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The Butcher, The Baker, The Candlestick Maker: The Intimate Adventures of a Woman Who Can't Say No Paperback – 11 Apr 2013


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The Butcher, The Baker, The Candlestick Maker: The Intimate Adventures of a Woman Who Can't Say No + The Not So Invisible Woman
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Product details

  • Paperback: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Black Lace (11 April 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0352347635
  • ISBN-13: 978-0352347633
  • Product Dimensions: 12.7 x 1.4 x 19.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 390,193 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I am a London based erotic memoirist and the author of The Butcher, the Baker, the Candlestick Maker and The Not So Invisible Woman. My stories have been published in Ultimate Decadence (XCite Books), Scarlet Magazine and Desire. A publicist for almost twenty years, I can usually be found sitting at my kitchen table contacting journalists or working on a techy project or two. I once had a portfolio of lovers but now am happy with one.

Product Description

Review

"So hot, I just wanted to stop reading and have sex" (Cosmopolitan)

"Naughty, open and true" (More)

"Intelligently written [and] brutally honest" (Metro)

"Explicit ... an erotic adventuress who refuses to allow her sexuality to be caged by society’s conventions" (Observer)

"Taking the vogue for erotic memoirs to the extreme ... as mind boggling as it is shocking" (The Mirror)

"Eye-poppingly unambiguous prose" (Esquire)

"Book of the month" (Scarlet)

Book Description

A STORY OF SEXUAL REAWAKENING

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Customer Reviews

4.2 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on 16 May 2013
Format: Paperback
It seemed more than coincidence to me that I wound up with Suzanne Portnoy's The Butcher, The Baker, The Candlestick Maker in my hands to review. Its original release was in 2006, a year that flew right by me because I was in the midst of a separation from my two children's father, moving back in with my mother, losing my full-time job and entering a brand new relationship.

At that time, the world around me was reading about a 40-year old divorcee's wildly erotic adventures. Now fast forward seven years, the book has been re-released, and my life has changed dramatically and fresh meat like me got the opportunity to climb into bed with it for the very first time.

I knew when researching the book what is was about and what I didn't want to write about it. Yes there is sex and yes it is sexy...very, very sexy. And I only got that out of the way to allow me to say that that there's some really good stuff here. And in this instance the stuff I'm referring to is Suzanne's superb writing.

The sex inside the pages wooed me, but Suzanne's way with words wowed me.

The scenarios presented in this memoir were so magically painted that it almost read like an erotic novel, and while I believe that fantasy is great, anyone who knows me knows I like my sex with a little reality. That makes it perfect that there is plenty of emotion tied in with this erotic memoir's mistress, Suzanne's couplings.

No way does she does she make the mistake of confusing sex with love, not even in the beginning after she has sewn what she thought were her wild oats and settled down and married. She doesn't look for love in sex - not in dives, not in sex clubs or in saunas.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Roman Clodia TOP 100 REVIEWER on 8 April 2013
Format: Paperback
This is a very honest memoir of a woman who is 44, divorced with two children - and yet still pursues an active and alternative sex life. Suzanne refuses to play games of searching for `The One' but, equally, won't allow herself to be written off sexually, to become an invisible, asexual, middle-aged mum figure.

Picking up men through her job in London PR and media, via swinging web-sites, and various sex clubs, she romps her way through a huge number of partners and encounters. But beneath the sass and upfront assertions (`I'm not looking for a boyfriend. I'm looking for sex'), she also manages to fall in love more than once, get emotionally involved, and hurt. As she herself says, `I can't just push a button and turn on, like a machine. I'm in love with this man. That's why I have sex with him'.

So in some ways this is a self-contradictory narrative which, frankly, tends to make us warm to Suzanne more than if she were just some kind of sex machine. Some of her anonymous sexual encounters are, for her, supremely satisfying, but many are rather forced, mundane and just generally disappointing, and I like the way she doesn't try to talk them up.

This is explicit and unashamed, though too down-to-earth to be erotic. It's a voyeuristic look into another woman's sex life, and she's not afraid to spell out the details that we might not even share with our best friends.

So don't read this if you're easily offended by either sexual language or acts. I liked the way it deconstructs the cultural ideas we're fed about love, romance, marriage, motherhood, and The One, and Suzanne is an irrepressible heroine in her own story.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
It's been in my "to read" list for months, and I'm so glad I finally turned those first few pages! Because once I started I just couldn't stop. Forthright, startlingly bold, sensationally sexy. I giggled at memories rekindled of Rio 's & OP4Fun (described so vividly), tingled at tales of lovers majestic and not-so . . and shared the emotional ups and downs that we all encounter but perhaps could never manage to surmount quite so well.
Enthralling reading and so left me wanting "more" !!!
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By koggyboy on 5 Mar 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This book really made me chuckle but it was a bit samey all the way through. Read for titillation only.
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Format: Paperback
Even if you think you're a sexual sophisticate, this is still a startling piece of work because it's so honest and so utterly plausible. Suzanne is neither a nubile innocent learning to love depravity at the hands of Mr Right, nor a cynical old hack trying to portray a 'liberated' woman as some kind of blow-up doll with ever-open orifices. She's just a woman who decided to leave an unsatisfactory marriage and allow herself to own and explore her sexuality. She doesn't mind admitting mistakes she's made, but celebrates the fun she's had along the way. And as a fellow frequenter of the swinging scene, I can happily say that I identify with a lot of what she writes. I'd go so far as to call it truly empowering, because it is, in the end, a book about being true to yourself.
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