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That's My Boy [Paperback]

Jenni Murray
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
Price: £10.99 & FREE Delivery in the UK. Details
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Product Description


"really fascinating and very useful" (Piers Morgan)

"just as she brought both humour and experience to her best-selling book on the menopause, Murray takes the same approach in this invaluableguide. That's My Boy! covers everything you need to know about raising boys, from how to cope with hours spent ona rugby touchline, to how to tell when cuddles are welcome" (Waterston'es Books)

"an instructive and indispensible guide to bringing up happy and confident boys" (The Observer)

"A well written, humourous and ironic book. A must for parents with boys" (BBC Parenting)

"a persuasive and eminently readable blend of cultural analysis and anecdotal evidence, examining society's attitudes towards boys and the gender assumptions that we all sometimes make. She doesn't shy away from the big issues, addressing the thorny issues of education, fightin, sexuality and father-son relationships with a forthright approach and a wry good humour. A fascinating read of you've got (or are expecting) boys of your own." (Junior Pregnancy & Birth)

Book Description

Presents the latest research on the development and education of boys, drawing on Jenni's own experience of raising two sons, as well as that of other parents

About the Author

Jenni Murray has been the regular presenter of Radio 4's Woman's Hour since 1987. She also presents Weekend Woman's Hour each Saturday. In the Queen's Birthday Honours 1999 she was awarded an OBE for radio broadcasting. Jenni is the author of The Woman's Hour, a history of women since World War, and, for Vermilion, Is it me, or is it hot in here? She contributes to numerous newspapers and magazines and is an occasional documentary film-maker.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

Jenni Murray's Top Tips on bringing up boys.

1. Big boys do cry. So do little ones. Let them cry, give them hugs and cuddles and allow them to talk about their feelings. You'll be doing some woman in the future a huge favour.

2. Boys are born with an intact housework gene. Start them young on cooking, cleaning, tidying up and appreciating being able to see their bedroom carpet. (This begins as soon as they can walk)

3 Teenage boys allow this gene to atrophy. Get a dad or good dad substitute to nag. (Good dads do not shriek obscenities at the ref, know how to operate the washing machine and don't think 'boarding school will toughen him up and make a man of him')

4 Teenage boys develop a studied incompetence when it comes to finding socks, books, rugby boots etc. First explain the merits of preparing the night before. If that doesn't work, do nothing. Punishing the lack of correct equipment is what headteachers are for.

5 Boys will be boys. These are the four most dangerous words in the English language, used to excuse dirtiness, untidiness, speeding, rudeness etc. etc. Ban them from the house.

6 Boys do read; FHM, Loaded and the instructions for the latest video game. Only worry if they really can't read or if they're studying English Literature and haven't bothered with the set books. And make sure fiction is available. There are boys who love Jane Austen!

If the above really bugs you - never allow a tv, computer or games console in the bedroom. Bored boys definitely read.

7 The Victorians dressed their girls in blue and boys in pink. What a fickle thing is fashion. If he wants pink trainers or deelops a fascination for your jewellery, so what? But watch out for the 'poofter police' at school. Boys who transgress gender rules can be bullied. Support his choice. If he's ready to face it out, go with it. If not, let him please himself in the privacy of his own home.

8 Boys will bring home silly jokes (Why has a woman never been to the moon? Cos it doesn't need dusting!) Laugh - you don't want them to think you have no sense of humour - and then point out the flaw in the argument. Same applies to scantily dressed females on bedroom walls. Banning will drive them under the bed. Explain the exploitation argument and if that fails, threaten to decorate the kitchen with penises!

9 As one headmaster said to me 'Why do we talk about play fighting. We'd never discuss play rape!' Violence, even as a game, is always dangerous and someone gets hurt. Zero Tolerance is the best policy. Let the alpha males among you play rugby, but remember (whisper it who dares) not all boys like or need sport.

10 Boys are at more risk of violence when they're out than girls. Carry two mobiles. One small, operational and hidden in a pocket - the other, older model with no sim card is for giving up in case of mugging. Wear only a cheap watch. Learn to make eye contact without holding it for too long. Eyes downcast suggests weakness - a long held stare is an invitation to aggression. Always give them enough money for a taxi home (to be spent on beer on pain of death) and have them hide it in a sock.
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