In this empowering book, Gavin de Becker, the man Oprah Winfrey calls the US' leading expert on violent behaviour, shows you how to spot even subtle signs of danger - before it's too late. Shattering the myth that most violent acts are unpredictable, de Becker, whose clients include top Hollywood stars and government agencies, offers specific ways to protect yourself and those you love, including: how to act when approached by a stranger; when you should fear someone close to you; what to do if you are being stalked; how to uncover the source of anonymous threats or phone calls; the biggest mistake you can make with a threatening person; and more. You can learn to spot the danger signals others miss. It might just save your life.
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About the Author
Gavin de Becker is internationally regarded as a leading expert on the prediction and management of violence. In 1985, de Becker received a special award from the US Attorney General and the director of the FBI in recognition of his work in threat assessment. He is also the author of more than forty articles and white papers, co-author of CONFIDENTIAL REPORT TO MANAGEMENT: UNDERSTANDING AND PREVENTING WORKPLACE VIOLENCE and the contributing-author of STALKED.
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He had probably been watching her for a while. Read the first page
Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover
He had probably been watching her for a while. Read the first page
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index | Back Cover
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
25 of 25 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
Gavin de Becker's book is far more than I expected. Typically self-help books tend to be rather shrill and include a lot of large font type with daft mnemonics; one suspects the material is a bit thin and has been stretched over the available space. But with de Becker he has (as he ruefully admits) a great deal more than he could (or would) ever recount.
The book's central core is to identify the signs that the author claims one intuitively detects and then to act on them rather than to dismiss them. He opens with a very powerful piece (which I have read before) on the signs that a rape-victim dismissed and those which she picked up to avoid becoming a murder victim. He also identifies the approach used by controlling men. This account completely changed how I would offer help to a woman. This is not just a limited topic however; the identified controlling strategies are ones you will all encounter when talking to salesmen, bossy people and bosses. By identifying them you can act to defuse the alpha-male. The author also does a very good feature on saying "No" clearly.
There is much else that is useful in this book, his chapters on stalkers are particularly good. The keys I took away were that de Becker was himself a victim of violence and had used it well, that his advice was not some macho dream but that stalkers are best defeated by lack of contact and that restraining orders may work in the opposite direction. He also points out that what makes these men monsters is actually what makes them the most human; they act predictably if amorally.
Well written and moderate in tone, I got a lot more than I expected when I bought the book.
The book's central core is to identify the signs that the author claims one intuitively detects and then to act on them rather than to dismiss them. He opens with a very powerful piece (which I have read before) on the signs that a rape-victim dismissed and those which she picked up to avoid becoming a murder victim. He also identifies the approach used by controlling men. This account completely changed how I would offer help to a woman. This is not just a limited topic however; the identified controlling strategies are ones you will all encounter when talking to salesmen, bossy people and bosses. By identifying them you can act to defuse the alpha-male. The author also does a very good feature on saying "No" clearly.
There is much else that is useful in this book, his chapters on stalkers are particularly good. The keys I took away were that de Becker was himself a victim of violence and had used it well, that his advice was not some macho dream but that stalkers are best defeated by lack of contact and that restraining orders may work in the opposite direction. He also points out that what makes these men monsters is actually what makes them the most human; they act predictably if amorally.
Well written and moderate in tone, I got a lot more than I expected when I bought the book.
29 of 30 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
Never before has a book had such a profound effect on me. The sub-title is slightly mis-leading as the strategies can be used in all aspects of every day life. It teaches you to become more aware of yourself, others and your surroundings. I bought 5 copies for my friends and they all raved about it. One friend passed it onto her brother who'd come out of a car accident with severe disabilities. It gave him the courage to take charge of his life again. Read this book.
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
By AW Bradbury
Format:Paperback
I have had this book for many years and as a martial arts teacher (Kamon Wing Chun Kung Fu) I refer to it on a regular basis. It contains information that helps you to understand violence and other human traits. It is probably one of the most informative books I have come across and is useful to the non martial artist as well. It will help you tap into the primitive self protection system that exsists within our brains that has long been disregarded by society. If there is only one book that you are going to buy to understand the darker side of human nature this is the one.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars
Learning to "decode" gut feelings...
Gavin shows us to a completely new way to look at, and interpret the so called "intuition" (vulgarly refereed to as 'gut feeling'), and how learning to listen to it, could... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Mac.
5.0 out of 5 stars
Should be required reading
This book should be required reading for all students,who should then pass it on to all their family and friends
Published 3 months ago by Susan V Hartill
5.0 out of 5 stars
the difference between life and death
I don't think that there could be a higher endorsement than for me of this than to say that I FIRMLY believe there would be a lot fewer rapes and deaths out there if women - and... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Jonathan Jewell
5.0 out of 5 stars
Required reading for all women!
This isn't a self-help book. It's a revelation. All women should read this by the age of 16, it would reduce the number of rapes, murders and abductions considerably. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Fox in Winter
5.0 out of 5 stars
Not writing an essay
I won't write an essay because this book doesn't require an essay. All it requires is for a person in the right state of mind in the right sort of predicament to buy this book and... Read more
Published 5 months ago by Mark R
3.0 out of 5 stars
We have instincts for a reason
The Gift of Fear was recommended to me as a useful resource and while it does have valuable information it wasn't quite the book I was expecting. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Belochka
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Gift Of Fear
I'm only 3 chapters in and already it's made a difference to my perception. Absolutely amazing. The man knows his stuff very well and every word he writes, he shows his intentions... Read more
Published 6 months ago by Judith Herdman
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great purchase, essential reading.
I bought this book on the recommendation of a trainer friend of mine after studying a self defence course. And what a great recommendation it was. Read more
Published 12 months ago by Miss Emma J. Law
3.0 out of 5 stars
Must read - but somewhat dated
This used to be arguably the number one book in it's field - times have moved on and newer ideas have surfaced which modify some of the precepts of this book - However if you are... Read more
Published 15 months ago by R. Agar-Hutton
4.0 out of 5 stars
Gift of Fear
Using this book to support a detailed document I am currently writing for the judicial services. Although its an American publication and needs some de- ciphering the content is... Read more
Published 15 months ago by RayH
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