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The Bible in Cockney: Well Bits of It, Anyway.... Paperback – 4 Apr 2001


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Frequently Bought Together

The Bible in Cockney: Well Bits of It, Anyway.... + Bible Stories in Cockney Rhyming Slang + The Ultimate Cockney Geezer's Guide to Rhyming Slang
Price For All Three: £17.97

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Product details

  • Paperback: 132 pages
  • Publisher: BRF (4 April 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1841012173
  • ISBN-13: 978-1841012179
  • Product Dimensions: 12.9 x 0.7 x 19.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 173,392 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Product Description

Amazon Review

A rookery nook that puts the Bible into rhyming slang? That's The Bible in Cockney by Mike Coles. I've heard of speaking in tongues, but rabbit and porking in Cockney? It can't be Irish stew...

It is. Mike Coles is head of RE at a secondary school in Stepney, London. When he moved there 15 years ago, he fell in love with rhyming slang and spiced up his lessons by rewriting parts of the Bible, like a missionary of yore, in the native lingo. The saucepans (saucepan lids--kids) apparently loved it.

Here, he retells nine stories from the Old Testament, and translates Mark's Gospel verse by verse. He ends with the Lord's Prayer-"the prayer that Jesus taught 'is chinas"--which could leave traditionalists writhing in their pews: "You're the Boss, God, and will be for ever, innit?"

As the Archbishop of Canterbury suggests in his foreword, Coles takes the Bible "out of the formal church setting and puts it back into the marketplace, into the streets, where it originally took place." And he is right: beyond being fun, this book recaptures the colloquial nature of the exchanges between Jesus and his disciples, and unleashes some of the power of the oral tradition through which many Old Testament passages were originally passed on.

Readers will either love it or hate it--it takes lemon and lime even to adjust to the headings (such as "Jesus heals some geezer" and "Jesus ain't dead no more")--but this is much more than a novelty project. Go on, I dare you--take a butcher's hook. --Brian Draper

Review

'It certainly is a good laugh while imparting the essential message of the Bible.' Reverend Stan in The Badge, the London cab drivers' newspaper

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 30 April 2001
Format: Paperback
Dear Mr. Coles. Just to say how much I've enjoyed reading the Bible in Cockney. Like the children in school, I found reading the Bible boring, but you have changed that. It makes it a lot more fun, and the illustrations are great. Even my Dad who's 83 enjoyed rteading some of it and is going to get a copy. Good luck to you with the book. Best wishes, Pat Arnott
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By I. Groombridge on 29 July 2006
Format: Paperback
Well I never guv, this as got to be the best way of putting the Bible across to the Masses. it is both funny and educational with the highlight being the Cockney version of The Lord's Prayer.

Well done Mike

PS Don't forget to do your duty to both God and Man!
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Format: Paperback
I'm sorry for you, Rose.
The bible, though fascinating reading, is a load of mistranslations, censorship and errors.
From ancient Hebrew, thereon - with many gaps, mostly deliberate - to Jesus's native language (Syriac) Aramaic, through Greek, Latin, Italian, mediaeval & modern versions of all these as well as English, etc. wherever & when-soever it was inconvenient to whatever "church" happened to be extant at any given time, was censored/omitted/circumvented or re-translated to suit the religious arbiters of that particular time.
Also censorship, by the Catholic Church, around the time of the renaissance, made such stuff inevitable.
The bible is, though fascinating reading, nothing more than documented superstition!
By the way, have you read Ezekiel's vision of a helicopter? Chapter 1? Aliens? Dunno!
Anyway, I've ordered it!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Amanda on 10 April 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
A great book. It's fun but not offensive. I often use little bits of it to read to my church youth group, to get across familiar stories in a new way. But, even if you're not a Christian, the Bible is full of great stories and this is definitely a great way to read them!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By HK on 30 Jun. 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
The Bible in Cockney: Well Bits of it, Anyway....: well written and compiled, brings the stories alive and up to date in a fun and unique way, great book bought as a gift but we sneakily read bits before wrapping it up and enjoyed it too!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Charles J. Samuel on 12 Oct. 2009
Format: Paperback
Being an "east-ender" by birth, I thoroughly enjoyed this book, although some of the 'rhyming slang' was a bit up-to-date, and not as I remember it.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Ms DMS on 27 Nov. 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is a gem! I love reading it to my kids! It is such a funny translation. Get it as a Christmas Present... someone will love it!
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By Piotr on 19 Oct. 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
That is the first time I've met the cockney, not only short phrases, but whole sentences. I'm impressed. I've allways been interested in why Englishmen couldn't understend each other. Now i know why that happens.
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