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4.5 out of 5 stars22
4.5 out of 5 stars
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on 5 October 2007
This book is a must for anyone who is in important relationships with others - you want to be a better manager or leader... read this book, you want to be a better parent... read this book, you want better relations with your husband/siblings/friends/colleagues... read this book.
Since 1998 I have worked as a professional career and business coach and I long ago gave up on reading 'personal development' books - having found that they all say the same thing.
Anatomy of Peace is the exception to the rule.
It is an eye-opener of a book - for anyone - from the first time personal development explorer to the most hardened 'been there - done that'counsellor or coach.
Anatomy of Peace is one of those rare books that, in the reading alone, changes you forever.
After a degree in psychology, a masters in coaching, and 10 years at work with individuals and organisations on personal achievement and fulfillment - I read this book in awe. Each page had an 'oh my god - that's me, or... jesus that's why' moment'.
It has been 7 years since I read a book on anything to do with personal development that had an impact on me.
I have ordered 50 of these books and will be giving them to everyone I care about this Christmas.
BUY THIS NOW - it could be the most important book you ever read.
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on 18 April 2012
First its only transparent to share with those reading this, that because of the positive impact this book had on my life and the quality of my relationships at home and work, I invested many months of by time and many thousands of pounds in becoming a certified facilitator of this material in the UK. The book is not going to be for everyones tastes as the learning, models and concepts are wrapped up in a story format. I personally found the story easy to follow and actually increased the speed at which I finished the book and understood its profound learning. If you go to the hardcopy version I think there are six reviews which are very positive.

The book is based on the seminal work of Terry C Warner who made a key breakthrough in psychology. His approach explains that a lot of the problems in our work and personal relationships are not neccessarily due to our past experiences but because 1. We create our own problems by not following what deep down we know to be right. 2. Our self justifications then make us blind to the fact that we create our own problem. 3. We resist been told by others that we are the problem, because we are blind to the fact that we are the problem. Self desception is at the heart of many conflicts, broken relationships and dysfunctional teams. The book offers a way of understanding Self Deception and how we might become free of it.

For me there is no one book that is the answer to all our relationship challenges, but this one offers a philosophy and some really practical steps to more harmonious relationships and peace of mind.
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on 2 September 2009
I read this book after reading Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box and Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves. It opened my eyes as to how often I've 'been at war' with someone without recognising it.

As someone who has always believed that I see everyone as a person, it has been eye-opening to learn how flawed that self-perception has been.

This is probably one of the best 'personal development' books I've read. Simply because it doesn't hector or advise. It simply suggests and encourages and recognises that we all stumble and fail sometimes; the key is to simply get up, open our hearts and keep on trying.

I cannot recommend it highly enough.
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on 22 March 2009
A friend of mine sent me a copy of this book with a short letter. I had a stack of books to read, but given that this book came with a recommendation from a good friend, I brought it to top of the pile.

I completed the book in 2 days.

It has had a major impact in how I think about the relationships that I have with friends and family. A major positive impact.

It is a short book in the form of a story. It is easy to read, but makes a profound point. I fully recommend this book to everybody - but especially to those in a challenging relationship, parents, teachers and leaders.
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on 15 April 2007
This book really stands out in the crowd - it is written in the style of a story with characters which makes it really easy to understand and relate to. It's messages and priciples are clear, powerful and lasting. It is, without doubt, the best book I have read of this type and I highly recommend it.
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on 27 January 2013
This book is a follow-on to the book Leadership and Self-Deception that explores the idea of self-deception that impacts our everyday relationships.

This books focuses much more on personal relationships with the concept that our hearts can be at peace or war. It uses historical conflict and the fictional relationship between two people to show how their lives were transformed by the philosophy.

The second quarter of the book examines the philosophical side and can get very deep but keep going because the next section expands on the previous book by using four examples of possible boxes we can get ourselves into.

It then goes further by giving a framework to help ourselves and others get out of the box.

A truly inspirational book that is essential reading for all.
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on 19 September 2011
Absolutely loved this book. Follows what I assume are fictional characters, a group of parents going through a boot camp for their troubled kids and follows their progress, doubts and breakthroughs over the course of the boot camp. We quickly learn that perhaps it's not the tearaway kids who are the problem. Very insightful, very non-biased approach to problem solving not just for parents but for everyone in work, relationships, families, basically everyday interaction with others and how we can be catalysts for change instead of sabotaging harmony and progress. Lovely examples from politics, history and everyday situations used throughout. Great lessons in life, should be on the curriculum for schools.
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on 1 September 2009
'The Anatomy of Peace - Resolving the Heart of Conflict' is a book that is simple in its writing and construct, simple in its philosophy, and deep and very important in the significance of its messages for the world. I will not spoil the book for you and describe its content or its messages here as I want you to buy the book and you need to go on the journey of the writing for the messages to go deep. What I would ask is that you read it with a receptive mind, that you are not put off by the simplicity of the writing and the story line and that you then make a conscious effort to live by its philosophies and feel the difference.

As with all writings that contain universal truths and hold keys to major change, you will probably reach the end of the book and say to yourself "Deep down in my core I knew all that already, it is so obviously right, and it makes complete sense to me that we should all live in this way and reap the benefits". You will then probably ask yourself, "If the philosophy and way of being described in the book is so simple and obviously right, why is it not universally accepted and practised and why is peace such an elusive ideal?"

The reason I believe is that people lose, or never gain in the first place, consciousness / awareness of their actions and the thoughts and beliefs that lie behind and drive them. Only when that consciousness / awareness is present and shapes our choices and ways of being will we be able to recognise what we are doing and thinking and make the necessary changes. Of course, we also need to want to change, and that is the sticking place for many! The earlier in life this awareness comes, the easier it will be to make the changes before the thoughts and actions have become set in stone. So buy this book for yourself now, and then pass it on to all those you know who are setting out on life's path and forming their beliefs so that the ways of being and thinking described in this book can become part of them and can be rippled out across the world.
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on 20 January 2012
Although rather cliched in it's "American Self help Group" style, the fact that it's basically written as conversations between people being taught the point makes it very easy to read.
It made its point well and made me want to be a nicer person to more people more of the time.
It's quick to read and I think everyone should read this - especially politicians and terrorists. It would help make the world a better place!
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on 2 June 2013
Anatomy of Peace is sort of a prequel to Leadership and Self-Deception. If you loved Leadership, you'll love this one, too. If you are choosing between the two, I'd skip Leadership and start here. Anatomy picks up where Leadership leaves off, and is in some sense more advanced, but the concept(s) in these books are pretty simple and you might as well start here.

In reading both of these books, I felt caught between two feelings. On the one hand, I felt like there is a lot of truth in what the authors are trying to convey, and that I could gain quite a bit by adopting some of their attitudes towards others. On the other hand, the way they delivered their message had a paternalistic, absolutist feeling to it that made me feel like Big Brother was writing to me. The books seems bent on convincing, rather than discussing, and the manner in which the material is presented is quite like propaganda.

This is a short book, and easy enough to read. But, if you are interested in this topic, you could do better. I recommend instead: Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts by Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson. Mistakes Were Made is a much more direct and balanced look at the same topic, and I highly recommend it.
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