, an expert in this field). So if you like the sections of this book that refer to surveys and experiments done on women, I suggest you also read the book written by David Buss titled "Why Women Have Sex". This book has just been released (see my other reviews) and would compliment this book very much.
I do wish there are more books like this out there. So far I have only managed to find these two.
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on 24 February 2010
I found this book very disapointing as it depicts men in a way I would only expect to hear in a mosque. For me the "clincher" was the fact that Australian women reported the lowest level of satisfaction with their partners.
It misses the vital point that there are different kinds of women and women and conveniently ignores the fact that humans have different needs and personalities etc.

All in all, unless you just want to enforce your belief in gender stereotypes, I wouldn't bother.
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on 25 November 2009
I did enjoy reading this book but i came away thinking and feeling that this book is very biased and categories all men the same.

I have been married and have had several long term partners and although i can see some of their male traits in this book, i don't believe that men are as mechanical as this book depicts them to be.

With several of my partners, i have had a higher sex drive than them!! They certainly where not up for it any day and all of the time!!

I think this book was written more by Allan Pease than his wife, as it hardly goes into what women think about, and i certainly know that women are eyeing up men all of the time too!! But this book kind of depicts that men have the monopoly on that.

And their are millions of women all over the world who look at porn too.

I think that women like sex just as much as men do, except we want more quality sex!!!
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on 22 February 2010
This is such a great book: easy to read, easy to understand, and yet very profound. My partner and I went through a rough patch, and he bought it. It has made an enormous change in how we both look at relationships in general, and our relationship specifically. Clarity and understanding are the words that come to mind. Highly recommended to anyone who is not a monk or a nun :)
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VINE VOICEon 6 November 2009
This is one of the funniest books I've read for years. It's politically incorrect, insightful and based on real life. The authors state their position from the outset, "It may be politically correct to say that men and women think the same way and want the same things but if you have had any experience living with them, working with them or managing them, you'll know it's not true." Men are attracted by a women's health, fertility and youth while women are motivated by a man's power, status, commitment and material resources (at least I managed the commitment!)

Apparently love is mainly biological, triggered " by a combination of brain chemicals, including dopamine, oxytocin, testosterone, oestrogen and norepinephrine" with testosterone and oxytocin the main culprits by changing in proportion and giving the false impression that the sex drive in males and females is the same. It's nature's way of drawing us into the procreation process. One researcher described falling in love as "a distinct set of chemical events occurring in the brain that has similarities with mental illness". As mental illness often produces a skewed version of reality this might explain why people remain in relationships long after the relationship has run out of steam.

Sex changes with society's expectations with Hollywood and the media playing a major role in people's perceptions of their ideal partner. Prior to the 'sixties the ideal man was the tall, rugged, John Wayne, a man's man and patriot, who was always respectful towards the ladies. Since then the ideal man is like Tom Cruise, short, good looking, telling women they should be silent during childbirth and an evangelist against psychiatry. Almost twenty percent of couples cohabit - some with members of the same sex - and divorce rates are on the increase everywhere. On the good side the notion that 60 equates to old age has been challenged by numerous people including Sean Connery, Joan Collins and Paul McCartney. "This is the first generation of humans who refuse to acknowledge ageing." It doesn't stop it of course but it does make one feel better.

Men and women have different needs. According to one of the jokes in the book, a woman wants one man to satisfy her every little need while a man wants every woman to satisfy his one little need. It's a caricature of course - isn't it? Women say they are looking for love, faithfulness, kindness, commitment, education and intelligence in a man. Men are looking for personality, attractiveness, brains, humour and a good body in a woman. According to sex researcher Alfred Kinsey 69% of American males had been to a prostitute but only 1% of women. Figures released in 2008 show that the UK was the most promiscuous country in the world. In the UK 80% of teenagers "lose their virginity when they are drunk or feel pressured into having sex". Sex has become socially casual rather than biologically driven.

The authors produce the anticipated mating rating quiz which could lead to a perfect match between partners. These are not necessarily accurate. Couples should have the same core beliefs about politics, although Arnold Schwarzenegger is a Republican and his wife Maria Shriver a Democrat. Other core values include attitudes to raising children and to discipline (which seems to under-estimate the ability of children to play one parent off against another no matter how united they are in theory). The authors suggest that "understanding where we came from and how we inherited our motivations lets us control our present and direct our future". I'm not convinced members of either sex will ever really understand the other. What is more important is to increase the lack of recognition in ourselves in order to provide recognition for others. Love is about giving not taking. It's about substituting selflessness for selfishness.

The book is full of witticisms, many of which have an element of truth, as long as you don't take them too seriously. It's worth five stars for the laughs alone even if it doesn't fully explain why men want sex and women need love.
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on 18 October 2009
A great book using hard facts and science to illustrate the differences between the way men and women have evolved according to Darwin's Theory of Evolution. Plenty of jokes and stories keep the reader interested, and it's very easy to understand. Plenty of useful advice on dating and mating for the modern age.
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on 11 April 2011
Yet another novel indepth look into relationships Allan & Barbara have many titles to their credit all about the people and how they react with each other and in some cases there are simularities between the books. However, `The Mating Game` is different enough to make it a must. I confess to being a fan of their light-hearted way of dealing with sensitive issues
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on 20 April 2011
Very funny. Could easily be viewed as a bit sexist, however to me it represents a more traditional view of men and women backed up by basic psychological research (which is easy to understand and not paronising) Doesnt impose belief systems upon you; it just tells it how it is. Take it with a pinch of salt, it mostly makes sense. Great.
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